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Is there a double standard?

  • Thread starterblackturkdog
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blackturkdog

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Sep 22, 2006
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this question sounds simple enough but looking through the archives and noticing a thread giving women suggestions to meet black men so I thought I would pose the opposite...

Aside from datings sites or site like this one, I put this question to the brothas..where do you go to find WW to date?

yes, it's a given that WW who venture to "black" clubs or concerts will get approach but there seems to be a bit of a double standard with the women doing all the leg work to find brothas , fellas ..what about y'all....how many of you venture outside of your comfort zone to approach white females?
 
Black Turk, love the name. I had a lover when I was first becoming sexually active who was turkish. He was wonderful. Rich family, had apt or condo here. This was early 80/s. Hea slo had thick 10 inch which I was very welcome to any time he was in the country.
luv, msgary
 
blackturkdog said:
this question sounds simple enough but looking through the archives and noticing a thread giving women suggestions to meet black men so I thought I would pose the opposite...

Aside from datings sites or site like this one, I put this question to the brothas..where do you go to find WW to date?

yes, it's a given that WW who venture to "black" clubs or concerts will get approach but there seems to be a bit of a double standard with the women doing all the leg work to find brothas , fellas ..what about y'all....how many of you venture outside of your comfort zone to approach white females?
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..........it can be tricky, going out of your way to meet white women, it makes all good sense to approach/deal/go to the places that the white women there are already comfortable and willing/wanting to meet black guys. The only other places I let some white women know what I like is at work or gym and even there you have to be careful.
Sure, there are other white women that are interested, but I won't go out of my way, without some kind of signal or show of comfort about communicating with me , because if she is the wrong one, she can make you look like a fool or accuse you of harassment.
 
it's all in how you carry yourself and your approach., and watch the targets body language.
 
White women do all the leg work because the odds are in their favor. Any guy they approach damn near will be game, but that's definitely not vice versa
 
Women have the upper hand no matter WHAT color a guy is. They may make you look like an idiot in front of thier friends or coworkers even if they DO want to bang you,or may be sending mixed signals, they can get you fired from your job,put on a Sexual Predator list,anything....being a guy I'm sure I've missed quite a few other options women have....
 
myschyfnmayhem said:
Women have the upper hand no matter WHAT color a guy is. They may make you look like an idiot in front of thier friends or coworkers even if they DO want to bang you,or may be sending mixed signals, they can get you fired from your job,put on a Sexual Predator list,anything....being a guy I'm sure I've missed quite a few other options women have....
Click to expand...

As a lady I admit that the cards are delt in our favor for meeting guys (if you know how to signal). But there is the downside to being a lady too which is un-solicitated hits from guys.
When I want to meet a guy that I see in public I send him clear signals such as a smile while locking eyes with him or purposely looking back over my shoulder at him as we pass.
I know that a lot of guys feel that they have to operate on the "nothing ventured nothing gained" principal, so they hit on every gal that comes within range. Frankly, this tends to piss me off after a while because it becommes distracting when I am just trying to shop and some guy shows up and begins chatting me up.
My advice to guys is PAY ATTENTION. When I am wanting to meet you, I will give you clear signals.
 
Thanks Nikki you helped clear up a long debate between Myschyf and me. She claims I pass up on obvious offers all the time,that I'm oblivious to what I could have easily. I've always been shy and trip over my tongue with ladies so rarely flirt and never directly suggest anything. I'm glad she fell in love with me despite my total lack of hookup skills LOL even if she does find my discomfort and confusion amusing. It also explains why some ladies at work will one day be extra friendly and the next totally ignore me.....not that I'm chasing them....but you'd think my 'thick as a brick' ways would improve with age....no such luck. I can't speak for the guys who blurt out nonsense at every female in range....they make ME wince and shake my head.
 
nikki1979 said:
As a lady I admit that the cards are delt in our favor for meeting guys (if you know how to signal). But there is the downside to being a lady too which is un-solicitated hits from guys.
When I want to meet a guy that I see in public I send him clear signals such as a smile while locking eyes with him or purposely looking back over my shoulder at him as we pass.
I know that a lot of guys feel that they have to operate on the "nothing ventured nothing gained" principal, so they hit on every gal that comes within range. Frankly, this tends to piss me off after a while because it becommes distracting when I am just trying to shop and some guy shows up and begins chatting me up.
My advice to guys is PAY ATTENTION. When I am wanting to meet you, I will give you clear signals.
Click to expand...

Here in lay the problem- too many women send mixed signals and then there are those who were raised like me to be polite so they smile or whatever and it means absolutely nothing. I know a lot of guys that won't even make a move on the ones they are really into and basically just come right out and say they want to get it on with the others just because the whole game is so frustrating. I've had my share of women and I still hate the game and feel for the regular guy that is just trying to be a good man.
 
vtjames742 said:
Here in lay the problem- too many women send mixed signals and then there are those who were raised like me to be polite so they smile or whatever and it means absolutely nothing. I know a lot of guys that won't even make a move on the ones they are really into and basically just come right out and say they want to get it on with the others just because the whole game is so frustrating. I've had my share of women and I still hate the game and feel for the regular guy that is just trying to be a good man.
Click to expand...

Hey, There are smiles and then there are "SMILES". There is a big differance in glancing at a guy and smiling as we pass through a door, etc. But when I lock eyes with a guy and give him a wide smile, it's an invitation for him to come over and say something. This is not to say that he is going to automatically get lucky, what it means is that his first impression is good enough to warrant a chance to chat me up. if he's kewl and sexy and funny and bright, he might have a chance to move up another notch, if he's a dick, he's gone.
if your a guy and can't tell the diferance between a passing smile and a "get your sweet ass over here smile" then your gonna be spanking the monkey a lot because I don't chase men, it's your job to chase me.
Nikki
 
nikki1979 said:
Hey, There are smiles and then there are "SMILES". There is a big differance in glancing at a guy and smiling as we pass through a door, etc. But when I lock eyes with a guy and give him a wide smile, it's an invitation for him to come over and say something. This is not to say that he is going to automatically get lucky, what it means is that his first impression is good enough to warrant a chance to chat me up. if he's kewl and sexy and funny and bright, he might have a chance to move up another notch, if he's a dick, he's gone.
if your a guy and can't tell the diferance between a passing smile and a "get your sweet ass over here smile" then your gonna be spanking the monkey a lot because I don't chase men, it's your job to chase me.
Nikki
Click to expand...

I guess I am lucky because though I hate the games and won't play them, I've never really had to make a move on a woman, they almost always initiate and rather quickly. In fact though I consider myself average, I find these women- regular women not low rent- fall in love awefully quickly even though we agree upfront that it's just casual- that alone is scary
 
vtjames742 said:
I guess I am lucky because though I hate the games and won't play them, I've never really had to make a move on a woman, they almost always initiate and rather quickly. In fact though I consider myself average, I find these women- regular women not low rent- fall in love awefully quickly even though we agree upfront that it's just casual- that alone is scary
Click to expand...

Spoken like a man with a strong right hand.....hehehe
 
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