Help, advice and thoughts

[nashcouple]

Advice and thoughts would be appreciated.

My wife and I are taking our first steps in the scene and as her first date approaches this Saturday an unexpected emotional reaction popped out yesterday.

My wife's meeting an old friend who we both know and trust. We're all in a group chat and conversation has been flowing well between everyone throughout. Until yesterday. He posted a few statements that 'put me in my place' and basically 'shut me up', practically excluding me from the conversation from this point on.

My reaction, though not posted (neither I nor my wife have responded yet) hacked me off, a lot. I've talked to my wife about it and come to the conclusion that this massive shift in the dynamic is him asserting dominance over the situation, and my reaction may simply be a response to my role changing from an equal partner on the group/conversation and though it jarred against my otherwise dominant nature, its possibly/probably a normal part of a new and emerging hotwife and cuckold relationship.

Course, it might be a red flag of a sittuation developing between us that could open irrecoverable issues, which we'd clearly loke and need to avoid, but today, and now the moment has settled I can see that it could instead just be a normal and natural response.

Prior to this incident, everything has been a headdy mix of excitement and heart attack inducing anxiety and I'm just reaching out to ask others experiences if this kind of incident/emotional experience is typical or if it is a red flag that we might want to watch or discuss.

Thanks for taking time to read and for any responses.

 

[Marcusvalentinbwcbull]

Honestly everything should have already been discat this point. You both should have fully talked things over. About what you want and don't want. What you will approve of and not approve of. What type of cuck you might want to be. If you feel it's a red flag then my friend it probably is.

 

[JimboJam]

I would tell your wife how you feel if you havent already. It may be that you have jumped a step too far too quickly? You need to discuss exactly what you both want moving forward so that everyone knows whats acceptable and what is not. I would hope if I was in the same situation that I would be excited about being shut down and out, rather than hacked off. It feels like the wrong response. Discuss it and see what your wife thinks too.

 

[Cucked Dad]

How does your wife feel about what he did? Does she support his new dominance?
If so you are learning you actually have no say anymore.

 

[devontallguy]

I will start by saying my wife and I havent gone beyond the discussion stage. In our case I dont think it will happen, but through all discussions we have talked about what we would be comfortable with. From what you have said you dont know whether you want a scenario that is purely a hotwife one or a cuckold one (or something in between). They have different power plays and relationships with the person (persons) you are bring into the relationship. I have been a swinger before I got married and when I played with couples it was always clear what was expected --- how much the husband was involved in the planning and the intimate moments. I therefore knew what was expected from me ... in effect my role in their sex life. From reading your question it sounds like the person you are bringing in sees this as a cuckold situation and is playing the bull, whilst you appear to be thinking you are more of the hotwife scenario -- this latter scenario offers you more equality in the event. Therefore it is up to your wife to say what she wants, and for you then to decide if you can cope with her answer. Are you willing to be a cuckold if that is what she wants for you, and have a guy who has the power over you and your wife. Therefore, have a frank talk with your wife. If you proceed not wanting it then it is probably doomed to failure -- I have seen first hand what happens in a relationship when one partner wants more than the other and there is no middle ground or compromise

 

[TeddyG]

Advice and thoughts would be appreciated.

My wife and I are taking our first steps in the scene and as her first date approaches this Saturday an unexpected emotional reaction popped out yesterday.

My wife's meeting an old friend who we both know and trust. We're all in a group chat and conversation has been flowing well between everyone throughout. Until yesterday. He posted a few statements that 'put me in my place' and basically 'shut me up', practically excluding me from the conversation from this point on.

My reaction, though not posted (neither I nor my wife have responded yet) hacked me off, a lot. I've talked to my wife about it and come to the conclusion that this massive shift in the dynamic is him asserting dominance over the situation, and my reaction may simply be a response to my role changing from an equal partner on the group/conversation and though it jarred against my otherwise dominant nature, its possibly/probably a normal part of a new and emerging hotwife and cuckold relationship.

Course, it might be a red flag of a sittuation developing between us that could open irrecoverable issues, which we'd clearly loke and need to avoid, but today, and now the moment has settled I can see that it could instead just be a normal and natural response.

Prior to this incident, everything has been a headdy mix of excitement and heart attack inducing anxiety and I'm just reaching out to ask others experiences if this kind of incident/emotional experience is typical or if it is a red flag that we might want to watch or discuss.

Thanks for taking time to read and for any responses.

You and your wife should have set out your ground rules and respective status in this proposed new life choice.

Her prospective new lover shouldnt be attempting to dominate you if that isnt what you want and it sounds like you dont.

I have shared my wife several times over the last 10 years and I dont go down the sub route. So it isnt a given that her new lover needs to be a Dom over anyone.

I'd suggest a good think and a sit down for some honest chat.

 

[nashcouple]

Thanks for the thoughts, they're much appreciated.

Both my wife and I are taking a line that we're open to trying new roles/avenues, particularly as we're so new to this scene and not quite sure what fits us best. Some things will work well and we'll adopt them, others we'll change and some we'll drop. We're fortunate that we can properly discuss issues between us.

We clearly weren't ready to 'assign' roles before now, but with this change in tempo and tone, it seems that we're at a decision point. Go on and try the bull/cuckold dynamic (which may / may not work for us) or pause and ponder...

The thoughts above have highlighted that and are really appreciated. Thanks guys.

 

[JimboJam]

Let us know how it goes! Most of all enjoy it, its the name of the game.

 

[toolman2c]

I will start by saying my wife and I havent gone beyond the discussion stage. In our case I dont think it will happen, but through all discussions we have talked about what we would be comfortable with. From what you have said you dont know whether you want a scenario that is purely a hotwife one or a cuckold one (or something in between). They have different power plays and relationships with the person (persons) you are bring into the relationship. I have been a swinger before I got married and when I played with couples it was always clear what was expected --- how much the husband was involved in the planning and the intimate moments. I therefore knew what was expected from me ... in effect my role in their sex life. From reading your question it sounds like the person you are bringing in sees this as a cuckold situation and is playing the bull, whilst you appear to be thinking you are more of the hotwife scenario -- this latter scenario offers you more equality in the event. Therefore it is up to your wife to say what she wants, and for you then to decide if you can cope with her answer. Are you willing to be a cuckold if that is what she wants for you, and have a guy who has the power over you and your wife. Therefore, have a frank talk with your wife. If you proceed not wanting it then it is probably doomed to failure -- I have seen first hand what happens in a relationship when one partner wants more than the other and there is no middle ground or compromise

this sounds like good advice, tho i cant confirm it myself, Good Luck nashcouple i hope Each of U2 get all the pleasures, thrills and excitement U2 r searching for.

 

[toolman2c]

Thanks for the thoughts, they're much appreciated.

Both my wife and I are taking a line that we're open to trying new roles/avenues, particularly as we're so new to this scene and not quite sure what fits us best. Some things will work well and we'll adopt them, others we'll change and some we'll drop. We're fortunate that we can properly discuss issues between us.

We clearly weren't ready to 'assign' roles before now, but with this change in tempo and tone, it seems that we're at a decision point. Go on and try the bull/cuckold dynamic (which may / may not work for us) or pause and ponder...

The thoughts above have highlighted that and are really appreciated. Thanks guys.

GOOD LUCK, plz post updates, id love to get updates n DMs from U2, i cant hardly wait..

 

[nashcouple]

Sorry all, I posted an update in a new thread instead of continuing this one. Apologies for that achool-boy error!

The updated thread is again under general cuckol chat - here:

Thread '1st date has arrived' 1st date has arrived