I read this long ago & so glad I saved it. It describes many types of cuckolds.
Types of Cuckolds
Not all cuckolds are into humiliation. The majority of people who hear the term ‘cuckold’ believe that the husband must have a small cock, or some other physical or sexual shortcoming, making it necessary for the wife/girlfriend to sleep with others to get satisfied. But, that’s not always the case; not all cuckolds have a desire to be humiliated. Let's look at some reasons why, keeping in mind that ‘wife’ also refers to fiancé, girlfriend, or even a fuckbuddy.
The Cuckold Voyeur In some instances, the cuckold husband has a strong desire to live out his voyeuristic fantasies. This is especially true of husbands who are proud of their wives. The husband wants to show her off. Coincidently, the cuckold wants to actually watch another man enjoy his sexy wife. This can be very erotic for everyone involved, especially if she is proud of her body and wants to show if off. This has little to nothing to do with humiliating the cuckold. Instead, he lives out his fantasy of "watching." It is very rewarding to the cuckold to share something so erotic with the woman he loves.
The Generous Cuckold Husband Some men get really turned on bragging about how hot their wife is. In fact, this is extremely common. Many men love to boast about the hot piece of ass they get to "experience" whenever they want. When this type of man gets into cuckolding, it’s out of the desire to give his buddy a gift (his wife). He wants his friend to sample the same pleasure he receives from his wife. This kind of sex has little to do with humiliating the cuckold. It's about sharing the wealth, or in this case, the wife.
Cuckold Husbands and their "Slut Wives" Sometimes there’s a strong desires the wife to be a **********, or slut. This is more related to humiliating the wife. He wants to basically act as her pimp. In this case, he may not even want to watch. His fantasy is of his wife essentially acting as a ********** with several men. He may just get off on listening to his slut wife relaying all the erotic details to him after the fact.
The Giving Cuckold Husband This is when the husband just wants his wife to experience something different. He has aspirations of spicing up the couple's sex life. Cuckolding can possess all the elements of a powerful, sexual diversion the couple is craving.
The Dominant Cuckold This cuckold wants to dominate his wife. He wants to make his wife subservient to other men's wishes. Here, the cuckold wants to demonstrate control over his submissive. This works for her as well, if she has a desire to be submissive.
The Competitive Cuckold Some men love the chase and fantasize about it. When you finally marry the person you love, the chase is over. By the cuckold bringing another man in the bedroom, he is essentially recreating the competition that was lost when they married. He is now able to "compete" for his wife again.
BI-CUCK The bi-cuck might enjoy "fluffing" the lover (oral sex to get him hard for his wife), or talking to the lover while he is in action. This cuck may also participate, usually exclusively as the bottom to the wife and her lover. When a dom wife has a sub bi-husband as a cuckold, and includes him in the sex, it’s easier on the mental humiliation of the cuckold because the he’s participating in something that he enjoys (bisexuality). He may not even feel any humiliation because of being included. Some bisexual cucks may even enjoy this type of relationship because it allows them to have same sex relations. Bi-cucks could be D/s driven in their desires or it could be a little tamer along the lines of a MMF threesome. Many variations could be taking place in this realm of a bi-husband.
SISSY CUCK This type of cuck wants to be feminized by wearing wigs, make up, and women's clothing while serving a wife and lover engaged in sex. Sissy cucks may be masculine, feminine, crossdressers or transvestites. Where they fall will determine what type of play or humiliation they seek.
For men desiring "****** feminization" this may be about humiliation and emasculation of the male. Most men into this type of sissy play are not crossdressers and do not try to pass as female.
Some men may also enjoy being ****** to wear panties or bra under his business suit and be ridiculed for it by his Mistress, and cuckolding is simply an extension on this type of play where this would be shared with Femdom's male lover or lovers.
CHASTITY CUCK Many cucks in D/s relationships wear chastity devices for their Mistress, at least at times. This strictly reinforces the cuckolds submissive position in the relationship. This man directs his devotion to his Mistress by cutting off his ability to obtain erections or orgasm while his Mistress is free to purse sexual relations and orgasmic release at her discretion. Many times the chastity cuckold will take on a "service" role during or after meetings with his wife's lover. Most chastity cucks are into humiliation play and enjoy it when she taunts his locked penis and denial of orgasms while she fully enjoys the sex of an outside lover. Chastity and denial may last for hours, days, weeks, even years in extreme cases.
Some cuckold couples play "numbers" games: After I have sex three times I will let you out and you can have sex with me or get to masturbate etc.
HUMILIATION CUCK The humiliation cuck and his wife are usually heavy into D/s (Dominance and submission). There are usually a combination of cuck traits in this type of man as well. The cuck is can be very much the slave of the his wife/mistress and he might exhibit traits that include - chastity, sissy, and bi-cuck. This type of man thrives on his submission and service to his dominant partner. One of his goals is to make sure his wife is happy under almost any circumstances. Heavy humiliation is NOT for everyone and should be something worked into, like anything in the D/s lifestyle.
This type of cuck loves it when the wife or girlfriend calls him names and shames him while her and her lover are having sex, perhaps in your marital bed! For even more intensely wicked humiliation the wife's lover joins in on the name calling and begins claiming the wife as his own from here on out. The wife relishes the fact that she can completely flaunt her dominance and her desire to cuckold her husband and have sex with other men. She may be relentless in her dominance and humiliation, driving her husband deep into sub-space brought on the the mental humiliation of having an adulterous wife and having it flaunted in his face. He may have normal sexual relations with his wife part of the time, or he may accept that his wife has chosen another man to replace him completely in her sexual bed, at least for some period of time (the latter is more fantasy than truth, mostly).
Sometimes, and I think rarely, at this level of play the cuck may be in semi-permanent chastity and be denied any sort of orgasm aside from a prostate milking for long periods of time. Others may be put on a strict orgasm schedule as defined by the dominant wife which would vary from couple to couple - once or twice a week, twice a month, once a quarter...etc.
Humiliation cuckoldry at this level is for extremely secure, loving (in there own way) and open minded people. The couple should have a strong vanilla and D/s relationship in place and have built a foundation of play that both are comfortable with. This is for advanced cuckold couples only, anyone else might get their feelings hurt...and not in the 'good' kind of way! Many times the couple lives a cuckold lifestyle where this type of "play" is lived out on a daily basis.
The Clueless Cuckold A Cuckold with no idea. When you see him and his wife (or girlfriend, wife used for brevity), you wonder how he can be so clueless.
He has a smoking hot babe of a wife. She is amazingly sexual. And yet he does not question the fact that their love life is bland, but that she seems so very satisfied all of the time.
She is so obviously cheating on him, that even without any evidence, his friends give him the advice to check up on her. It just seems inconceivable that this relationship works. However there is not zero chemistry. She does love having her pussy licked, and she does not mind if he jerks off.
It is so obvious, that often this type of cuckold does not stay clueless forever. He may become a different type of cuckold before too long.
The Reluctant Cuckold This type of cuckold/hotwife arrangement is the gateway to consensual cuckoldry, yet is not quite there.
It should be distinguished from the man who refuses to be a cuckold outright, because that either ends with a breakup, or a hotwife denying her needs, and is thus not a type of cuckold/hotwife relationship.
A reluctant cuckold has not quite accepted that his wife has sex with other men, but does not want his relationship to end.
He does not stop her from going out on dates or being with her lover when he is away, but he does not embrace it either. There is a strong tendency for the reluctant cuckold to be in denial of some of the basic facts listed above.
He may remain in denial for some time. It may sort of "work" for some time. She is getting what she wants and he is turning a blind eye to it. This arrangement can come to a crisis where it will either end, or necessarily evolve into something else.
Bargaining Cuckold With some acceptance that his wife has sex with other men, some cuckolds will put out a huge effort to measure up.
They will try to improve their stamina, might try hardon pills, might try to learn some new moves. They will then ask their hotwives to give their approval, desperate for validation.
This is where cuckolds often run up against a very hard Truth: The physical dimensions of her pussy and his cock do make a difference in their energy dynamic during penetration. She cannot ignore the difference that her lover's cock makes inside her pussy. While it is easy to make light of this Truth, with jokes about 'Size Doesn't Matter', the Truth is closer to 'Size DOES Matter', and there is no denying this, either by the cuckold or the hotwife.
A bargaining cuckold, running up against a Truth he cannot overcome, will turn towards other means of improving the sexual energy dynamic between himself and his wife. Very commonly, he finds that giving her oral pleasure is still a way in which he can achieve this. She will often respond even more strongly to his tongue, for more than one reason. First, she often feels some guilt, so a chance to enjoy and validate her cuckold gives her relief. Secondly, a cuckold's performance with his tongue does not rely upon the size of his cock, thus cunnilingus can be his best bet to continue his sexual connection with his hotwife.
Watching or Waiting? Which is more erotic or humiliating: watching your wife in bed with another man, or waiting at home (or simply away) while she goes off with her lover to have sex? Generally, in a D/s relationship the cuckold has little say in this. The wife will probably be more comfortable with one than the other, and that is what she will choose or she will mix it up if she is open. Sometimes the wife is simply more comfortable not having her husband around at all during her loving making sessions with her lover.
Watching: Seeing sex happen in front of you, and realizing - over and over again - that the woman you see in the throes of passion is your wife, is breathtaking. Even when you engage in sex, you don't get to witness it - seeing a man's penis slide in and out of a vagina is stimulating enough, but when it is your own wife's vagina, it is overwhelming. And watching and hearing orgasms can be tremendously "exciting" for the cuckold to witness! "Exciting" could mean different things to different cucks.
Waiting: On the other hand, if the mind is the most powerful sex organ, there is much to be said for the cuckold who sits at home and masturbates, wondering what his wife and her lover are doing now (and now, and NOW, and...).
Perhaps the most frustrating situation for a cuck is to be placed in chastity and then made to sit at home and wait for the return of his un-faithful wife. Unable to masturbate the cuckolds mind races with thoughts and images of his wife dating, courting and having hot, passionate sex with her lover. With no opportunity to achieve release or to even feel his 'probably' very hard penis in its chastity device, the "mind screw" taking place is immense.
Your wife/Mistress will determine if you wait or watch. Much of comes down to if she enjoys humiliating & degrading you. If so then by all means she should make cuck watch. They can make you serve them wine, undress them, put his condom on for him, and have you clean them when they finish. However, if her goal is merely to get off with a real man while simply denying you, she may not want the cuck around. It's up to the lovers what role you play if any.
So you see, there are many reasons a cuckold is not humiliated in the relationship. I think you can understand that just because a man says he wants to be cuckolded, doesn’t mean he wants humiliation. In fact, most of the cuckolds I interviewed for this paper have no intentions and no desires at all, of being humiliated.
