Is she cheating

[Csceals]

I would look at the contacts. She might have them saved under a girl/ friends name when its really a guy. Then I would call the number see if a girl answers or a dude. They can be slick

Thats very true... ill have to take a look tonight... so many numbers in there.

 

[Csceals]

My wife was a cheater for the first 10 years of our marriage and wasn't really trying to hide it. I finally suggested to her that I wanted to share her and watch her fuck, so we agreed to be up front about our sex wants and wishes. It worked out good for us for the short time we we're active. Been married 44 years to the same woman and I love the fact she fucked so many guys with me or on her own.

Id like that... but... i guess without complwte honesty itll never happen

 

[Capt. Ron]

It sounds like cheating to me based on my experiences with a cheating wife.

sounds like cheating to me based on my own cheating ways and getting busted too lol!

 

[Capt. Ron]

Tell her it's ok only if you can watch and video tape it

Yeah, just be happy it’s sex and she’s enjoying. As long as you can too

 

[Csceals]

sounds like cheating to me based on my own cheating ways and getting busted too lol!

Tell me more. What pops out to you as glaring. Thx

 

[Capt. Ron]

As in the closing lines in Memoirs of a Geisha, “...that is a story of another kind.”

 

[Capt. Ron]

Nice. Yeh. .. i see what u mean...

Funning thing... we just screwed... and we did the rollplaying with the ex... the one i think fathered my 3rd boy.

She says....
"Fuxk me Chris".... thats him
"Give me your cum chris"
"Make me pregnant chris. Inwant your baby chris"
"Then i prompt her tonsay...like she's said b4...i love you chris..."
This time she didnt want to say it... she eventually did

But she said after... u know... i dont love him... thats why i didnt want to say it....

In my head.. im like wow... ok... so everything else is true..."make me pregnant..."

So... wow.
Those paternity test results cant come soon

Nice. Yeh. .. i see what u mean...

Funning thing... we just screwed... and we did the rollplaying with the ex... the one i think fathered my 3rd boy.

She says....
"Fuxk me Chris".... thats him
"Give me your cum chris"
"Make me pregnant chris. Inwant your baby chris"
"Then i prompt her tonsay...like she's said b4...i love you chris..."
This time she didnt want to say it... she eventually did

But she said after... u know... i dont love him... thats why i didnt want to say it....

In my head.. im like wow... ok... so everything else is true..."make me pregnant..."

So... wow.
Those paternity test results cant come soon enough...

ok so the “i love you” thing is a whole other level. hmmmm....

 

[Nazareth]

I hate being a cynical asshole, but somebody's gotta do it.....

There are certainties in life:
Death
Taxes
People Fuck
People Lie

Trust your gut feeling. Always.
If it is 'telling' you she is cheating, she likely is.
You'll likely never know with 100% certainty, short of confession or some other kind of proof. So using your instincts will be necessary.

If I may offer any advice, it would be to accept it and go on living your life. All the suspicion, angst, stress, and (possibly) fighting isn't worth putting yourself--or your family--through. Don't stick your head in the sand and get surprised by a divorce, but there's no reason you and your wife can't come to some kind of agreement on what is allowed, and what isn't.

I want to ask you if paternity of your child is going to make any kind of difference to either one of you?
Has she denied all along she was ever with anyone else? Would it be a 'last straw' for you?

 

[Csceals]

I hate being a cynical asshole, but somebody's gotta do it.....

There are certainties in life:
Death
Taxes
People Fuck
People Lie

Trust your gut feeling. Always.
If it is 'telling' you she is cheating, she likely is.
You'll likely never know with 100% certainty, short of confession or some other kind of proof. So using your instincts will be necessary.

If I may offer any advice, it would be to accept it and go on living your life. All the suspicion, angst, stress, and (possibly) fighting isn't worth putting yourself--or your family--through. Don't stick your head in the sand and get surprised by a divorce, but there's no reason you and your wife can't come to some kind of agreement on what is allowed, and what isn't.

I want to ask you if paternity of your child is going to make any kind of difference to either one of you?
Has she denied all along she was ever with anyone else? Would it be a 'last straw' for you?

Has she denied all along being with someone else....

YES. always. She has denied. Actually has said me and her college ex were her onlybsex partners... i know otherwise.
She just lies.

If paternity comes back bad...

She HAS to have 100% remorse. Own up. And be honest. I want to see tears.

Unfortunately i dont think thatll happen. I think shell gwt mad at me for getting paternity test behind her back..and stonewall me from there....
Shell get her story together that im an abuser and then come after me....

 

[Custer Laststand]

She will get her story together that I'm an abuser, and then come after me.

Are you...? If so, that's not good at all. Under no circumstance should you treat your wife and / or your children abusively. In particular, suspicion... or even factual knowledge... that your wife is seeing another man is no excuse for treating her abusively.

 

[Csceals]

Are you...? If so, that's not good at all. Under no circumstance should you treat your wife and / or your children abusively. In particular, suspicion... or even factual knowledge... that your wife is seeing another man is no excuse for treating her abusively.

Im not an abuser... whatbim saying is sometimes women will say that. Ive had buddies go through divorce and that is one of the 1st things they say the ex wives say. So i agree... abuse is never ok...

 

[Custer Laststand]

I'm not an abuser... what I'm saying is, sometimes women will say that.

Thanks for the clarification.

I've had buddies go through divorce, and that is one of the 1st things they say their ex-wives say. So, I agree... abuse is never ok.

Good. So, you seem to have five potential courses of action.

i) You can hire a private detective to find unambiguous evidence that your wife is having an affair. It would probably be an easy job; this sort of thing is their bread and butter — they do it all the time.

ii) If the result is clear evidence that your wife is having an affair (as appears to be the case), you can present the evidence to her — brushing aside denials, if necessary — then come to agreement that it's OK for her to have a lover. I.e., the two of you can agree to a hotwife / cuckold husband form of marriage.

iii) If the result of (i) is clear evidence that your wife is having an affair, and you aren't willing to accept that, you can present her with divorce papers — taking into account the strong undesirability of either you, or your wife, having to raise your children on your own as a result. Also, take into account that divorce is the largest cause of wealth destruction.

iv) You can skip the expense of (i), instead use your own reasoning (and the comments of others in this thread) to draw the obvious conclusion, then proceed according to (ii) or (iii).

v) You can decide that if your wife is having an affair, that isn't worth divorcing her over, or otherwise disrupting your marriage in any way, and ignore it.... i.e., treat her relationship with her lover (if any) as her business, but none of your business.... and continue your life as usual.

Which course of action are you going to adopt?

 

[Csceals]

Thanks for the clarification.

Good. So, you seem to have five potential courses of action.

i) You can hire a private detective to find unambiguous evidence that your wife is having an affair. It would probably be an easy job; this sort of thing is their bread and butter — they do it all the time.

ii) If the result is clear evidence that your wife is having an affair (as appears to be the case), you can present the evidence to her — brushing aside denials, if necessary — then come to agreement that it's OK for her to have a lover. I.e., the two of you can agree to a hotwife / cuckold husband form of marriage.

iii) If the result of (i) is clear evidence that your wife is having an affair, and you aren't willing to accept that, you can present her with divorce papers — taking into account the strong undesirability of either you, or your wife, having to raise your children on your own as a result. Also, take into account that divorce is the largest cause of wealth destruction.

iv) You can skip the expense of (i), instead use your own reasoning (and the comments of others in this thread) to draw the obvious conclusion, then proceed according to (ii) or (iii).

v) You can decide that if your wife is having an affair, that isn't worth divorcing her over, or otherwise disrupting your marriage in any way, and ignore it.... i.e., treat her relationship with her lover (if any) as her business, but none of your business.... and continue your life as usual.

Which course of action are you going to adopt?

Question. So how certain
to you does it look like an affair occured is occuring?
And any reason for your thought?
Thx.

 

[Csceals]

Thanks for the clarification.

Good. So, you seem to have five potential courses of action.

i) You can hire a private detective to find unambiguous evidence that your wife is having an affair. It would probably be an easy job; this sort of thing is their bread and butter — they do it all the time.

ii) If the result is clear evidence that your wife is having an affair (as appears to be the case), you can present the evidence to her — brushing aside denials, if necessary — then come to agreement that it's OK for her to have a lover. I.e., the two of you can agree to a hotwife / cuckold husband form of marriage.

iii) If the result of (i) is clear evidence that your wife is having an affair, and you aren't willing to accept that, you can present her with divorce papers — taking into account the strong undesirability of either you, or your wife, having to raise your children on your own as a result. Also, take into account that divorce is the largest cause of wealth destruction.

iv) You can skip the expense of (i), instead use your own reasoning (and the comments of others in this thread) to draw the obvious conclusion, then proceed according to (ii) or (iii).

v) You can decide that if your wife is having an affair, that isn't worth divorcing her over, or otherwise disrupting your marriage in any way, and ignore it.... i.e., treat her relationship with her lover (if any) as her business, but none of your business.... and continue your life as usual.

Which course of action are you going to adopt?

I appreciate your input.
Ive kind of taken a bit of a mixture approach... meaning:

1. Ive hired a p.i. for a short bit... he didnt carch anything...
But i think she was on to me...or the timing wasnt right for her and her friend.

2. Ive confronted her of her possible infidelity in the past... which always result in denials and the cold sholder..etc... since i have no HARD proof. Ie. Pics, video.

3. Correct. I dont think a divorce is a good option unless its so obvious...if at all bc

4. But, ive also come to the acceptance of infidelity having occured over the years. Its exhausting arguing about it and being a detective...

5. Yesterday, i told her that i dont care who she sleeps with... just dont cheat on me.

That i wont bring up her possible cheating anymore...
That i actually encourage her to do it. To just let me know ..

I told her while we were making out but i made it clear that this wasnt a fantasy.
That This was reality. I told her 3 to 4 times.

6. Also. When i told her... she started using her clit vibrator... and it made her soooooo horny. She got off 3 times..wuth massive orgasms.

6. Later yesterday evening... she had mentioned wanting to go to her favorite tea house.. when she goes... she goes with one of her many gfs...
But last night she asked me to go.... which has NEVER happened. Never...
So.....

 

[Custer Laststand]

Question. So how certain to you does it look like an affair is occurring? And any reason for your thought?
Thx.

Since you are not certain yourself, answering this question would be the purpose of my suggested step (i), above.

 

[Csceals]

Gotcha. Anything in particular they should be able to uncover that im not.... besides obviously tailing her...

 

[Custer Laststand]

I appreciate your input.

You're welcome.

Yesterday, i told her that i don't care who she sleeps with... just don't cheat on me.

In her own mind, your wife probably equates sleeping with other men as "cheating" on you — that's part of the attraction — hence the denials (if that's what she does, on occasion). And, she may thus interpret such statements from you as contradictions.

That i wont bring up her possible cheating anymore. That i actually encourage her to do it. To just let me know.

Maybe your wife found that slightly relieving (except for the "just let you know" part, if "cheating on the sly" is part of its attraction).

I told her while we were making out but i made it clear that this wasnt a fantasy. That this was reality. I told her 3 to 4 times.

Good.

Also, when i told her... she started using her clit vibrator... and it made her soooooo horny. She got off 3 times with massive orgasms.

That was a VERY good sign. Clearly your wife was turned on by what you were saying to her.

Later yesterday evening... she had mentioned wanting to go to her favorite tea house.. when she goes... she goes with one of her many gfs...
But last night she asked me to go.... which has NEVER happened. Never...
So.....

I hope you accepted her invitation. It sounds like your wife wants to talk with you in a place where she can be confident you won't get upset and argue with her, since her tea house is a public place.

 

[Csceals]

You're welcome.

In her own mind, your wife probably equates sleeping with other men as "cheating" on you — that's part of the attraction — hence the denials (if that's what she does, on occasion). And, she may thus interpret such statements from you as contradictions.

Maybe your wife found that slightly relieving (except for the "just let you know" part, if "cheating on the sly" is part of its attraction).

Good.

That was a VERY good sign. Clearly your wife was turned on by what you were saying to her.

I hope you accepted her invitation. It sounds like your wife wants to talk with you in a place where she can be confident you won't get upset and argue with her, since her tea house is a public place.

yeh. I think the cheating aspect is an escape for her. I think you are right
You know the part that has started to sting more recently is when she'll cuddle up to me and cozy up.... i cant help but think... this has got to be something that she's done with him....

The other night... i kind of laid back...waited for her to initiate with me... acting like i didnt have to have it...

Finally... she jumps me... and gets super horney... we have sex like crazy. Shes bucking her hips ... kissing tongues tip to tip... just a horn show...

It was honestly like she was screwing someone else.

So... with the realization from many i have chatted with that the text is indicative of cheating... her having a boyfriend ...

The realization of this really being real and the intimacies involved.. are jarring.

As familiar as i am with her in lounging on the bed... and the rare passion she showed me recently... (the passion i once knew does still exist)...
Reminds me that another man is as familiar as me.. probably more.

Its a weird feeling coming to terms of what "shes having an affair" really means..

Its not just the sex act. Its the inside jokes...the hiding it from me, the reality that she probably joked with him about the accidental text and im such an idiot for not knowing...

Yes. I wonder if shes taking me serious on my offer. If hiding it makes it better... the cheating makes it taboo..

She has rationalized it by now...

 

[Custer Laststand]

She has rationalized it by now...

I repeat.... your wife was obviously turned on by what you said to her (in a convincing way). So, did you accept her tea-house invitation?

 

[Csceals]

I repeat.... your wife was obviously turned on by what you said to her (in a convincing way). So, did you accept her tea-house invitation?

Yes. We talked of normal stuff