first outing need advice

[Otto]

My wife and I are looking for our first outing. I have a friend who may be open to swinging. He likes my wife and his is very sexy. He hasn’t said anything to his wife but has lent me some of their home movies. I watched them with my wife. She doesn’t know if she’d be comfortable swinging as she is Asian and petite. This woman has much larger breasts, and is a tall, curvy blonde. She knows I enjoyed the home movies, and has even agreed to let my friend see one of ours. I have suggested if we do this we pair off in separate rooms or just a threesome with him for now. She won’t do the last unless his wife knows and I think she’s a bit intimidated by his wife. Any suggestions, hints? Any would be welcome.