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Emotional Affairs

  • Thread starterPaulie73
  • Start date
It still does not seem that she has fully come clean with you. She is disclosing what she has to, and nothing more. The fact that she would not take your phone call is also a concern.

I believe you are heading for disaster, and the end of your marriage, if things continue as they have been. The lines of communication between your wife and you are not open enough for this to work successfully, and she is not giving indications that she is putting you first in all this.
 
marys_pet said:
It still does not seem that she has fully come clean with you. She is disclosing what she has to, and nothing more. The fact that she would not take your phone call is also a concern.

I believe you are heading for disaster, and the end of your marriage, if things continue as they have been. The lines of communication between your wife and you are not open enough for this to work successfully, and she is not giving indications that she is putting you first in all this.
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I don't think thats the case. At least I hope not. Jess is the one who really wants to call things off, and has called everything off. The only reason we are still contemplating another round is because part of our agreement was that I would get to watch, which I didn't last time. I don't have a problem with them just fucking. Our sex has improved 10fold since she fucked him. She does not appear to be in love with him and she has been very open, we talk all the time about this stuff.
 
You are in a better position to know that than we are, so if you think things are fine between you I am happy to hear it. Her sneaking off with him without telling you she was doing so or where she was going, then not taking your call while she was gone, raised concerns, is all.
 
Well taken, thanks though, but she didn't sneak off, she was going to the restroom. Eugene sneaked off to see her. The situation is weird because Eugene doesn't know that I am both aware and ok with what is going on. He thinks she was messing around behind her back.
 
Paulie73 said:
Well taken, thanks though, but she didn't sneak off, she was going to the restroom. Eugene sneaked off to see her. The situation is weird because Eugene doesn't know that I am both aware and ok with what is going on. He thinks she was messing around behind her back.
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Then Eugene is being a douche bag. I think she needs to level with him, or you need to let him know of the arrangement. The more you keep things above-board, the less likely that this will end badly.

Good luck.
 
I agree he is being a bit of a douche bag but at least he's not being cocky with me about fucking my wife, but then again, he doesn't know that I know. Thats one of the biggest reasons why Jess doesn't want him to know, she fears will change, start being an asshole with me and start demanding more time with her, another reason is she can handle office gossip about her "having an affair" since no one there is in a position to talk, but she doesn't want to deal with the gossip of her husband being "in on it".

Besides, I don't think Eugene is in love either. I get the feeling he is not looking for a relationship, It seems to me he is mostly looking for the same thing we are looking for, a fuck buddy.
 
Paulie73 said:
I agree he is being a bit of a douche bag but at least he's not being cocky with me about fucking my wife, but then again, he doesn't know that I know.
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Exactly. He doesn't know you know. He may think you're a sucker, which is even worse. Your wife absolutely needs to level with him and let him know that she has a husband, he knows, and she loves her husband very much.

I am also aware that some of the hardcore cuckold fetishists on this site think your position is admirable, because they get off on the thought of being victimized, made to feel like a chump, a wimp and whatnot. I get the feeling this isn't you.

Paulie73 said:
Thats one of the biggest reasons why Jess doesn't want him to know, she fears will change, start being an asshole with me and start demanding more time with her, another reason is she can handle office gossip about her "having an affair" since no one there is in a position to talk, but she doesn't want to deal with the gossip of her husband being "in on it".
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In that case, your wife might want to add "...and if anyone finds out, I won't stop until I see you and everything you love destroyed. Have a nice day."
:D

Seriously, though, she can talk, too. And I'm sure she's more than capable of painting a not-so-pretty picture of him, should he start demanding too much. I know from experience that men ought not to start a gossip contest with a woman ;) Ground rules, ground rules -- he needs to have his position explained to him. You seem like a nice guy. If I were you, I'd expect as much. If I were your wife's casual buddy, I'd be expected to respect those ground rules.
 
What I don't understand, earlier you told about Eugene setting up a day away at a bed and breakfast for your wife and him. He went to the trouble of reserving a room, yet he doesn't think to bring along a condom so he can have safe sex with your wife? Why?? He was obviously hoping and planning on being intimate with her, so why wouldn't he bring protection along? Doesn't he care about her enough to be safe? :confused:
I would really worry about him if he doesn't respect her enough to carry a condom. Maybe you should give her some to carry in her purse so that this doesn't happen again.
 
CoffeeGuy said:
Exactly. He doesn't know you know. He may think you're a sucker, which is even worse. Your wife absolutely needs to level with him and let him know that she has a husband, he knows, and she loves her husband very much.
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Your post got me thinking and last night Jess and I stood up all night considering if she should tell Eugene the truth, we discussed the pros and the cons and in the end we came to the conclusion she would tell him and agree to keep seeing him. She also came to the realization that he wanted her pussy more than she wanted his cock so she was in position to impose conditions such as they would only meet on her terms and if he ever started to get possessive or disrespectful toward her or me, it was over.

We agreed that she would invite him out for a drink, I would show up and the news would be broken to him. Afterwards we started talking kinky stuff and she started teasing me about having a MFM threesome with her sandwiched between me and Eugene. Ever since Eugene came into the picture our sexlife has taken off. Lets hope it only gets better.

CoffeeGuy, thanks for your input.
 
You're very welcome. I wish you two the best of luck.

Eugene should be made aware that his position is mutually beneficial, but what your wife and you are getting out of it is probably not what he thinks. He is spicing up your already healthy relationship; he's not there to take away from it. Since your sex life has, in your words, taken off, I think you guys are almost there. Your wife just needs to make that crystal clear to him.

Again, all the best.
 
I would be worried?!, having sex with the odd guy is a bit different to how this sounds?!, you Wife sounds like she is behaving very similiar to how my wife behaved just before she decided to leave me?
 
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