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She wants an apartment

  • Thread starterkalkouple666
  • Start date
K

kalkouple666

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Jan 12, 2007
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My wife told me she wants a place of her own. She did not ask me, she told me. She says she loves me but needs some time away from me.
Any help with this guys?
 
apartment

Well help her get her apartment cause it looks like she needs a meeting place for her lover. After she has been there for awhile tell her she is welcome to bring her lover to your house to spend the night with her.
 
MY My how this life brings challenges

Really don't give us many details on what is going on between you too. For example is she sleeping now with other men, or is it a case where you been pressing for it and so far nothing happened? But the way you said she told you she just needs her space, does not sound like a happy marriage with a loving husband and wife where she just wants to have a private place to go fuck in stead of motels or at your house. This sounds like a more serious problem that would indicate she is not very happy with you. I say this often enough but will again, loving some one means you care about them, being in love with someone means that you are the other half of who they are and the same applies to you. You can love someone and not be very happy with them. Part of a happy relationship is enjoying each other, still caring about them even when you might be angry about something that didn't go your way. I suspect there are a lot of issues you are not telling and my advice is best see what they are and get them worked out, cause your about to lose your lady.
 
Excellent Advice

tuppinsinmo said:
Really don't give us many details on what is going on between you too. For example is she sleeping now with other men, or is it a case where you been pressing for it and so far nothing happened? But the way you said she told you she just needs her space, does not sound like a happy marriage with a loving husband and wife where she just wants to have a private place to go fuck in stead of motels or at your house. This sounds like a more serious problem that would indicate she is not very happy with you. I say this often enough but will again, loving some one means you care about them, being in love with someone means that you are the other half of who they are and the same applies to you. You can love someone and not be very happy with them. Part of a happy relationship is enjoying each other, still caring about them even when you might be angry about something that didn't go your way. I suspect there are a lot of issues you are not telling and my advice is best see what they are and get them worked out, cause your about to lose your lady.
Click to expand...

You are correct. Having some time for yourself should not mean living apart.
 
It's over

kalkouple666 said:
My wife told me she wants a place of her own. She did not ask me, she told me. She says she loves me but needs some time away from me.
Any help with this guys?
Click to expand...

If she gets an apartment, your marriage is over.
 
Apartment

Thanks to all for the sincere and honest replies to my situation. I dont want to share too many details here, in a public form, but we have a pretty good relationship ( maybe a great one). We are in our late 40's, married 15 years, no kids living with us. Our sexual life has been very good, we started swinging 3 years ago, that made our sex life even better, and I think it improved the marriage. She does not have a steady lover. She is what some would call a 'hot wife', she has met with 2 men (who I know of), over the last 10 months. One of these guys lives 1500 miles from us, the other one is 45 miles away.
I honestly dont think she is doing this to end our marriage, but maybe I'm being a fool. She has said that she expects to stay in the apartment 2 maybe 3 nights a week, and I am welcome to stay there too, both with her and while she is not there.
Has anyone else done anything like this before and kept their marriage strong?
 
Hm

If it don't make sense it probably is not true. Think about this, this makes no sense, she wants an apartment for personal space, then to get it she says well you can stay there too...........
There is more to this story and you best find out what in hell is going on. If I were a betting man I would say one of these lovers, and my bet would be on the guy 1400 miles away, is in a hell of lot tighter then a fuck buddy. You get her an apartment then all she will be doing is using you to pay for her new life until she gets enough trust in him to dump you. I repeat this often, there is a very big danger in having regular lovers and it is far more common when that is the case for the husband to end up on the streets and bars trying to find a new wife.
 
I agree with the others.

It's one thing to have your wife spend a few days with a lover which can be extremely exciting.
However, your wife seems to have plans to eliminate you completely and simply wants to make the transtion a bit gradual instead of sudden, solely for her benifit.

Needing time away from you probably can be read as her not loving you any more.
 
Apartment

I know she has formed an emotional bond with both lovers. But isnt that what happens ALL of the time with situations like this? And especially with women, guys can fuck anyone with no second thoughts, women need to feel connected, right?
 
Hm

kalkouple666 said:
I know she has formed an emotional bond with both lovers. But isnt that what happens ALL of the time with situations like this? And especially with women, guys can fuck anyone with no second thoughts, women need to feel connected, right?
Click to expand...
Simple answer, if you let her take up with a regular boy Friend then yes this is common and the husband loses his wife and begins again. If you limit the encounters to no more then twice with same guy then it rarely happens if ever. But even in the first case when this happens it is because there is a deeper problem in the relationship. I point out again this life choice works for a few compared and only works when the two people really are very much in love, or can't stand each other and just don't give a shit, they are to gather for other reasons.
 
Nip it in the bud.

Dont let her get an apartment.If you love her,hang on to her with all your life.Start romancing her again,spoil her,make her feel special and wanted.Its not right she wants to move out,this will be the beginning of the end if you allow this to happen.
 
Apartment

I dont have a choice in the matter, she has already started looking for a place. By the way, I think you guys are wrong about this being the end of my marriage.
 
I agree. This doesn't have to be the end of a marriage. However, if you have that kind of disposable income, I would recommend purchasing a second home for this purpose. You can deck it out over time into a full blown den of sin. Have fun with it. Install a camera system so you can keep track of the goings on. Install a dungeon. Don't forget a hot tub! Run with it!
 
Hm

From my thinking it depends on what you call a marriage. In the legal sense so long as you don't divorce you are married however, a real marriage is not two people names on a legal document. It is a moral and heart relationship. It is the joining of two to become one. Let me see if I put it this way.
  1. do you take [Name] to be your wedded [husband/wife]
  2. to live together in marriage.
  3. Do you promise to love, comfort, honor and keep [him/her]
  4. For better or worse,
  5. for richer or poorer,
  6. in sickness and in health.
  7. And forsaking all others, be faithful only to [him/her] so long as you both shall live?"
This is the traditional vows with some variation based on the couple. These are usually promised to each other. To be a husband means to be the caretaker to be the wife means to be the help meet. Thus one in function made up of two parts. That is on the road to being over because my Friend there is a reason she wants her space. In every thing we do, from the moment you started this life choice you decided to take risks this is one of them. If you don't have the balls to step up to the plate and look at the writing on the wall then this choice will almost make you nothing more then a tool of support. Yet only you know all the facts and only you can chose what is right for you. And only you will have to explain to family and Friends why she has an apartment but you two don't stay together much. Oh and I assure you at first it will be a few nights away then it will grow till it is a week then weeks. You asked for our advice or thoughts, didn't ever say you would like the answer. If she is worth keeping then you have to step up to the plate and be a man, are have you reached the point of so many of the posters, a wimp, paralyzed by fear, afraid to prove no matter what the size of your cock you still have balls.
Your choice good luck.
 
Last edited by a moderator:
So what did we learn?

Opinions really are like assholes...
 
She found one

I mildly protested her apartment idea to my wifes deaf ears. She starts moving in some of her things on March 31st. She found a place in the big city near us, 30 minutes from our present home. She will only spend the night there after working really late, or if something is going on.
I know your guys advice was strictly against this but I think your wrong. I'm looking forward to my time alone, and also my time in the apartment ( its in the cool part of the city!).
 
My advice is to be sure this apartment is in your name. That way, if the majority here are correct about what she is doing, you can change the locks and sublet it to someone else, and make things tougher on her.

I tend to think like the others on the board, something is wrong here. You are about to be punked.
 
What does punked mean?
 
It's your story

K, don't worry what others are writing here. It's your fiction story so you can make it go any direction you want. If you want it to come out that you and your wife stay married, as you keep insisting that you will, then go ahead and write your story that way. If you want to put a bit of realism in, then you will probably separate from her for awhile as she sees others and then gets pregnant by one of her guys.
As for us blokes, we are here to read stories; fiction or fact; and wank off as we try to imagine ourselves in your shoes.
Great writing so far.
 
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