Richard,
Richard and Maria Pike said:
This is very true. And in fact my daughter (whom I shall simply call J.) has hinted around about renting the spare bedroom here at our house. She hints that living with her mother (a real fuss budget and prude) is very restrictive. I hedged on the whole thing, because I have never actually told my daugher about the "lifestyle" practiced by Maria and me.
If your spare bedroom is a critical component of Maria's cuckolding of you (i.e., she directs you to sleep there when she fucks her lovers in her marital bed), renting it to your daughter would not be practical (because then it would be hers, to use at any time or all the time), as you obviously realize.
A more practical solution may be for you and Maria to establish an agreement with your daughter that she may use your spare bedroom if she calls and arranges that in advance, combined with an understanding that if you or Maria tell her it will not be available during an evening (or throughout a night) when she wants it, she will accept that.
Richard and Maria Pike said:
Maria claims that J. already has her suspicions about our lifestyle, and that this may be part of the reason she would rather live with us than her mom. She also claims that promiscuous young women are likely to get themselves in trouble, esp. if they have self-esteem issues based on the idea that their lifestyle is somehow "wrong." She claims that if J. is headed down the primrose path to promiscuity, she will be much better off in an environment where her lifestyle is accepted and where she knows that she is loved -- not necessarily "in spite of" slutty behavior, but because of it.
Maria's points are good... all of them. She is right, in my opinion.
Richard and Maria Pike said:
There seems to be some disagreement as to whether she's acting slutty or whether she just got careless after a couple of beers.
"Getting careless" vs. "acting slutty after a couple of beers" can be one and the same. In any event, any judgement you make about this will be completely subjective so your "judgement" probably won't be useful. Even if you point out the picture and ask your daughter directly what it means about her behavior and intentions, there's a good chance she will give you an answer oriented toward "establishing her good intentions and innocence." Then, if you imply you don't accept her answer that will be a straight-line route to a (perhaps very unpleasant and tearful) fight.
Richard and Maria Pike said:
If she is interested in our lifestyle, we want to be loving and supportive and let her know there is nothing "wrong" with her.
If you daughter knows or suspects anything at all about your lifestyle (as Maria says she does, and that's almost certainly right), it's a certainty she's interested. It's also possible your daughter inherited her apparently-strong sex drive and her "correspondingly slutty" behavior, as implied by the pic you found. (There's every reason to think, IMO, that strong, weak or average sex drive is an inherited characteristic essentially like, for instance, athletic ability.)
Richard and Maria Pike said:
But if it was just a moment of carelessness, perhaps we are better off keeping our little secret to ourselves.
I suggest "keeping your little secret to yourselves" will be the best thing to do with it. Just assume your daughter is a strongly-sexual, desirable and attractive young woman, and she's behaving in accordance with these basic facts of her life.
I also suggest Maria have a conversation... or a series of conversations... with your daughter about the critical importance of her being on effective birth control (that she doesn't have to remember and/or be prepared to manually emplace every time she has sex), and the critical importance of protecting herself from sexually-transmitted diseases (STDs). These conversations should be in the context of giving your daughter scientifically-accurate information about female and male sexuality. If Marie already has had conversations with your daughter of this nature (say, when she was younger), this would be a good time to update them incorporating your newfound appreciation that your daughter is a sexually-mature, desirable young woman who obviously "wants it" and will soon start "getting it" (if she hasn't already).
You could contribute to these conversations with your daughter by talking with her about male/female sexuality from the point of view of a man.
If you try to tell your daughter in an even-slightly scolding manner that she shouldn't be behaving "like that," she will almost certainly view you and Maria as hypocrites. The most probable result (IMO) will be fights with her, and she will lose her trust in you and Maria as parents who view and respect her as a "real person" and with whom she can talk about the important things in her life.
—Custer
