I think it’s appropriate in the current climate to revive this topic. As someone who grew up in the uber racist south, I personally hate the hate that goes behind most uses of the N word, and feel unease even when I hear blacks use the term to refer to each other or if they want a white woman to call them that sexually, whatever the tone.
I do acknowledge blacks have a special right to the word however, I don’t think its usage should be with unfettered license, for their sake as well as everyone else’s. It’s part of a shared past tragedy with obvious current problems.
I also must admit that I have freely used derogatory and degrading terms to describe women both in private sex and on this site when it was requested of me. However, in my daily life I view women as equals and promote women’s advancement and empowerment. I’m sure most of the women I’ve degraded and witnessed orgasming as a result also feel something regarding their rights and when and where to use the names. How do we account for this dissonance?
Do blacks who use the N word in their culture feel a similar awkwardness even when receiving sexual arousal and gratification from its use? What would black people say to a black woman who gets off on being called a slave during sex or has a master-owner fetish? I’ve encountered posts about that very topic elsewhere on the net and it troubled me. I mean, it’s something hurtful I can’t do—it reminds me too much of the barbarity of the past.
I think the current conversation has to end up focusing on the acceptance by all of a standard of human dignity and treatment. Sinking below this standard should be unacceptable to us all. I don’t know if sexually centered terms should be included in that or not. All I know is that things like these names are sometimes keeping us more apart than together, and if I need to stop using the names I’ve called women in sexual situations, so be it if it helps us become better human beings.
I do acknowledge blacks have a special right to the word however, I don’t think its usage should be with unfettered license, for their sake as well as everyone else’s. It’s part of a shared past tragedy with obvious current problems.
I also must admit that I have freely used derogatory and degrading terms to describe women both in private sex and on this site when it was requested of me. However, in my daily life I view women as equals and promote women’s advancement and empowerment. I’m sure most of the women I’ve degraded and witnessed orgasming as a result also feel something regarding their rights and when and where to use the names. How do we account for this dissonance?
Do blacks who use the N word in their culture feel a similar awkwardness even when receiving sexual arousal and gratification from its use? What would black people say to a black woman who gets off on being called a slave during sex or has a master-owner fetish? I’ve encountered posts about that very topic elsewhere on the net and it troubled me. I mean, it’s something hurtful I can’t do—it reminds me too much of the barbarity of the past.
I think the current conversation has to end up focusing on the acceptance by all of a standard of human dignity and treatment. Sinking below this standard should be unacceptable to us all. I don’t know if sexually centered terms should be included in that or not. All I know is that things like these names are sometimes keeping us more apart than together, and if I need to stop using the names I’ve called women in sexual situations, so be it if it helps us become better human beings.
