Goodbye

[radicalguy]

Legal Issues

Hi Kyle,

I am a family law attorney. Although states are different, they have many of the same principles. In the state where I practice, you are the "presumed" father, but you can (and should) challenge paternity as part of the divorce action. Specifically, in this state, you would ask the court to order genetic testing and, ultimately, an "adjudication of nonparentage."

It really helps that you know who the biological father is. Again, in my state, I would implead the bio father as a co-respondent as part of the divorce action, and then the court could order him to undergo genetic testing, which would bolster your case. However, if he disappears, it would be sufficient to have testing of just you, your wife, and the baby to prove nonparentage, UNLESS she has a viable "adoption by estoppel" argument.

Bottom line, you should see a family law attorney in your state. I always charge for initial consultations, but many attorneys do not. In any case, DO NOT sign anything unless you get legal advice.

Rick

 

[lickerboy]

You are going through a rough time certainly. If you still love her, and Paul does leave, you might want her back?
The thought of raising a black man's baby isn't for everyone, but might be for you. If her bf leaves her she might realize the difference between love and lust.

You might want to consider staying with her and raising the little black baby. If she is hooked on black cock... just make the best of it. The cuckold life isn't for everyone. Maybe a frank discussion with her would help. I know you still love her. If you and her are willing to allow black lovers and babies you might be able to work this out.
I think you want her to always love you even if she shares her body with others. I personally would love this kind of marriage.

Good luck whatever road you choose.

 

[specialman]

I honestly can't see myself staying with her. She has betrayed me on so many levels. It disgusts me. I still love her and probably always will, but that doesn't mean I still want to be with her.

Custer, radicalguy...thanks for the legal advice. A friend of mine has referred me to a divorce attorney that he used who is willing to answer some questions for free.

 

[cuckoldax]

dude ur ex is a hot slut, you should love that

 

[kalidar]

Legal crap

Although we've already heard from a lawyer, and I'm not one nor do I reside in the US, I wonder if getting a *really* good lawyer might not be enough that you could get away with giving her almost nothing. Unless she was completely a kept woman for the three years you were married, she made her own money while not being married to you long enough to reasonably be able to claim that she helped you build your own wealth, at least from what I remember reading. DNA testing should certainly get you out of child support, but since the whole thing with her boyfriend was almost entirely her idea and doing, a really slippery lawyer could probably spin the infidelity angle and make everything almost totally her fault. If so, and I'm just guessing here, you might be able to get away almost scot free, at least in terms of finances. And frankly, if you can, she fucking deserves it. Stupid bitch.

PS Since you said you still have some feelings for her, I apologize if my calling her names upset you. But I still think she deserves it. Keep your chin up, and hopefully win one for guys trying not to pay alimony to cheating ex-wives.

 

[TexasCuck]

Although we've already heard from a lawyer, and I'm not one nor do I reside in the US, I wonder if getting a *really* good lawyer might not be enough that you could get away with giving her almost nothing. Unless she was completely a kept woman for the three years you were married, she made her own money while not being married to you long enough to reasonably be able to claim that she helped you build your own wealth, at least from what I remember reading. DNA testing should certainly get you out of child support, but since the whole thing with her boyfriend was almost entirely her idea and doing, a really slippery lawyer could probably spin the infidelity angle and make everything almost totally her fault. If so, and I'm just guessing here, you might be able to get away almost scot free, at least in terms of finances. And frankly, if you can, she fucking deserves it. Stupid bitch.

PS Since you said you still have some feelings for her, I apologize if my calling her names upset you. But I still think she deserves it. Keep your chin up, and hopefully win one for guys trying not to pay alimony to cheating ex-wives.

Another option is to sell everything (furniture, cars etc.) and empty your bank account, basically liquidating everything you own. With no bank accounts and no shared property between you, there isn't anything for the court to split. Normally I wouldn't condone such a thing, but one good turn deserves another as they say.

And also, I'd definitely shut off any utilities in your name, hell even if they are in both your names you can still shut them off and make her have to turn them back on in her name only. That includes phone service as well. You've been screwed over already, so you may as well protect yourself as much as you can.

 

[okdeacon]

See

What do you know? As the old saying goes. Aint it amazing Gracie!! Keep you cool head specialman as you will soon see what a lucky mother fucker you really are. Again Thank God & Greyhound Shes Gone. Enjoy your life and your neew FREEDOM. DONT BACK SLIDE!!!!! okdeacon

 

[enser]

Hi Kyle
Please keep us updated, this is getting interesting. It did not take a year for Candice to come back. I am sure she begged forgiveness. It was predictable. Now you are facing a tough decision. She is good looking and it is tempting to get soft and take her back. Her baby Isabella is also precious to you. If you take Candice back, tell her your conditions. This has to be settled right away. If you take her back, don’t make it easy for her.

 

[specialman]

I dont really care. I just dropped her ass off with Paul, got some stuff, and checked on Izzy.

 

[radicalguy]

Although we've already heard from a lawyer, and I'm not one nor do I reside in the US, I wonder if getting a *really* good lawyer might not be enough that you could get away with giving her almost nothing. Unless she was completely a kept woman for the three years you were married, she made her own money while not being married to you long enough to reasonably be able to claim that she helped you build your own wealth, at least from what I remember reading. DNA testing should certainly get you out of child support, but since the whole thing with her boyfriend was almost entirely her idea and doing, a really slippery lawyer could probably spin the infidelity angle and make everything almost totally her fault. If so, and I'm just guessing here, you might be able to get away almost scot free, at least in terms of finances. And frankly, if you can, she fucking deserves it. Stupid bitch.

PS Since you said you still have some feelings for her, I apologize if my calling her names upset you. But I still think she deserves it. Keep your chin up, and hopefully win one for guys trying not to pay alimony to cheating ex-wives.

State law has a lot to do with how much impact fault in the breakup would have in the division of the marital estate. Also, one must weigh whether the value of the estate is worth the legal fees that would be incurred in a legal battle. In any event, in a community property state, "fault" may result in a disproportionate share of the marital estate, but usually by only a few percentage points.

Rick

 

[specialman]

Ok..so today I needed some papers that I forgot at the apartment. I called around 10 thinking I would get the babysitter or something, but she answered. I told her what I needed and she said I could come over. I did and she had them ready for me when I got there. I took this to mean that she wanted me in and out as soon as possible. As I'm about to leave, she says thank you for bringing her back yesterday.

We end up chatting for a bit and I got to see Isabella. The whole thing was really awkward because we were avoiding talking about anything serious. She asks me to stay for a little lunch. As we're eating, she starts to cry and she goes in for a hug. I didn't let her and told her that I couldn't do this. I said I couldn't trust her anymore and I wasn't going to put myself out there again for her. She said that she still loved me, but I just looked at her and said I had to go.

On the way back to Andy's, she called me 6 times and its only a 10 minute drive. I didn't answer, but I called her back an hour later. I thought it would give her time to cool down. She asked me to go out to lunch tomorrow. I said that I had given her my answer. She said she just wanted to talk about things and that she wouldn't get emotional. I said okay, but I took Custer's advice and told her to meet me at this restaurant.

 

[Custer Laststand]

Have a good lunch....

Kyle,

On the way back to Andy's, she called me 6 times and its only a 10 minute drive. I didn't answer, but I called her back an hour later....

Good.

....She asked me to go out to lunch tomorrow. I said that I had given her my answer. She said she just wanted to talk about things and she wouldn't get emotional. I said okay...

Good response. Something has changed, presumably involving Paul. You need to find out what's going on (as I mentioned above).

As a general approach, I suggest asking Candice questions but not in a hostile way. Try to avoid being judgmental. Listen carefully to her replies and pay attention to her body language. Don't interrupt her. Look her in the eye while she's talking — don't look away as if you're some sort of "stone man." You'll need to talk about how all this is affecting you, but try hard to resist the urge to lecture her. Talk with her, not at her.

I suggest talking with your wife for as long as she wants. If you have to leave at a particular time, explain to her why — don't just say, "gotta go."

Try also to keep in mind (as I noted above) that you need, now, to be a "rational man" who is "in control" — but that doesn’t mean being a man of ice. If she wants to give you a hug, give her a hug. If she wants to kiss you, kiss her.* That won't mean you're a sucker. It will mean you're a man, responding to her as a woman. That's OK.

Have a good lunch—

Custer

* Studies have shown you're unlikely to be injured.

 

[specialman]

Ok, so I had lunch with her. I don't even know where to begin. She has a done a complete 180 on me. All of a sudden she wants me back and says she is sorry for letting this all happen. Her and Paul had a huge falling out. He is still living there, but they haven't been talking. I told her that all I want is for Isabella to be happy and safe. But I also said that I couldn't see myself getting back with her. She has betrayed me too much for that to be something I could live with.

I ended up leaving halfway threw the meal.

 

[Custer Laststand]

Sounds like you aren't there yet....

Kyle,

Ok, so I had lunch with her.

Good move.

I don't even know where to begin. ....[Candice] and Paul had a huge falling out.

A good place to begin would be a description of why that happened, as described by Candice. It seemed to be related to — was perhaps precipitated by — (her? both of them?) telling you they wanted you to leave, followed by you actually doing so.

She has a done a complete 180 on me. All of a sudden she wants me back and says she is sorry....

That can happen.

He is still living there, but they haven't been talking.

Does Candice seem to expect that you would move back into your (former) apartment with her while Paul continues to live there? This is a critical point.

I told her that all I want is for Isabella to be happy and safe.

Good. That's important.

But I also said that I couldn't see myself getting back with her. She has betrayed me too much for that to be something I could live with.

I suggest attempting to take the view that you got out of an unacceptable situation by leaving, and — as long as Paul remains in your apartment — the situation continues to be unacceptable.

You probably don't want to hear this, but it's my impression that it's probably still too early to say "never."

I ended up leaving halfway [through] the meal.

If you don't feel like you succeeded in attaining a feeling for what's going on with Candice — in her head, and in her psyche — I would suggest giving it a bit more time, then meeting her again. Maybe you could get through three-fourths of a lunch next time.

Meanwhile, you mentioned in one of your previous posts (as I recall) that your lease will expire in the near future. That's a problem. I suggest pointing out to Candice — say, in a phone call — that if she signs a new lease with Paul, she will definitely have to kiss her marriage to you goodbye. Note the "if," however. I recommend not beating her over the head with assertions that you are going to divorce her no matter what. I.e., threatening her is not the way to go.

By way of dealing with the "lease issue," you might also keep in mind that termination of your apartment lease with Candice will be a problem for you — because you will no longer have a place to live, even in principle. The good graces of your friend Andy, whom you are crashing with (I gather), may begin to wear thin after a while.

What's happening on the job front? Any news about the outcome of your interview?

—Custer

 

[specialman]

According to her, she has been stressed out since I left the apartment and they have begun having arguments. Mostly about that fact that she hasn't wanted to have sex in a little while. She says it made her realize that she was with him for all the wrong reasons. This really pissed me off, but I restrained myself because she was in such a fragile state at the time. I asked if "we" really meant anything since she so eagerly decided to leave me. She promised it was just a mistake. That is when I told her that I couldn't see myself back with her.

 

[Josetta]

She is accumulating emotional baggage at the speed of light, but wanting forgiveness.

You need to re-read the first few paragraphs of your other thread, regarding your powerful desires to become a cuckold.

If the job comes up, then take it, as this will give you the space you need to notice other opportunities.

You have been a wonderful cuckold, and a great friend of Isabella, but there is a breaking point when a cucky has to say, "I didn't deserve to get booted out of my marriage."

It is not clear whether it was the Bull or your wife who wanted you out of their lives, but they have been rubbing it in your face too much.

Don't sign any leases with your wife as this will LOCK U IN for another extended period with all the utility bills. Let her lover pay all the costs. You need to leave a "clear path" in case you find another woman to love.

Give yourself options and a full year before you agree to continue your marriage. Don't say, "yes" now just for Isabella. Her Bull needs to get down on his knees and apologise profusely (and mean it). He is probably looking for a way to leave you to sort out the mess of a hot wife who is currently stressed and moody and argumentive and likely to suffer withdrawal symptoms for months if she is no longer getting serviced daily by a big cock. You said your penis was 1 inch flaccid and 3-4 inches full erection.

Rest up, take time out, give yourself space so each person iinvolved can cool down and decide where the future lies for them. Continue to let her feel she lost you permantly - if she truly loves you, she will stop the emotional stuff and see your point of view - and realise she does not deserve you anymore.

 

[enser]

I been married for 3 years to my beautiful wife Candice. She is the love of my life. I'm the luckiest man in the world to have a girl as great as her and she reminds me everyday
I am about 1 inch long when flaccid and about 3-4 when hard. My penis has never given her an orgasm.
In July of 2007, we came close to breaking up
Candice is 26 years old. She has medium length blonde hair with brown eyes. Her body is slim, 34B cup breasts, 125 LBS, and 5'3". Her face is cute as a button, she is smart as a whip, and funny
I became very aroused by the thought of my Candice being fucked by another man
"He had me in every room...he used me like I belonged to him
That’s from your fist post. What I read:
1 You are sure Candice beautiful you love her and consider yourself lucky to have her. But
2 You have certain problems in bed and
3 It is known that Cuckolding or Hotwiving is no remedy for a shaky marriage. On the contrary
4 Very true, you posted pictures of her, she is cute but she did not look like a nymphomaniac. She can live for months without sex. And her fucker 6 Paul Is a maniac he wants her to spread five times a day and five times at night.
5 You agreed, she should try another prick but did not envision what all could happen.
Candice has learned the hard way the difference between a husband and a “maximal pigmented” bull.
If I where you, I would take her back, but with conditions. First she would have to agree to get rid of Paul, and give up her job. After that you could ask anything of her that pleases you. If you do not take Candice back, think what else you could eventually pick up after her. Sure, she was mean when she told you to get out of the apartment in a week. She did so under pressure from Paul and she hoped that Paul would be her future partner, after all he is the father of her child.

Apartment, housing? It’s a buyers market right now in the States. Look for a bank owned foreclosure and make the bank a much lower offer than the asking price. In the mean time you should find a place to live where you don’t need e lease. Times are tough and people also rent out part of their house without a lease.

 

[specialman]

Ok, I just want to make it clear that even though I do love her, I will NEVER get back with her. She made her bed and now she can sleep in it. I wouldn't even mind being friends with her, but a marital relationship is out of the question. She only makes it harder on herself by not listening to me when I tell her that.

 

[Custer Laststand]

Not to put too fine a point on it....

Kyle,

....though I do love her .... a marital relationship is out of the question.

I don't want to belabor the details, but I believe you *are* married to Candice. So, what's the plan?

—Custer

 

[specialman]

Hey guys, sorry I havn't been around in a bit. I've been seeing Candice for lunch/dinner a few times this week. We've done a lot of talking and the more I talk to her, the more I think I made the right decision. She clearly feels that she made a mistake with all of this, but I don't think I could ever trust her again. I still love her, but it's just not the same anymore. Her relationship with Paul has rapidly deteriorated, though, I haven't inquired further than what she has told me.