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Accepting the changes that are occurring

  • Thread starterSoonToBe
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  • #201
STB

what is the problem here by stb's last post that sue did get what she wanted from frank but it is not wanting her that much.

but as it sound's like sue has her eye on someone already as a new lover.

and she is keeping it from stb right now.

maybe she is going to test the water first with this new guy to see if he is what she is looking for now.

and then sue will talk to stb about him and i guess we all will have to wait just like stb will to find out all about him.

keep us posted.
 
  • #202
SoonToBe said:
What she wants is someone who will want to see her when he wants to and not just on her schedule. She said she "wants to be wanted". She said that even the teasing of me during the week sometimes got old "just doing it for myself" as she put it. I told her that I enjoyed it and she said she knew that but that again she said that she just felt she's denying herself.

.


How is this possible???? Didn't Anyone See This Coming?????
 
  • #203
No need to be sarcastic Will. It has been obvious for months that there had to be an end to Frank. Sue has given it more than most would. I don't believe there is anyone “lined up“. That may mean Frank lasts a few weeks into next year. Then, well the best thread on this site might even step up another notch.

Can't wait ..
 
  • #204
peakmb said:
No need to be sarcastic Will. It has been obvious for months that there had to be an end to Frank. Sue has given it more than most would. I don't believe there is anyone “lined up“. That may mean Frank lasts a few weeks into next year. Then, well the best thread on this site might even step up another notch.

Can't wait ..

Me, Sarcastic????? I thought everyone thought Sue and Frank was a Match Made In Heaven. Maybe there were One or Two. I think You used the word "Doomsayers"????? I'm just wondering why You didn't say anything???

As far as Frank lasting. The words, "Dead Man Walking" comes to mind.
 
  • #205
I guess I finally got the last of the explanation out there such that it (finally) makes sense to everyone.

I suppose I'm no different than other cucks - in one way or another - another guy can give her what I can't - or in my case, can't give it to her quite so easily or without a lot of scene-setting such as vacations or planned times alone. I understand it - maybe I've known it for a long time - that if/when this side of her came back out, that she would truly need sex from another guy.

Far2 - I think it will all work it's way out when the time comes. After what I've experienced and learned, I think I know that if she ever wants to push things, that I will probably still resist and will most definitely have intense cuck-angst, but in the end, I know that I will support whatever she may want to try out.

I'm in agreement with Peak - that there's no one waiting in the wings to take Franks place. But at the same time, I know she's got her eyes open. What I don't know how to guide/help her on is how to find someone who might be the type of guy she's looking for. She's not the type to look on Craigslist or put an ad up on Adult-Friend-Finder or something like that - in the sense that she doesn't want to "pick the guy". This hasn't been something she's had to deal with so it's going to be interesting when she is ready.

In the meanwhile she's said that we can and will still have fun even teasing me that "I did like it you know, denying you....", but I don't know that she's returning to the whole panty routine - that came across strongly to me - that because Frank has essentially been unresponsive to this sort of stuff, that it's not something she's going to do on her own for extended periods of time.

Anway - wish there was more to share. I can sort of tell, now that everything is out in the open, that she really would like to feel more wanted. Even today - I know she would be thrilled if Frank were to text her or whatever and suggest she come by. But he won't - it's just not something he seems to want from her even if she would want it herself.
 
  • #206
STB

as i posted do you think that sue has got her eye on someone she think's may fit the bill.

or is she just letting it ride for now.

keep us posted.
 
  • #207
Dana - I said in my post that I don't think she has anyone specific in mind just yet but was keeping her eyes open. I am fairly sure that she will drag this out with Frank as long as she feels it give her pleasure and fills her need. In thinking about this more, I suspect that come January, once the pressures of the holidays are over and our son is heading back to college, that is when her desires will once again come out in full force. She's wrapping gifts now so you know where her mind is - not on sex :(
 
  • #208
SoonToBe said:
"She looked up at me and said "remember how sometimes you'd have to hold me up" and I did remember a few times when we were first dating that during some furtive and very sexually intense moments when I'd made her cum that she'd not so much ********** but that she just went limp from cumming so much - she said she had a moment with him like that where she said she could feel him fucking her but she just felt the pleasure sweep over her and the next thing she knew he was having to hold her up and guide her over to the bed. The thing she didn't have to tell me, but she did, was that when this happened to her and I, is that I remembered her pussy used to literally gush with wetness when this happened - and sure enough she said it happened with Frank"

Sorry Steve, but I have to ask! When and how did you loose it? How did it get to this point where Sue expects to, [or] feels that she has to, go to someone else to get the kind of Sexual high she wants and desires so much. And how did you get to this point, where you wanted her to go to another man for the ultimate in sexual pleasure?

Obviously, you have been able to do it in the past, because she asks if you remember. Also I have read in your story where you have got her to the point of extreme pleasure, at least as you have written it, as part of your testimony, and it is very believable, as is most of what you write here.

You 'had it' back then, or she wouldn't have asked you if you remember, You had it when you were first dating, or she wouldn't have considered marrying you. So when and how did it come to where it is now, that it seems that even you want her to find sexual fulfillment, from another man and not you.

Cheers, Harry
 
  • #209
STB

good point Harry and steve i asked becouse it was somewhat hinted in around about way so i thought i would ask to see. what you were thinking about it right now.

keep us posted.
 
  • #210
Harry,
I think if I understood Steve, Steve is comfortable like a pair of old shoes. There is a Taboo in having a lover that Steve will never be able to bring out in her.
 
  • #211
Could it be Steve. Both You and Sue are exploring aspects of Your sexualities.
You are looking for Sue to take control of Yours. I see nothing wrong with this. If this is what You want. Trouble is, Sue also wants someone to take more control of hers. Also She just needs more than one man. If She were a Man. No One would think twice. I told You That You were heading here months ago.
I'm not trying to say I told You so. But I do know a few things. You and Sue could have a real good thing going for the two of You. But I will warn You. You will screw this up. If You try to dictate what Sue's desire's and needs are. (Yes Steve I have picked up in Your writting where You have done that). I don't think You mean to do it.

Your living a Cuckold's Dream. Good Luck. Be Happy. don't screw it up
 
  • #212
Harry - I think you're looking at it from an extreme position.

What I tried (I guess unsuccessfully) to convey is that Sue would like this kind of sexual fulfillment a bit more often than she and i can work things out to accomplish. I understand it - she has to shut off the day-to-day family life she has with me and find a way to give herself fully into sex with me. We do have that and we do get our times for that.

However, as I've been understanding what I'm seeing in her - it's her realization of just how good sex can be when she can disassociate it from her home-life.

We are, in fact, planning a long-weekend away as I may have mentioned, in January sometime. That will be when I will (attempt to) exceed what Frank brought her to sexually. We're unsure where we're heading - Sue wants someplace warm where I suspect she can, if possible, maybe have a nude beach where she can get hot and horny sexually with me this time.

What i also see in her is that she remembers now just how intense sex with her was before we got married. Her remembering how she'd cum with me was also accompanied by other memories of other and earlier lovers including her ex-husband. So - as I said - I'm not all that surprised that with her remembering all of that - how she wouldn't want to feel that again from her lover. I know that when we were first dating, she KNEW I wanted to have sex with her - and I'm sure I've posted it here before, but back then, she was always aware that SHE wanted to cum - and that had always turned me on.

So, in a way, we've sort of come full-circle - in a way - to when we were first dating and she was still sleeping with other guys. I know for a fact that if she was still seeing anyone more than once or twice, that he was definitely good in bed with her. And now, she's back to that same desire - for her lover to want her and for her to want to cum with him.

Thing is, I'm not threatened by it - and to Will's concern - I am certainly not guiding her or pushing her in one direction or another. I am and will always be here for her.

Anyway - that's all for now.
 
  • #213
Extreme position?

No, I think more from an experiential viewpoint.

What I haven't posted here is that my first wife was one of the 'favorites' of the High School football team. She was 'experienced' and was my first.
It wasn't long into our marriage, that she found other partners, including my first cousin, who she believes fathered our third child.
We moved to Arizona, and she was 'good' for a while, then she made "friends" with the next door neighbor, and even asked me if I wanted to "swap" with them. I guess I would consider myself an "unwilling Cuckold" The experience I share with my present wife is recorded on this site, so doesn't need space in your story.

So although my experience is different than yours, and was not encouraged by me, I do know what it's like to have a wife that desires more than normal sex with her husband, and wants to be 'desired' for her sexuality. Had I known then, what I know now, perhaps we could have worked it out as you and Sue have.

Thank you your explanation, I do believe I understand your position more than I had before. I hope that I have not been too critical. I understand that much of this is what you want, so it really makes you and Sue a team, in that you are able to experience and share in each others fantasies.
I still find this the most fascinating thread on this site for some reason.

Cudo's on your plans for a 'get-a-way' in January. I hope you experience all you desire. We do have lake front's in Arizona, but not where it's warm and also nude allowable. The only place I know is Shangri-La nude resort in New River AZ. No beaches, just 2 swimming pools and a large hot tub. Probably not what you are looking for.

Cheers, Harry
 
  • #214
Harry

that is a great post and i do agree with it.

so stb keep us posted.

ps has sue talked about going back to panties and frank's pussy yet.
 
  • #215
STB,
Great that you will be going away with your wife. I think it is a great opportunity to remind her just what you can do for her before she starts looking for a new lover. In the throws of new attraction, that would prove difficult and her memory without this trip would be distant.

I think you should take some subtle control this time. A few suggestions :

1. Sue has repeatedly now referred back to the days when you were first dating. One way to recreate that would be for you both to leave your rings at home when you go away. Anything that helps to let her feel free.

2. Add an extra day to the break. Clear it with her work but don't tell Sue. Gives you two chances for 'last night, all night'.

3. Book her a massage on the first day. Instant chill out.

4. Go commando. Both of you.

In the meantime, it seems you are being asked not to deny your wife as much before Christmas. No panties, more opportunities. I hope you enjoy the chance to step up to the plate.
 
  • #216
We're pretty certain on a getaway - just trying to figure out where to go to. But she definitely wants some sort of beach resort and she doesn't want to do anything other than stay-put in the resort either with just a few days to be there. And yes, most definitely it'll give us time to reconnect and perhaps put me back in the top-notch (lol!!!).

Harry and others - as long as I feel I'm a part of it and still feel the connection to her that I do - that I probably won't interfere at all in what she wants to do in the future. As I said, these past few weeks now have given me a much calmer perspective and outlook on us - allowing me as others here have suggested - to let her lead and to go along with it all. So far the ride has been good although I do realize that the future may not always be so smooth. I think that may be some of her unspoken concerns just as they are mine. But as with the rest of how things have gone, we'll figure them out when they come up and try to not let them influence the present.

Peak - I like your ideas. Definite grin on the last one! :)

And for Dana - not sure what you missed but no, she hasn't resumed that yet and I'm not totally sure she will.

As my last thought here, I think what I see is that after her weekend away with Frank she's accepted the reality that no matter what she does, he's not going to grow into the role she'd like to be experiencing right now.

In a way - it's weird thought to think of what might have been had Frank and Don reversed their order with her, actually a bit scary in a way.
 
  • #217
SoonToBe said:
We're pretty certain on a getaway - just trying to figure out where to go to. But she definitely wants some sort of beach resort and she doesn't want to do anything other than stay-put in the resort either with just a few days to be there. And yes, most definitely it'll give us time to reconnect and perhaps put me back in the top-notch (lol!!!).

Steve This is a really great idea. Pick some place where You two can reconnect.

Hedo should not be Your first choice. You not going to reconnect there.

But having togeather time is a really good thing for Your Relationship.
 
  • #218
Nope - not looking at Hedo - she's not into that kind of open sex like that. Too reminiscent of swing-clubs that we'd tried long ago and had found them to be too cold and impersonal.
 
  • #219
SoonToBe said:
Nope - not looking at Hedo - she's not into that kind of open sex like that. Too reminiscent of swing-clubs that we'd tried long ago and had found them to be too cold and impersonal.

Good. That would be a mistake right now.
 
  • #220
STB

that's a good thing is it not for both.

and yes somewhere i missed that sorry.

glad you two are going to get away after xmas. and hve some you time. you could go to sarasota fla they have a nude beach there.

that might be something to think about.

keep us posted.
 
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