I strongly suggest she continue to wear her wedding ring, always.
James,
If your wife is starting her last year of university at UCLA this summer, then is also planning to go to graduate school at UCLA or some other distant university, that's going to be a lot of separation. At some point your marriage might not seem very meaningful anymore, even if she were to refrain from taking lovers.
Re. UCLA, a point to consider would be that people who obtain advanced degrees are generally better off if they broaden their experience by seeking graduate education at a different university from where they obtained their undergraduate degree. In particular, if your wife is working as a student assistant with a particular professor, after about two years she will have learned about as much as she's likely to learn from him or her. Thus, from the point of view of her own professional development, she will be better off to move on to a different university, department and advisor. Ergo, I would suggest she consider applying to a university closer to where you live, if there is one with a good department in the area she wants to specialize in, to reduce your separation time and distance.
Regarding your request: "If anyone else has ever encourage[ed] his spouse or gf to date like this please write."
Early in our marriage, I separated from my wife for about a month to engage in an activity that was of interest to me. I was about as "gone" as one can get. When I left, I told her that if she wanted to seek pleasure with other men while I was away, I had no objection to that. When I returned, I didn't have the impression she had. (She stayed with her parents, which probably would have made it awkward — we were in the process of moving, and did not have a "permanent" place to live at that point.) Much later I brought it up and asked if she remembered me saying that. She said she did; she was shocked that I would suggest such a thing.
A couple of years later, while attending graduate school, I obtained a temporary research job about 2,000 miles away. Simultaneously, my wife started nursing school in a town about 60 miles from where both of us lived (i.e., where I was a graduate student). We were separated for about 5 months — then, when my job ended, she flew out to meet me. We took an alpine hiking trip, then drove back. The subject of whether it would be OK for either or both of us to take lovers when we were apart never came up. I won't say I would not have done so if there had been a good opportunity... but the idea that attractive single women are hot to fuck married men is overrated, in my experience. As for my wife, I never asked. I'm pretty sure she did not take any lovers during that time period — but I didn't consider it an issue, one way or the other.
Regarding your comment: "She [i.e., your wife] has read with me stories of wives who have relationships with other men and end up pregnant."
That, of course, has traditionally been the outcome of married women cuckolding their husbands. Since the 1960's, though, "the pill" has been available, and there are other reliable means of birth control. Also, the Roe v. Wade Supreme Court decision guarantees your wife the right to an abortion — although this may change, with the current republican supreme court. (Conservatives are always fighting tooth and nail to return women to their "barefoot and pregnant" status.) Surely you and your wife could find hot stories to read about married women who take lovers and DON'T become pregnant? There are many real examples, as well as stories. I mean, why spend 18 years of your life raising the child of a man you don't know, whose genetic background you know nothing about, and then, with your wife, spend more than $100 K to send this child to college, if it isn't actually necessary? Also, an unintended pregnancy while separated from you could easily lead to premature termination of your wife's graduate education.
None of the above should be taken as meaning I do not think your wife should take lovers during her separation from you.* In fact, I think she — and quite possibly you as well — will be better off if she does.
But, regarding her wedding ring: I strongly suggest both of you will be better off if she continues to wear it, always. As a clearly-married woman, she will almost certainly have no trouble finding lovers, in part because her ring will be a statement that sex with her is available free of any long-term commitment. Also, if she doesn't wear it and takes a lover who actually does turn out to be interested in a long-term commitment, unpleasant consequences could follow, conceivably, if he feels he's been deceived when he finds out. There are lots of men who are very territorial about the woman they view as "theirs." If possible, it's best to avoid having to deal with that sort of thing.
—Custer
* You might suggest
The Magazine of Cuckolding For Women to your wife. Perhaps you would find this site of interest, as well.
