I'm a wife, and 25 years old. I have sort of a problem. Recently my husband and i met a black man, and he has been hitting on me. I find him to be very matgentic, but i could never be with a black guy. I have been looking on the internet about such things and am really shocked about all the stuff with black men and white women. Are there any women who can sort of fill me in on what the big deal is?
Sort of a problem
- Thread starterej1981
- Start date
Preferences
It's all about personal preferences...
You're not for everyone, and not everyone is for you. That's as it SHOULD BE. I read and see a lot of things on the internet that I don't care for, also. Your curiosity is natural; on this particular site, there are many who indulge in, or fantasize about interracial sex. It's simply their 'thing.' There is a certain stimulence (for a myriad of reasons) about being sexually involved with someone of another racial background. It just is...
And, of course add the additional factor that it's an adult sex site, which means that just about everything you read has been embellished to make it fit the fantasy of the writer.
You seem to have already decided that you 'can never be with a black guy.' As a 'black guy,' I completely understand YOUR CHOICE. There are those who will ask why (simple answer--you choose NOT TO), and castigate you for your choice. Let that be THEIR problem. On the other side of the coin, there are those (black males and white females) who DO CHOOSE to have inter-racial sex. That is THEIR RIGHT, their choice. And that is perfectly fine, also.
I'm simply saying, 'live your life as you see fit, and respect others rights to live theirs as they see fit. You'll do just fine. No further analysis needed.
ej1981 said:
It's all about personal preferences...
You're not for everyone, and not everyone is for you. That's as it SHOULD BE. I read and see a lot of things on the internet that I don't care for, also. Your curiosity is natural; on this particular site, there are many who indulge in, or fantasize about interracial sex. It's simply their 'thing.' There is a certain stimulence (for a myriad of reasons) about being sexually involved with someone of another racial background. It just is...
And, of course add the additional factor that it's an adult sex site, which means that just about everything you read has been embellished to make it fit the fantasy of the writer.
You seem to have already decided that you 'can never be with a black guy.' As a 'black guy,' I completely understand YOUR CHOICE. There are those who will ask why (simple answer--you choose NOT TO), and castigate you for your choice. Let that be THEIR problem. On the other side of the coin, there are those (black males and white females) who DO CHOOSE to have inter-racial sex. That is THEIR RIGHT, their choice. And that is perfectly fine, also.
I'm simply saying, 'live your life as you see fit, and respect others rights to live theirs as they see fit. You'll do just fine. No further analysis needed.
Hi EJ-
Sorry it has taken me so long to reply to people. I think you are just experiencing what most of us go through-- at some point, we start to look at men other than our husbands as real, not fantasy, sexual partners. I do not know of a single woman who has not seriously considered having an affair with someone she knows. With black guys it is just the extra added sexuality that comes from dating someone so different. He probably can sense your interest in him and why not? You may be married but that rarely stops anyone these days. Most guys will go as far as they can get away with so don't be surprised if he asks you out for "coffee" (another way of saying a date). If you really are not interested in having him continue to flirt with you, just tell him that it bothers you and he will stop.
Sorry it has taken me so long to reply to people. I think you are just experiencing what most of us go through-- at some point, we start to look at men other than our husbands as real, not fantasy, sexual partners. I do not know of a single woman who has not seriously considered having an affair with someone she knows. With black guys it is just the extra added sexuality that comes from dating someone so different. He probably can sense your interest in him and why not? You may be married but that rarely stops anyone these days. Most guys will go as far as they can get away with so don't be surprised if he asks you out for "coffee" (another way of saying a date). If you really are not interested in having him continue to flirt with you, just tell him that it bothers you and he will stop.
B
BandJ
Guest
My wife and I discussed the subject last night: why is she having a black lover? we are both straight, I'm not too small (8,5 in.). She has had 9 black lovers during the past 14 years + a few white, starting 2 years after our marriage. (swingers)
She says: It is not just a matter of size, it also a matter of "music", the way her black lovers move when talking, walking or making love. Her lovers are generally very well endoved but she knows that their size is not so much bigger than a white lovers. But she would probably never get involved with a "small" lover whether black or white.
We have always been very careful selelcting her lovers, we are both health professionals and have been able to avoid any threats to her health. She always take them bareback, she is never doing anal but loves oral. On the other hand she says that black lovers are not that talented doing her orally, but they can stay hard for a long time and some of them even stay hard after ejaculating 2-3 times. There is no sub. or dom. in our play, her lovers are usually also becoming good friends of both of us.
She says: It is not just a matter of size, it also a matter of "music", the way her black lovers move when talking, walking or making love. Her lovers are generally very well endoved but she knows that their size is not so much bigger than a white lovers. But she would probably never get involved with a "small" lover whether black or white.
We have always been very careful selelcting her lovers, we are both health professionals and have been able to avoid any threats to her health. She always take them bareback, she is never doing anal but loves oral. On the other hand she says that black lovers are not that talented doing her orally, but they can stay hard for a long time and some of them even stay hard after ejaculating 2-3 times. There is no sub. or dom. in our play, her lovers are usually also becoming good friends of both of us.
ej1981 said:
When I read your concerns here, there were a few thoughts that came to my mind. One is that I was wondering if your husband knows about this guy hitting on you and if so, what is his thoughts about it and if he doesn't know, why haven't you told him. Another interesting thought is that you mentioned that you find him very magnetic to you and if this is true, this must mean that you find him rather attractive and that you are in some way, enjoying his attention.
And because of your attraction to him, it's obvious that you are having enough interest in him that you are now searching the internet for answers. And with you now being surprised to find that so many other white women are having sex with black men, your curiosity is now overwhelming leaving you with a lot more questions that you really want answered.
I just wish I had all the answers for you. I was age 25 when I had my first black experience and all I can say to you is that now after more then 11 years later I have never had any regrets and still very much into the interracial lifestyle. I've talked with many, many other white women, both single and married who have fullfilled their black curiosities/fantasies and have yet to hear anything less than having the best experience of their lives.
Just remember, curiosity is the first step to finding what you are looking for and hopefully you will pursuit your obvious interests in this black man... Where there's a will, there's a way..
