This will likely end up a long post in order to give some back ground information that I think is relevant to my questions. So I'm sorry for the length. I thought that I'd register and post after lurking here for some time now. I'm a guy in my 30's, and have been married a year. After reading about so many things here I thought I'd ask for your opinion on where things are going.
When i met my wife 6 years ago she was a pretty straight laced girl. She too just turned 30. Our relationship was born out of an affair on both of our partners. It just happened, and wasn't ideal but at least we are in the 2% that actually ended up together and married since they say 98% of affairs amount to nothing long term. Since my late teens I had always entertained submission fantasies, not to mention a few fetishes. I LOVE the dominatrix, woman in control theme, though in real life I'm far more of an A-Type personality. It has always been fantasy more than reality and never affected my ability to function in day to day life. This has strictly been a recreational activity. Early in our relationship I confessed my fetishes and desires and she was more than willing to learn, read (she read Elise Suttons book cover to cover), and express herself in these ways. Through all of this, it's clear that she loves me, and as such has been willing to expand and explore her sexual horizons. She has done a more than admirable job of transforming herself from fairly innocent and naive to one that's more than willing to act in a dominant manner and don a plethora of fetish wears and cater to my desires. In short she has been a dream.
About 6 months ago I confessed to having cuckold fantasies to her. I did so armed and ready with many many articles, lots of cuckold captioned pictures to illustrate my desires, as well as what I feel are the roots of my cuckold fantasies. While petrified I'd be screwing things up by confessing these things I felt, I was relieved that she pretty much took this all in stride as much as she did my previous bdsm confessions. She was interested to learn more, and so I gave her plenty more to read. She also found some time to find her own resources along the way. I was thrilled, and more than a little bit relieved that she didn't think I was crazy.
In our conversations, she stated pretty clearly that she loves me, and doesn't have the desire to actually go out and have sex with someone, but is more than willing to be indulgent about all of this in a fantasy type way. When I say that i mean the obvious, when we're having sex and during foreplay, she really gets into the verbal component about being with someone else, about needing someone more capable, etc. She has even dressed up in a sexy and revealing way and pretended to "go out for the night" (even though I know she just ran around doing a bunch of stuff for herself that she had wanted to get done). Through the evening she texted me about "him" and explicitly told me about all the things going on including the cream pie she was going to bring me home. Again I do know her well enough to know she was playing around and not actually out doing all of this. But it was fantastic. When she got back she teased more about what she had been up to and afterwards the sex was fantastic. Going out like that made her not only feel sexy, but she noticed the men checking out her outfit and especially her 4+ inch heels. She said it all made her feel good, and that the experience was incredibly fun, but again she had no real desire to stray and make this a reality.
Last weekend we managed to be kid free (yes we have two young children and I'm sure that this is one of the reasons why she wouldn't want to mess anything up), we were ***** and staying in a small cabin in a touristy type town. She delivered perhaps the most stunning verbal barrage to date. She said the filthiest and nastiest things i've EVER heard uttered from her lips. I gobbled every syllable up and reciprocated back as things went on. I was literally blown away by the things she was saying, and convincingly so on top of it. This wasn't just any old dialogue she had rehearsed or read somewhere. This was coming out pretty naturally in the context of the moment. This was fantastic stuff and I came 6 times in 18 hours. I can't remember how many years it has been since I've done that! What's best is that I didn't have to provoke this sort of talk or theme in the least. This was all her own doing, and she has been increasingly initiating this sort of talk about the cuckolding scenario without any prompting. She tells me how much fun it is to talk and act like that, not to mention how much fun it is getting the obvious strong reaction out of me.
If I were to be honest, if she did go out and cuckold me, I'd likely be upset, but A type personality or not, I'd likely be okay with it given the immense amount of sexual gratification that I derive from it. That would likely override any of the anger in turning fantasy into reality, and drunkenly, I told her as much the other night. She didn't go overboard in telling me how she wouldn't ever do that, but did quickly throw that in at the end of my ramblings as if to tow the company line so to speak. Other than that, she listened intently as I rambled on about all of my continued thoughts about this subject. She even added a few of her own observations on why i might like these things historically that I hadn't even thought of.
This all brings me to my questions. Most of them are just opinion questions with no right or wrong answers and no way to be sure, but I'd be interested in your experienced opinions none the less.
First, now that she has come from knowing nothing about any of this, to initiating really nasty talk all on her own, and finding it really exciting and fun, would that seem to indicate that she's thinking about this or fantasizing about this stuff independently from time to time without me bringing it up?
Secondly, would it seem as though we're getting closer on that ladder where fantasy begins to creep slowly towards something happening in reality the more regular this becomes a part of our sex life and the more regular, natural, and sexually exciting and gratifying the talk becomes?
Third, she's a good girl, and comes from a good upbringing and has strong roots in those things and takes pride in those things. That said, she clearly demonstrates to me a willingness (as long as it's private) to explore and experience different thoughts and fantasies sexually. If I did want to begin to slowly move beyond fantasy and help this reach reality, what would my best play be from here on out moving forward? She loves talking ultra dirty, and thinks nothing of grabbing my penis and asking why it deserves more attention than any of the other more capable and able men she could go find. She loves it when we take provocative photos, and she even loves it when I caption them with cuckolding type things. She also will ask me to find other captioned photos and send them to her via email during the day, and then ask what photo I liked best and why later on at the end of the day. She even suggested we go to see a dominatrix in the fall as my birthday present because she knows how much I love to play around with all this stuff as well as my fetishes. I wouldn't want to push ultra hard because I know I'm already extremely lucky to have received the tolerance and acceptance, along with the willingness (at least from a fantasy stand point) I've gotten already.
Any thoughts on my extremely long winded post would be greatly appreciated either here or through PM! I'm sure I have left out some detail that may be important. If you read this through, and have some questions, I'm more than willing to answer them in order to clarify anything. My thoughts in writing this have been jumbled somewhat. Thanks again!
When i met my wife 6 years ago she was a pretty straight laced girl. She too just turned 30. Our relationship was born out of an affair on both of our partners. It just happened, and wasn't ideal but at least we are in the 2% that actually ended up together and married since they say 98% of affairs amount to nothing long term. Since my late teens I had always entertained submission fantasies, not to mention a few fetishes. I LOVE the dominatrix, woman in control theme, though in real life I'm far more of an A-Type personality. It has always been fantasy more than reality and never affected my ability to function in day to day life. This has strictly been a recreational activity. Early in our relationship I confessed my fetishes and desires and she was more than willing to learn, read (she read Elise Suttons book cover to cover), and express herself in these ways. Through all of this, it's clear that she loves me, and as such has been willing to expand and explore her sexual horizons. She has done a more than admirable job of transforming herself from fairly innocent and naive to one that's more than willing to act in a dominant manner and don a plethora of fetish wears and cater to my desires. In short she has been a dream.
About 6 months ago I confessed to having cuckold fantasies to her. I did so armed and ready with many many articles, lots of cuckold captioned pictures to illustrate my desires, as well as what I feel are the roots of my cuckold fantasies. While petrified I'd be screwing things up by confessing these things I felt, I was relieved that she pretty much took this all in stride as much as she did my previous bdsm confessions. She was interested to learn more, and so I gave her plenty more to read. She also found some time to find her own resources along the way. I was thrilled, and more than a little bit relieved that she didn't think I was crazy.
In our conversations, she stated pretty clearly that she loves me, and doesn't have the desire to actually go out and have sex with someone, but is more than willing to be indulgent about all of this in a fantasy type way. When I say that i mean the obvious, when we're having sex and during foreplay, she really gets into the verbal component about being with someone else, about needing someone more capable, etc. She has even dressed up in a sexy and revealing way and pretended to "go out for the night" (even though I know she just ran around doing a bunch of stuff for herself that she had wanted to get done). Through the evening she texted me about "him" and explicitly told me about all the things going on including the cream pie she was going to bring me home. Again I do know her well enough to know she was playing around and not actually out doing all of this. But it was fantastic. When she got back she teased more about what she had been up to and afterwards the sex was fantastic. Going out like that made her not only feel sexy, but she noticed the men checking out her outfit and especially her 4+ inch heels. She said it all made her feel good, and that the experience was incredibly fun, but again she had no real desire to stray and make this a reality.
Last weekend we managed to be kid free (yes we have two young children and I'm sure that this is one of the reasons why she wouldn't want to mess anything up), we were ***** and staying in a small cabin in a touristy type town. She delivered perhaps the most stunning verbal barrage to date. She said the filthiest and nastiest things i've EVER heard uttered from her lips. I gobbled every syllable up and reciprocated back as things went on. I was literally blown away by the things she was saying, and convincingly so on top of it. This wasn't just any old dialogue she had rehearsed or read somewhere. This was coming out pretty naturally in the context of the moment. This was fantastic stuff and I came 6 times in 18 hours. I can't remember how many years it has been since I've done that! What's best is that I didn't have to provoke this sort of talk or theme in the least. This was all her own doing, and she has been increasingly initiating this sort of talk about the cuckolding scenario without any prompting. She tells me how much fun it is to talk and act like that, not to mention how much fun it is getting the obvious strong reaction out of me.
If I were to be honest, if she did go out and cuckold me, I'd likely be upset, but A type personality or not, I'd likely be okay with it given the immense amount of sexual gratification that I derive from it. That would likely override any of the anger in turning fantasy into reality, and drunkenly, I told her as much the other night. She didn't go overboard in telling me how she wouldn't ever do that, but did quickly throw that in at the end of my ramblings as if to tow the company line so to speak. Other than that, she listened intently as I rambled on about all of my continued thoughts about this subject. She even added a few of her own observations on why i might like these things historically that I hadn't even thought of.
This all brings me to my questions. Most of them are just opinion questions with no right or wrong answers and no way to be sure, but I'd be interested in your experienced opinions none the less.
First, now that she has come from knowing nothing about any of this, to initiating really nasty talk all on her own, and finding it really exciting and fun, would that seem to indicate that she's thinking about this or fantasizing about this stuff independently from time to time without me bringing it up?
Secondly, would it seem as though we're getting closer on that ladder where fantasy begins to creep slowly towards something happening in reality the more regular this becomes a part of our sex life and the more regular, natural, and sexually exciting and gratifying the talk becomes?
Third, she's a good girl, and comes from a good upbringing and has strong roots in those things and takes pride in those things. That said, she clearly demonstrates to me a willingness (as long as it's private) to explore and experience different thoughts and fantasies sexually. If I did want to begin to slowly move beyond fantasy and help this reach reality, what would my best play be from here on out moving forward? She loves talking ultra dirty, and thinks nothing of grabbing my penis and asking why it deserves more attention than any of the other more capable and able men she could go find. She loves it when we take provocative photos, and she even loves it when I caption them with cuckolding type things. She also will ask me to find other captioned photos and send them to her via email during the day, and then ask what photo I liked best and why later on at the end of the day. She even suggested we go to see a dominatrix in the fall as my birthday present because she knows how much I love to play around with all this stuff as well as my fetishes. I wouldn't want to push ultra hard because I know I'm already extremely lucky to have received the tolerance and acceptance, along with the willingness (at least from a fantasy stand point) I've gotten already.
Any thoughts on my extremely long winded post would be greatly appreciated either here or through PM! I'm sure I have left out some detail that may be important. If you read this through, and have some questions, I'm more than willing to answer them in order to clarify anything. My thoughts in writing this have been jumbled somewhat. Thanks again!
