Husband Wanted To Be Cucked And Is Now Acting Weird. Wtf?!

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SexiMexi

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So my husband has been into the whole watch me get fucked thing for a long time. He's asked me to do it since we've been married (four years now) and I finally agreed to it.

The idea always sounded good to me but I had a lot of reservations. Such as him wanting to be with another woman which I don't want. Him getting jealous or seeing me differently afterward. He assured me none of this would happen.

We're roleplayed this fantasy for him a lot. Watched the porn. I even told him in great detail about my past hookups which got him off. So, he convinced me he'd be fine with everything. We found a guy online together who is nice and fit, well endowed, and single.

We met the guy and ended up back at our place last weekend. My husband was all excited. The other guy and I hooked up while my husband watched and touched himself. Well, the other guy was very good and I got into it. He's very orally fixated (including my booty which I love but husband doesn't do), and is a take charge kind of man. Our sexual styles were very compatible. I was very turned on by him. In fact, my husband could hear how wet I was when the other guy was fucking me.

I got lost in the sex so I didn't notice my husband leave the room. We finished up and he was gone. I found him in our bedroom waiting for us to finish. I was naked, sweaty, and had cum all over my chest. My husband looked at me and while fighting back tears said "you really enjoyed yourself didn't you." I said "of course I did, didn't you?" He said he didn't know!

I was very honest and told him I enjoyed the sex very much. He kept trying to get me to say whether or not the other guy is better than he is. Yes he is but I'm not going to say that! I tell him it's different but not better.

He's not sure if he wants to do it again. He says it was "hot as hell but difficult at the same time." OMG! He swore this type of thing wouldn't happen! Now I want to keep seeing the other guy but not if my husband is going to be like this about it! I mean, my husband sat there jerking off watching us then got butt hurt because I had an orgasm?! So aggravating! Any advice out there?
 
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What's the old saying about it being too late to close the barn door once the cows have got out?
Watching your wife having sex with another man, especially for the first time, is quite different than fantasizing about it, and some people aren't quite as 'prepared' for it as they thought they were.
Going forward, there's nothing either one of you can do to change what has happened, nor should you, IMO. But the way I 'see' it is that he needs to realize he still has responsibilities as a man and as your husband. I'm going to assume he promised you that he would fully support you if you did this, and he needs to live up to those obligations.
Of course, you may not want to have another experience until (if) this is settled. That he knows about, anyway....:p
But he's got to get on board or get off the train. Can't be having these "oh, please, baby...! moments, and then cry and moan about it afterward.

I hope it works out for you guys.
Best wishes.
 
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This kinda falls under the banner of "be careful of what you ask for - you may get it"

I can easily understand how he feels, after all thr most fragile part of a man is his ego. BUT I can easily understand how you feel.

Obviously you both need to talk. HONESTLY. The 'better' issue, he may feel it's not worth it if your experience isn't better than what you currently have, that the 'better' is necessary to continue.
 
Thanks for the comments! This whole situation pisses me off. He's literally been asking for years and he couldn't even watch the whole way through. Now I'm all in and want to keep going! I asked him last night if there's anything we can do to get him over this insecurity. I suggested he not jack off until I'm done with the other guy to keep his head straight. Have any husbands out there struggled at first then gotten past it?
 
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I posted this to a new cuckold recently and am editing it for you.
I'm 64 years old, got married a month before I turned 19. I've been a cuckold since I was 20 years old and believe I can help you with some perspective.

He now feels jealous which is one of the primary emotions that combine to create cuckold angst. Although the angst is often mentioned in passing, it's rarely fully explained, and probably impossible to fully describe. Your new cuckold's stomach churns. His heart pounds in his chest. His palms sweat. He is simultaneously excited for you, envious of him, fearful of losing you, embarrassed about what others might think of him, sexually stimulated by what he's seeing, yet can be temporarily impotent as he realizes he's not at the top of the sexual food chain.

That roller coaster ride is what most cuckolds dread, but can't, or don't want, to live without. The first cuckold experience can shake him to his core. It's certainly out of his comfort zone. But if he can't help but play it back in his mind over and over and over, and keeps imagining additional acts, the lifestyle will probably suck him in.

I don't think you should have misled him about the quality of the sex with the new guy. Think about it. He could see your response. I believe you would be better served to reassure him that although the sex is more intense, it's still just the physical part. Tell him that he was right. You wish you'd gone along with what he wanted long ago. And make sure he knows how awesome it is to be married to a man who puts petty jealousy aside to enhance your marriage. Let him know, you realize how difficult it would be to find another husband who is willing to give you this freedom?

Over time your cuckold relationship will evolve. My wife now belongs to someone else sexually. That's not how it started. But it's now what we both want and enjoy. Give him time and help him work through the feelings of angst. You both need reassurance right now, apparently him more than you. He needs to know his place as your husband is secure, even if other guys give you better sex.

Being a cuckold not for everyone, but some of us can not imagine life any other way. We dread and live for the angst.
 
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He'll be fine! You guys keep communication open and stay honest with each other. Awesome post!
 
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IndyHubby said:
I posted this to a new cuckold recently and am editing it for you.
I'm 64 years old, got married a month before I turned 19. I've been a cuckold since I was 20 years old and believe I can help you with some perspective.

He now feels jealous which is one of the primary emotions that combine to create cuckold angst. Although the angst is often mentioned in passing, it's rarely fully explained, and probably impossible to fully describe. Your new cuckold's stomach churns. His heart pounds in his chest. His palms sweat. He is simultaneously excited for you, envious of him, fearful of losing you, embarrassed about what others might think of him, sexually stimulated by what he's seeing, yet can be temporarily impotent as he realizes he's not at the top of the sexual food chain.

That roller coaster ride is what most cuckolds dread, but can't, or don't want, to live without. The first cuckold experience can shake him to his core. It's certainly out of his comfort zone. But if he can't help but play it back in his mind over and over and over, and keeps imagining additional acts, the lifestyle will probably suck him in.

I don't think you should have misled him about the quality of the sex with the new guy. Think about it. He could see your response. I believe you would be better served to reassure him that although the sex is more intense, it's still just the physical part. Tell him that he was right. You wish you'd gone along with what he wanted long ago. And make sure he knows how awesome it is to be married to a man who puts petty jealousy aside to enhance your marriage. Let him know, you realize difficult would it be to find another husband who is willing to give you this freedom?

Over time you cuckold relationship will evolve. My wife now belongs to someone else sexually. That's not how it started. But it's now what we both want and enjoy. Give him time and help him work through the feelings of angst. You both need reassurance right now, apparently him more than you. He needs to know his place as your husband is secure, even if other guys give you better sex.

Being a cuckold not for everyone, but some of us can not imagine life any other way. We dread and live for the angst.

Very well said thank you for your insight. Everything you said basically sums up what he's said to me. My question is why didn't he consider the jealousy aspect before?! It was my big hang up about doing this.

I didn't mislead him entirely. I told him it was good but not better than him. Well, I guess I did lie but I don't think he could've handled hearing me say it was better with the other guy. Now I want to do it very badly and he is hesitant.
 
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Man's pride! That's all. Jealousy is a confirmation of love. His fear is losing you to someone who is just pleasure to/for you. Reassure your love and commitment to him. Never tell him "exactly" how good another guy is...it's obvious that he can't handle that truth...
 
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I am now in my mid 40’s and I have been within various types of cuckold associated relationships since I was first married more than 26 years ago so I can say that IndyHubby provided you with some great insight as it is on point and does provide a great perspective. IndyHubby describes how we cuckolds can and do feel, the emotions, the physical response, the overall experience and the memories associated with the lifestyle.

I do also strongly agree with IndyHubby in that I also don't think you should have misled your husband about the quality of the sex with the new guy. As I mentioned above, each coupling, while each of the sexual connections are different and your trying to spare your husband’s ego by not answering his question directly; maybe you should have told your husband that in some ways it was truly better and how it was better. As IndyHubby said “Think about it. He could see your response. I believe you would be better served to reassure him that although the sex is more intense, it's still just the physical part. Tell him that he was right. You wish you'd gone along with what he wanted long ago.”

He may now think you were misleading (even lying to) him by answering him the way you had without further discussion. You should be very open and honest with your husband, listen to him and allow him to listen to you. Make sure that he does know how you feel about him as a husband and how your appreciate that he has encouraged you to enjoy yourself with another man, how he is a man whom puts petty jealousy aside to enhance your marriage. A cuckold husband which provides encouragement and support to his wife to explore sexual intimacy with another man generally can accept honesty, prefers honesty even if it is a subtle or direct hit on the traditional ego. Relationships do evolved, dynamics do change and as a couple you both will grow as one while you will have his support to continue to explore with other men if you two can get though this bump in the path/journey.
As indicated by IndyHubby “He (your husband) needs to know his place as your husband is secure, even if other guys give you better sex.“ and “Being a cuckold not for everyone, but some of us cannot imagine life any other way.”

So in summary, you both should take some time to reflect, time to have continued open honest discussions about everything and you will find that if this is something that he has truly wanted, he will encourage and support your desire to continue to be with this new guy sexually. Over time you both may find that you do prefer other men sexually.
 
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VERYFINEGENTLEMAN said:
Man's pride! That's all. Jealously is a confirmation of love. His fear is more afraid of losing you to someone who is just pleasure for you. Reassure your love and commitment to him. Never to Jim "exactly" how good another guys is...it's obvious that he can't handle that truth...
Thank you gorgeous black man:)
 
Continue to tell your cuckold that different is not better and remind him that you are still his wife and will continue to be his wife even though you need to get some new outside pleasures. Keep him trying to enjoy the sex show he wanted you to perform. Maybe from a different room so he feels it is more like a porno flick.
 
While different is not always better, it was clearly described in a way that the cuckold husband himself realized that the other man was truly taking you to a place were he had not taken you himself. Sometimes honesty is best, otherwise you are setting the ground work for deception which is what leads to many relationships within this lifestyle to fail as a result. Either way, it is your marriage, you will find the best approach with your husband and I do wish you the best of luck.
 
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SexiMexi said:
So my husband has been into the whole watch me get fucked thing for a long time. He's asked me to do it since we've been married (four years now) and I finally agreed to it.

The idea always sounded good to me but I had a lot of reservations. Such as him wanting to be with another woman which I don't want. Him getting jealous or seeing me differently afterward. He assured me none of this would happen.

We're roleplayed this fantasy for him a lot. Watched the porn. I even told him in great detail about my past hookups which got him off. So, he convinced me he'd be fine with everything. We found a guy online together who is nice and fit, well endowed, and single.

We met the guy and ended up back at our place last weekend. My husband was all excited. The other guy and I hooked up while my husband watched and touched himself. Well, the other guy was very good and I got into it. He's very orally fixated (including my booty which I love but husband doesn't do), and is a take charge kind of man. Our sexual styles were very compatible. I was very turned on by him. In fact, my husband could hear how wet I was when the other guy was fucking me.

I got lost in the sex so I didn't notice my husband leave the room. We finished up and he was gone. I found him in our bedroom waiting for us to finish. I was naked, sweaty, and had cum all over my chest. My husband looked at me and while fighting back tears said "you really enjoyed yourself didn't you." I said "of course I did, didn't you?" He said he didn't know!

I was very honest and told him I enjoyed the sex very much. He kept trying to get me to say whether or not the other guy is better than he is. Yes he is but I'm not going to say that! I tell him it's different but not better.

He's not sure if he wants to do it again. He says it was "hot as hell but difficult at the same time." OMG! He swore this type of thing wouldn't happen! Now I want to keep seeing the other guy but not if my husband is going to be like this about it! I mean, my husband sat there jerking off watching us then got butt hurt because I had an orgasm?! So aggravating! Any advice out there?


HI I am willing to help .. I am not that great of a fuck , so your hubby will be happy!!! LOL email me!
 
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IndyHubby said:
I posted this to a new cuckold recently and am editing it for you.
I'm 64 years old, got married a month before I turned 19. I've been a cuckold since I was 20 years old and believe I can help you with some perspective.
apparently him more than you. He needs to know his place as your husband is secure, even if other guys give you better sex.

Being a cuckold not for everyone, but some of us can not imagine life any other way. We dread and live for the angst.

That is one of the most insightful, cogent posts I have ever seen on any site. Kudos to you.
 
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SexiMexi said:
So my husband has been into the whole watch me get fucked thing for a long time. He's asked me to do it since we've been married (four years now) and I finally agreed to it.

The idea always sounded good to me but I had a lot of reservations. Such as him wanting to be with another woman which I don't want. Him getting jealous or seeing me differently afterward. He assured me none of this would happen.

We're roleplayed this fantasy for him a lot. Watched the porn. I even told him in great detail about my past hookups which got him off. So, he convinced me he'd be fine with everything. We found a guy online together who is nice and fit, well endowed, and single.

We met the guy and ended up back at our place last weekend. My husband was all excited. The other guy and I hooked up while my husband watched and touched himself. Well, the other guy was very good and I got into it. He's very orally fixated (including my booty which I love but husband doesn't do), and is a take charge kind of man. Our sexual styles were very compatible. I was very turned on by him. In fact, my husband could hear how wet I was when the other guy was fucking me.

I got lost in the sex so I didn't notice my husband leave the room. We finished up and he was gone. I found him in our bedroom waiting for us to finish. I was naked, sweaty, and had cum all over my chest. My husband looked at me and while fighting back tears said "you really enjoyed yourself didn't you." I said "of course I did, didn't you?" He said he didn't know!

I was very honest and told him I enjoyed the sex very much. He kept trying to get me to say whether or not the other guy is better than he is. Yes he is but I'm not going to say that! I tell him it's different but not better.

He's not sure if he wants to do it again. He says it was "hot as hell but difficult at the same time." OMG! He swore this type of thing wouldn't happen! Now I want to keep seeing the other guy but not if my husband is going to be like this about it! I mean, my husband sat there jerking off watching us then got butt hurt because I had an orgasm?! So aggravating! Any advice out there?
Hello Seximexi. By the way from what little I can see of you certainly do fit your name. I can see where you would be very pissed about the way your hubby reacted and your have every right to be put out. Most men get jealous and they should, for another stud just put it to their wife and did a very good job of it. Jealousy is a part of it but a SMALL part and the excitement seeing another make the wife cum should far out weight it. Most men know ahead of time when another man is dicking your wife if he does not make her cum then it is not complete. A lot of people have already told you that he will get over it and he will be asking you to fuck another man. That is just how it works 99% of the time. I also bet you that he better get used to it for be honest with Yourself. You are NOT going to stop now that you have had a taste of it. Now am I right? Next time be on birth control and know that your stud is clean and disease free and take his load where it belongs, balls deep in your pussy. I bet a quarter that this all works out and you are going to be a wonderful HOT WIFE. Also is that you on your avatar? If it is your for sure deserve all the cock you want and when you want it. Best Wishes okdeacon
 
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Thanks to all for the advice. I appreciate you taking the time to help me. I've been distant from my husband lately because I don't really know how to act around him. He keeps bringing it up! I'm like let it go! But he says obviously I enjoyed it so he wants to try again but if he isn't into it it's pointless. He's offered to "fuck me like he did" which means rimming and rough sex. I don't want my husband to copy another guy. Feels like not doing it again to see if we can make the lifestyle work will do damage to our marriage, but doing it again could do damage as well so I don't know! Plus, the other guy keeps texting wanting to meet up but my husband is stringing him along saying we're busy. I said you need to let him know because I'm not going to do it. Husband says he wants to try again so he isn't ending it with him. This is too complicated!
 
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Hi Ms. SexiMexi,

Thank you for your interesting posts, which suggest you are sufficiently sexual to deserve access to all the lovers you can handle. Your post of today:
SexiMexi said:
Thanks to all for the advice. I appreciate you taking the time to help me. I've been distant from my husband lately because I don't really know how to act around him. He keeps bringing it up! I'm like let it go! But he says obviously I enjoyed it so he wants to try again but if he isn't into it it's pointless. He's offered to "fuck me like he did" which means rimming and rough sex. I don't want my husband to copy another guy. Feels like not doing it again to see if we can make the lifestyle work will do damage to our marriage, but doing it again could do damage as well so I don't know! Plus, the other guy keeps texting wanting to meet up but my husband is stringing him along saying we're busy. I said you need to let him know because I'm not going to do it. Husband says he wants to try again so he isn't ending it with him. This is too complicated!
implies, however, your experiment with becoming a hot wife with a cuckold husband... although you found your lover to be satisfying, from your point of view... has not been entirely positive from the point of view of your relationship with your husband. At least, not yet.

I suggest you will be most successful, in moving your husband toward full acceptance of you being a sexually-liberated married woman — in other words, of it being your privilege and prerogative to date, seduce, and fuck other men, while he agrees to remain faithful as your cuckold husband (and actually does so) — if you first establish yourself as the dominant partner in your marriage.

A good strategy for doing so (IMO), which is psychological in nature and does not involve unpleasant arguments and certainly not physical fighting in any way, can be found here:

Real Women Don't Do Housework
Real Women Don't Do Housework

(The title of this multi-page site is somewhat tongue-in-cheek.) First, take the "Marriage Quiz" that comes up at this link. Then, regardless of how you score yourself, continue on through the subsequent chapters one at a time, listed at upper left, including the Introduction, Erotic Power, etc.

Although this site does not specifically recommend that wives cuckold their husbands — this is an important aspect of a woman being the dominant partner in her marriage — the strategy put forward by the author is likely (IMO) to put you in a greatly-enhanced position to move forward, and importantly move your husband forward, on that front. You have already taken an important first step by fucking another man in front of your husband, albeit at his request. I congratulate you for that!

Good luck—

Custer
 
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SexiMexi said:
Thanks for the comments! This whole situation pisses me off. He's literally been asking for years and he couldn't even watch the whole way through. Now I'm all in and want to keep going! I asked him last night if there's anything we can do to get him over this insecurity. I suggested he not jack off until I'm done with the other guy to keep his head straight. Have any husbands out there struggled at first then gotten past it?



hi,
yes, tell him not to touch himself till u r done.
i usually feel disgusted after i cum thinking about my gf with someone else while watching porn..
could be the same thing with him..
 
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Maybe tell (not ask) him not to come while he's watching and offer him some great sex afterwards. If you're into something a little stricter put him in a cock cage till your lover has gone then let him out and give him a great orgasm (shouldn't take long!)
 
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