What do you consider sex?

[2wheel]

A few weeks ago we're watching a B or C grade movie, I don't remember much of it, but there was one quick scene, where a wife or girlfriend returns from a bachelorette party. The husband/boyfriend is suspicious. After some small talk she tells him "it was only a blow job, it's like we had sex or anything". It's one of those things your brain stores unconsciously.

A few days ago we were watching Bad Moms, again, one of HWR's favorite movies. Amy, the character played by Mila Kunis catches her husband masturbating on-line with another woman. Hubby says "it's mainstream", Amy says "it feels like cheating". Later on in the movie she cuckolds her husband with a widowed husband who goes down on her (seemingly) immediately after unloading (cleanup).

I'm a product of the early 60s-late 60s, my HW is a product of the late 60s-early 70s. Those 5 years were cataclysmic in sexual mores.

My question is. In your opinion what constitutes sex?

Just some scenarios in escalating order. Just add the words in front "Is is sex if"
1 2 women are masturbating at the same time in different rooms?
2 2 women are masturbating at the same time in different rooms and were on the phone or online with each other?
3 2 women are masturbating at the same time across from each other in the same room?
4 2 women are masturbating at the same time on the same bed?
5 2 women are masturbating at the same time on the same bed and they touch each other in a non-sexual manner?
6 2 women are masturbating at the same time on the same bed and they touch each other in a sexual manner (mutual masturbation)?
What it were 2 men?
What it were a man & woman?

Do you consider fellatio or cunnilingus consider having sex?
Do you consider anal intercourse as having sex?
Do you consider vaginal only intercourse as having sex?

I'm not seeking answers these as a Q&A, just setting some scenarios for your opinions and feelings.

 

[JonGrey]

I guess it's complicated and depends on perspective. What feels non sexual for you might be sexual for another person. In a heterosexual scenario, generally it should involve penetration, if both parties are exclusive to each other. For grounds of cheating, even masturbating on camera for another person can be considered

 

[2wheel]

The unsexy truth, the hookup culture | Lisa Bunnage | TEDxSFU

Good video. Appropriate to my question.

I'm husband #2, she married #1 I think she was 26/27. We met she was 35. She said she was somewhat promiscuous when she was younger, so were a lot of women/girls, after all, she's a product of the late 60s/early70s. Never would talk about her sexual past.

Then in a moment of weakness she says during her single years she had sex with more than 300 different guys, then she goes silent and I see her thinking. She says probably closer to 500. Her words, her estimate.

I remember a discussion we had where I tried to hide my surprise and excitement about her sexual past. Somehow the discussion got to BJs. To me that is sex, to her it's not, actually to her only vaginal intercourse can be defined as sex, anyway she starts talking about greeting a person, saying hello and shaking hands, yada yada, and before I know it she's morphed a BJ to nothing more than a more personal way a more intimate way of greeting.

Now that I am writing this I realize something, her words to me were "..........she had sex with more than.........". Now I must rethink this, that this admission just represents intercourse and she undoubtedly had (in my opinion) sex with many more.

 

[Nazareth]

I generally think that penetration must occur in most instances before I'd consider it "sex"
I should probably include fellatio as well, since it can be defined as a penetration, but I generally think of oral as more foreplay-related.

All the masturbation scenarios are just "play", in my opinion. I've played with both men and women on the phone, via video chat, and in person. I never considered any of it "sex".

 

[2wheel]

Your point is well taken, as you can see my definition is different from my wife's definition. AND different between legal eagles.


From
Sex may also refer to sexual intercourse. The definition of sexual intercourse varies by state. Various state and local laws regulate sex, such as laws criminalizing underage sex and ************, testing for sexually transmitted diseases, and sale of obscene material. For example, in Eureka, Nevada, a law was enacted making it illegal for men with moustaches to kiss women.

The following is one state's statutory definition of sex:

"(5) "Sexual intercourse" means any penetration of the female sex organ by the male sex organ."

***********************
From Legal Information Institute

(2)the term “sexual act” means—
(A) contact between the penis and the vulva or the penis and the anus, and for purposes of this subparagraph contact involving the penis occurs upon penetration, however slight;
(B) contact between the mouth and the penis, the mouth and the vulva, or the mouth and the anus;
(C) the penetration, however slight, of the anal or genital opening of another by a hand or finger or by any object, with an intent to abuse, humiliate, harass, degrade, or arouse or gratify the sexual desire of any person; or
(D) the intentional touching, not through the clothing, of the genitalia of another person who has not attained the age of 16 years with an intent to abuse, humiliate, harass, degrade, or arouse or gratify the sexual desire of any person;

 

[lnohhnvm]

what was the title of the B,C grade movie. i've seen Bad Moms, very entertaining.

 

[2wheel]

what was the title of the B,C grade movie. i've seen Bad Moms, very entertaining.

Sorry I don't remember. I checked my Netflix & Prime 'watched' list but couldn't identify it, may have been another service.

 

[lnohhnvm]

Sorry I don't remember. I checked my Netflix & Prime 'watched' list but couldn't identify it, may have been another service.

ok, thanx.