My experience visiting adult theaters mostly dates back to the late 80's through the early 2000's. Many places used to admit accompanied women free of charge, but seeing a couple was still pretty unusual. I only remember one occasion which became a genuine gang bang, and another time where two couples came in together and played amongst themselves. The rest of the times were couples who sat by themselves, and were really just there to watch the movies.
So nearly all my "insights" come from my own experience as a sissy cocksucker, and I don't know how applicable that is. Men certainly never hesitated sit close to me and jack off, or watch me suck off other men. But it was still up to me to make the first move at each level of intimacy--stroking a cock, sucking cock, and safe fucking in just a few cases. But after I crossed a given line with one man, others naturally assumed that I would do the same for them, and were pretty direct in approaching me for service. So there were a few times where I had my hands (and mouth) pretty full for a while...
I guess I'm just saying that your wife can expect plenty of attention if she wants it. But guys will still be willing to accept a "no," even if they don't wait for explicit consent once things get started.