My Story. Our Journey

[Mrjohn]

Apologies if this reads more like therapy but with nobody to talk this through with I thought it would be useful to track my journey here and hope one day it becomes my wife and I's journey. Maybe you will relate to this, maybe you won't. Maybe you will respect me for being so open, maybe you won't. What I can promise is that all of this is true and I will aim to update it regularly. I hope it helps others out there too.

I am 41, my wife is 37. For a number of years I have had the fantasy of sharing my wife but I do not have the guts to raise it with her. Keeping it inside has been very detrimental.

Our sex life for most of our marriage has been lacklustre in the main and very vanilla. My wife is very shy and introverted about sex. I have always found sex quite stressful which makes me prone to either not getting or not staying hard. Even when I can penetrate her I often cum quickly but she also did so while sex was quick we were both satisfied. As a result, sex has never been wild. After kids I was left frustrated by her low sex drive and sought excitement in porn and wearing my wifes underwear for others online - I didnt see that coming but there you have it.

In lockdown my cuckold desires really took hold. Interestingly, my wifes sex drive increased as she came off some medication. To offset my inconsistent erections I bought a couple of dildos - our first sex toys. She has taken to them well and is happy to have me use them on her. As her sex drive maintained it's new increase I knew I couldn't keep up so I started taking pills to help me get and keep an erection. Generally the nights we have sex are predictable as it involves my wife having a few drinks to relax so I have become good at knowing when to take my pill. The pills gave me confidence and although I am not a natural dom I started pushing things a little with my previous vanilla wife and she responded positively to giving an occasional blowjob, using toys as mentioned, different positions, blindfolds and handcuffs - perhaps not wild for some but a million miles ahead of anything previous for us. However, while I am now able to get hard I still cum quickly, my wife however, nolonger cums quickly. In fact, I have not given her an orgasm through penetration in 3 or 4 years.

My decreasing performance in bed has led me deeper into the cuckold fantasy but has also brought out a bi curious side I never knew was really there. I sometimes use my wifes dildo's on myself and use them to perform online for other men. I am trapped between these bi curious feelings borne from my inadequacy in bed and then trying to be dominant when in bed to give me wife new experiences.

To be honest, its all very tiring!

I know I need to speak to her about it but I am terrified of how she will react. Clearly the above is just the highlights. I am happy to share more if people have an interest either on here or in messages. I plan to update this thread as new sexual experiences happen and maybe overtime it will show some progress or some insights, who knows.....

 

[johnmasters]

A lot of us go through issues and concerns such as you have and the outcomes are, I imagine, as varied as the people involved. On the plus side your wife is open to experimentation and, presumably, has not complained that you are insufficient, most probably because she realises that you are doing your best to satisfy her and make her happy.

When it comes to cuckolding, it's your wife that will cuckold you. She might do it because, at some point, you tell her you are ok with it or she just might do it because a guy enters her life whom she fancies having between her legs. It will be her decision and she may not even tell you about it. Many men are cuckolds and totally oblivious of the fact.

As to any bi tendencies you may have, it's up to you to decide whether or not you want to explore them further. I must admit I still think about the cock I sucked some years back and the feelings I had as I took his full load down my throat and, yes, I get on cam and show my little cock to any who care to look. I always hope to be made fun of and humiliated but even more viewers tell me how good it looks and how they'd love to play with it. One day one of those men will be close enough to actually meet.

If you can realise all your fantasies by talking to your wife about how you feel and what you would like to experience then great but just be aware she might not react to it in the way you would wish so do be careful.

 

[Mrjohn]

Thanks John. Yes it is the fear of her reaction that holds me back. It's not so much that she wouldn't do it, that of course is totally up to her, but more that her view of me would change.

 

[DanW_cuckold]

Thanks John. Yes it is the fear of her reaction that holds me back. It's not so much that she wouldn't do it, that of course is totally up to her, but more that her view of me would change.

This is true.. It will change, as you won't be her man any more, you'll be her cuck. Which might be what you really want, right?

 

[Stevkaiping]

Thanks all you guys sharing! I am experiencing almost the same ! I talked a lot with my wife about to have sex with other guys, but she scared to make the first step ! She is ok to show her sexy body to other man!

 

[Mrjohn]

Thanks all you guys sharing! I am experiencing almost the same ! I talked a lot with my wife about to have sex with other guys, but she scared to make the first step ! She is ok to show her sexy body to other man!

If she is happy to show herself that sounds like a fantastically positive first step!

 

[Mrjohn]

This is true.. It will change, as you won't be her man any more, you'll be her cuck. Which might be what you really want, right?

It might be yes. I can see both positives and negatives to her view of me changing.

 

[Stevkaiping]

If she is happy to show herself that sounds like a fantastically positive first step!

That’s great! I will keep working on her! Hopefully the day will come in near future! Any advice to how to find a nice guy for her? I want her to have a good memory!

 

[Custer Laststand]

.......... However, while I am now able to get hard I still cum quickly. My wife, however, no longer cums quickly. In fact, I have not given her an orgasm through penetration in 3 or 4 years. ..........

If your wife previously seemed to orgasm quickly, that may have been because she was faking her orgasms. That practice is fairly widespread. Perhaps she no longer feels obliged to do that.

When you have sex with your wife, after turning her on with foreplay (not too fast), you should always go down on her and bring her to orgasm, at least once, with your tongue. Perform cunnilingus on her, gently and sensuously, for as long as it takes to bring her to orgasm. If you don't normally do that and aren't familiar with that practice, enter "how to perform cunnilingus" or just "cunnilingus" (without quotes) in your preferred search engine.

Only after you have brought your wife to orgasm via cunnilingus should you penetrate her with your cock — which you know in advance will result in premature ejaculation (which she almost certainly does not find satisfying). To put it more bluntly: become your wife's cuntsucker.

 

[Mrjohn]

If your wife previously seemed to orgasm quickly, that may have been because she was faking her orgasms. That practice is fairly widespread. Perhaps she no longer feels obliged to do that.

When you have sex with your wife, after turning her on with foreplay (not too fast), you should always go down on her and bring her to orgasm, at least once, with your tongue. Perform cunnilingus on her, gently and sensuously, for as long as it takes to bring her to orgasm. If you don't normally do that and aren't familiar with that practice, enter "how to perform cunnilingus" or just "cunnilingus" (without quotes) in your preferred search engine.

Only after you have brought your wife to orgasm via cunnilingus should you penetrate her with your cock — which you know in advance will result in premature ejaculation (which she almost certainly does not find satisfying). To put it more bluntly: become your wife's cuntsucker.

Thank you for your help here. Probably a few bits to add that may help.

Once my wife as cum she is done. Her vagina gets overly sensitive so whilst I absolutely could lick her first that would be that. As she is so penetration focused she hates it when I lick her to orgasm without penetrating her. Sometimes I have to do this when I haven't taken Viagra and can't get hard but I try to avoid this as I know she doesn't like it.

It is for that reason that I am reasonably sure she hasn't faked a lot of orgasm's previously as he body would give her away.

Always happy to be a cuntsucker though!

 

[Custer Laststand]

Thank you for your help here.

You're welcome.

Probably a few bits to add that may help.

OK. Your added comments are relevant, of course.

Once my wife has cum she is done. Her vagina gets overly sensitive so whilst I absolutely could lick her first that would be that. As she is so penetration focused she hates it when I lick her to orgasm without penetrating her. Sometimes I have to do this when I haven't taken Viagra and can't get hard but I try to avoid this as I know she doesn't like it. It is for that reason that I am reasonably sure she hasn't faked a lot of orgasm's previously, as he body would give her away. Always happy to be a cuntsucker though!

Given your wife's desires and responses, as you've described them: you might consider starting to turn your wife on with foreplay, then penetrating her, which would result in your premature ejaculation (presumably) — at which point you would be done, but your wife would be further turned on but still unsatisfied. Then, go down on her and use your tongue, gradually bringing her to orgasm by giving her cunnilingus for as long as it takes — at which point your wife would be satisfied, presumably (and done).

 

[Mrjohn]

Here is my first update.

We had sex last night. She had already told me we would be so I had taken my Viagra in preparation (she still doesn't know I take it).

Foreplay was short as always as she is very penetration focused. Whilst I was fairly hard due to the Viagra I knew she wasn't getting much from it so I also inserted two fingers in her as well as my cock which is something I have started having to do to help her feel the penetration.

When I was close to cumming I stopped and got out a black dildo I have bought for her. It is 7.5 inches and she took it all in one go very easily which surprised me.

I started telling her how much I like seeing her taking it which is something I haven't done before. I tried to engage her in the conversation but she wasn't into it really.

I sucked her clit and rubbed her asshole while dildoing her to climax. When she was done she told me to face away from her. She then reached over me to give me a hand job with her spooning me. This is how I am always given handjobs.

Overall this was a small step forward as I told her how much I enjoy seeing her taking cock.

 

[Mrjohn]

We had sex again last night. It's quite unusual for us to have sex again so soon after Friday night.

She really wasn't interested in foreplay last night and was very quick to get on top of me, so quick she forgot to take her knickers off.

She rode me for a short while until I came and then she shimmied up my body so I could eat her cummy pussy until she came.

Sex with me could often be described as a quicky but this was definitely her just wanting a quick fuck.

 

[Mrjohn]

On Saturday night we will have the house to ourselves. I need sensible advice or coaching on how to make a step forward in raising sharing her or pushing her boundaries a little further.

I would love to hear or discuss what you think might be a good step forward.

 

[Mrjohn]

She wanted to have sex last night after a night out but I was unable to perform. This is normal if I haven't had any viagra.

She was very disappointed that I couldn't fuck her and for the first time I got her to admit she was disappointed. She wouldn't go as far as to say I don't satisfy her but it was a definite step forward in her being honest.

I also said that it might be hot to have someone who can satisfy her but she didn't really respond and then pushed my head down so I could eat her.

I've no idea if this is real progress or anything. Hell, I don't even know if anyone is reading this but there you go.

 

[Mrjohn]

I stopped this as there seemed little interest. Is there interest in this? Maybe more 1-2-1 than posting of people find it boring.