Courage to Face Reality

[mr.Her's]

I'm a coward. It's hard to say but very true. I've been able to handle most of the events and circumstances that have made our marriage into one where my wife is the head of our home. However, I've placed myself in a position where my wife has little confidence in me with regards to sharing any cuckolding experiences.

We have discussed the various aspects of cuckolding throughout our relationship. I remember bringing it up for the first time in my early 20's while driving her home from the movies. She asked me if my ultimate fantasy would be to have sex with two women. I responded "Um, actually I think I would rather see you with two men." That was how cuckolding became a part of our relationship's vocabulary.

For years she has enjoyed that it was a dependable button she could push with me. From her openly checking out other guys, teasing me about what she would love to do when going dancing with friends or mischievously asking my suggestions for good possible fuck buddies has lead to role playing many different cuckolding scenarios during sex. After getting married we continued having fun the same way. More than a few times my wife even suggested actually taking some further steps into cuckolding but I consistently shied away.

A few years ago, while out at one of her girlfriend's house, cheating came up when discussing someone they knew who was getting a divorce. Someone asked what would each of us do if we found out we were being cheated on. Being the only guy there I was asked first.

I answered: "I would stay. I'd be hurt but I would stay."

Her friend said: "Really? You wouldn't think of leaving?"

I followed: "I mean, you never know until you're in the situation but we've been together so long that I wouldn't want break up. I probably would want to figure out what happened and fix what needed to be fixed."

When asked my wife's response was pretty straight forward: "He wouldn't do it. It's not in him to."

Later that week we were in the kitchen and she was talking about going out dancing with her friends Friday night. The words just came out of my mouth: "I know I've sent different vibes about it but if you ever wanted to spend time with another guy I want you to know that I'll understand. Even if you don't want to tell me because of how inconsistent I've been about the reality of it all."

She smiled, softly nodded and said: "I know. I'd want to tell you about. I'd prefer to do it front of you because I think it would be fun but I'm not sure you could handle it either."

Since then there have been times that I was sure she was seeing other people. There was a good year I was convinced she was seeing a guy from work who is a former state police sergeant and financially well off. They travel together for conferences throughout the year.

She had made a point of telling me how many women at work found him attractive but when I asked her she would blow off my question and seem disinterested. It got me even more curious when she would show pictures from work but he was never in them. Sometimes when she would push my cucky buttons she teased me about having no problem sucking a cute cop's dick to get us out of a ticket just because: "I know you don't like the police and are a little scared of them."

She even casually mentioned one of her trips with him where he was trying to get her mad by asking for her phone number in front of one of their friends. He said: "Oh that's right, we wouldn't want to upset your husband." She didn't like the challenge, grabbed his phone and punched in her number. She ended the story by telling me: "But he's no one you need to think about." I'm not sure what I was supposed to make of any of it but I followed her advice and chalked up the rest to an overactive imagination.

She has continued to suggest doing things together like going to a club so I can watch her dance and flirt with other men. I'm still unsure I can handle it but I feel like this is something she wants and I'm putting all the responsibility of cuckolding on her. It's not fair. She should be able to enjoy something I introduced to her years ago without worrying about me.

I don't know why I can't get the guts to follow through. Maybe it's the same reason why I wouldn't say anything when guys in high school would make crude comments about my wife (then girlfriend) like "Yeah, I'd bang her." I was offended but didn't make a big stink out of it. Once a few coworkers wanted to bet on a company run we had coming up. One guy said "How much should we bet for?" The other responed "Fuck the money. I want his wife to blow me if I win." They laughed their asses off. I just tried to change the conversation. Sometimes I've felt like there was something about me that brought out those actions from other guys and not really do anything about it.

I feel like it's the same reason I would rather my wife see guys without me knowing rather than see it myself or even hear about it — I'm a coward.

 

[QUEEN LINDA'S cucky]

well, are you a coward or a coward to get cucked? i would say, to get cucked, at least thats how i read your story. sounds like you want your wife to cuck you but you're afraid of the unknown. i was a little nervous at first as we started out with me being in massachusetts and my wife visting in oklahoma... long story short, she got loney and kissed a guy in a bar one night. thats how it started for us...

 

[DomBullxxx]

Here's my unsolicited advice. First decide what you want. Then decide if you could handle losing your marriage. That could happen there's always that possibility. You sound like a man that is somewhat emotionally paralyzed. I don't think from what I read that you can handle this. That's ok most men can't. I would suggest just role-play and fAntaay for you guys. It sounds like you love your wife. Don't ruin that. But spice it up with some sexy talk. Even make up pretend scenarios to spice things up. Just my two cents.
Sent from my iPhone

 

[DomBullxxx]

That mystery word is fantasy

 

[jelous_of_wifes_bf]

I wouldn’t feel bad about shying away when people say crude things about your wife, there’s no real reason to raise a big stink about it, she’s hot and people realize that, it’s fine. It sounds like what you really want is to know the truth about whether she has/is sleeping with other men and my guess is that the best way to find that out would be to ask her point blank. No need to be afraid of whatever answer she might give you either, it won’t change your relationship unless you change because of it.

 

[Susan's Slave]

What exactly are you and your wife afraid of if she were to flirt with another man? It does not sound like you would want to fight with him from what you have said, so would you throw a hissy fit at your wife?

From what you have said, I would suspect that your wife has probably been cucking you for years. You need to make a decision and stand by it because you are right, this is very unfair to your better half.

Either grow a pair and tell her you absolutely do not want her to have sex with other men, or slide into a pretty little pair of panties and tell your wife that you are not man enough to make a decision and she should feel free to wear the pants in the family and screw whoever she wants.

 

[mr.Her's]

First, thank you all for taking the time to respond thoughtfully.

What I would like is to be able to move forward and not looking back or second guessing. For me that would mean talking to my wife and saying:

1. "I want to be involved in any relationships you may have. At the very least knowing about them." How that would be done I would leave to her discretion.

or

2. "I don't think I can ever be comfortable with this but I want to find ways to safely continue exploring the fantasy but keep it at that." Maybe that would be taking her dancing so she can flirt, dance — maybe — kiss other men but not go any further. She finds cuckolding at least as fun as I do so I don't want to take away something we share. I can at least make the effort to indulge an ongoing suggestion of hers that wouldn't be 'going all the way' while still providing a lot of fantasy material for us at home.

If she has cuckolded me in the past, well... I thought about this and — so what? She has clearly chosen to stay with me. I know she loves me as much as I love her. So if she has in the past it clearly has not effected us. If one day she chooses to tell me about it, that's fine. I'll accept it because I know who we are and how we feel about each other. My interest is in moving forward and not allowing fears (justified and unjustified) to keep me from being happy and honest with the person I trust my life with.

 

[Susan's Slave]

Gotta disagree with Mac on this one. I do not think many women when confronted with cheating would say, "I'm so glad you found out, I've always wanted to bang other guys while you watch."

My advise, and I will be gentler this time, is that you keep this an unfulfilled fantasy. I do not think you have the emotional strength, or the trust (in you or her), to try this lifestyle. You can still imagine it while masturbating or making love to your wife, maybe even talk a little about it, but don't do it.

If she is cheating on you now, trust Jack when he said, "You can't handle the truth!"

 

[Lamont]

Agreed with all the folks that suggest you may not be ready. It took me a long time to be ready too, and even then I had some serious doubts about whether my fantasies could ever really be handled as realities. In the end I'm pretty happy we moved forward even with some initial hiccups. But if you've got some doubts as it sounds lime you do, it's best to must keep this a sexy bedroom play scenario. As Greymaster is always fond of saying, the greatest sex organ is between your ears. You can still have lots of pretend fun. Best luck!

 

[Saraha]

Read hundreds of cuckold stories on the internet and imagine you are the cuckold in the story - and if you find yourself being drawn into the web, you will notice that you will actually undergo a personality change - into becoming a full-throated cuckold, not a wannabe, and you will act in a way that lets your wife feel that even if she tells you the truth, you will never get upset. She will notice how devoted you are to ensuring she has all the things she needs for a comfortable life. She is more likely to tell you her secrets if she realises you are mentally ready to hear the truth.

 

[mr.Her's]

What I Believed VS. The Truth

There is what we want to believe.

Then there is the truth that we deny because it interferes with what we want to believe.

What I wanted to believe is that when my wife and I had the conversation a few years ago:

"I know I've sent different vibes about it but if you ever wanted to spend time with another guy I want you to know that I'll understand. Even if you don't want to tell me because of how inconsistent I've been about the reality of it all."

She smiled, softly nodded and said: "I know. I'd want to tell you about. I'd prefer to do it front of you because I think it would be fun but I'm not sure you could handle it either."

I thought that somehow she wouldn't really take the opportunity. That she would appreciate how selfless I was being and wait patiently until she sensed I was really ready.

The truth is that's NOT what happened.

The truth is that my wife has been with other men in the past three years. I chose not to believe it.

I chose to ignore what I saw.

• The increased travel for work. (Up to 6 times a year. sometimes for up to a week.)
  
• The late nights at work and inconsistent work schedule.
  
• Going out with friends more and hanging out in different social circles.
  
• Buying new clothes and jewlery.
  
• Excercising more often.
  
• Demanding to try specific things when we have sex like:
  "I want to do it on the stairs and I want you to go as hard as you can and for as long as you can. — Where a condom."
  
• Watching her look off in another direction, distracted, while having sex after I've initiated.
  
• Coming home several times smelling like cologne.

But these are just clues that you can get from most internet lists that give you "The Tell Tale Signs Your Spouse Is Cheating."

My big truth came this weekend when, after thinking about it, I decided to talk to my wife about the topic of cuckolding. I broke the conversation by talking about a trip she went on last fall. I was going to go with her on this trip but got really sick a few days before and had to cancel. My wife went without me. I had a knot in my stomach one night that she didn't call before bed that she was with someone else.

So I asked her: "Hey, you know what's funny. Remeber when you went away last November and I couldn't go? There was one night that I was sure you were with someone else."

Her response: "Sweetie we wouldn't do that to you when you're sick. It just doesn't feel right. Like kicking a puppy."

My answer: "Oh — ok." and I have been in a slight stupor up until now.

So I KNOW it has happened. Will likely continue to happen. I just don't know when or with who. I still don't know that I want to. I'm still thinking of ducking my head back in the sand. Now more than ever.

 

[Custer Laststand]

Mr. Her's,

Good screen name, BTW... I like it.

There is what we want to believe, and there is the truth that we deny because it interferes with what we want to believe.

This is called cognitive dissonance. It means denial of, or refusal to consider, solid evidence because it contradicts something one strongly wants to believe. It's seen often in individuals and on a nationwide scale, as well as in other countries and internationally. Broadly speaking (IMO), it accounts for the frequent political success of what can reasonably be described as "the big lie" (or "big lies," plural).

What I wanted to believe is that when my wife and I had the conversation a few years ago....

For purposes of coming to grips with reality, it works best (IMO) to try to set aside what one "wants to believe" and, instead, think objectively in terms of what solid evidence is showing you to be true. Doing this requires accepting... indeed, insisting on... "the truth" being things that can be verified. As you obviously understand, that isn't always easy to do.

I thought that somehow my wife wouldn't really take the opportunity. That she would appreciate how selfless I was being, and wait patiently until she sensed I was really ready.

That, almost certainly, was a bad assumption. Once you gave your wife permission to seek lovers, her focus would have been on identifying a man she felt strongly attracted to and who would be likely to respond sexually to her flirting. Such men would not have been "everywhere," so this step would probably have taken some time. In other words, your wife would have taken a lover when she was ready, not when she sensed you were ready... which, for all she knew, might be never.

The truth is, that's NOT what happened.

Not surprisingly...

Rather, the truth is, my wife has been with other men during the past three years. I chose not to believe it. I chose to ignore what I saw.

Cognitive dissonance...

My big truth came this weekend when, after thinking about it, I decided to talk to my wife about the topic of cuckolding. I broke [opened?] the conversation by talking about a trip she went on last fall. I was going to go with her on this trip but got really sick a few days before and had to cancel. My wife went without me. I had a knot in my stomach one night that she didn't call before bed, [thinking] she was with someone else. So [this last weekend] I asked her: "Hey, you know what's funny? Remember when you went away last November and I couldn't go? There was one night that I was sure you were with someone else." Her response: "Sweetie, we wouldn't do that to you when you were sick. It just [wouldn't have felt] right. Like kicking a puppy."

Hm... evidently there are two things you can conclude from your wife's reply. (i) Her use of the word "we" implies she has a lover (unless she used the papal "we" meaning "her"). (ii) Your wife's lover is a man who was on the same trip (a business trip? a trip for pleasure with your social group?) you were planning to accompany her on before you got sick. This knowledge should enable you to narrow the field of men who are candidates to be your wife's lover (or one of them).

Your wife's "Sweetie..." and subsequent sentence, BTW, fits well with her view of you as implied by your screen name. Nice...

My answer: "Oh — ok." I have been in a slight stupor up until now [i.e., since then?]. I KNOW "it" [my wife has fucked at least one other man] has happened and that will likely continue to happen.

Yes, you seem to have drawn the right conclusion...

I just don't know when or with whom. I still don't know that I want to. I'm still thinking of ducking my head back in the sand, now more than ever.

Why feel it's abnormal for your wife to enjoy the pleasures of a variety of lovers in addition to enjoying the pleasures and advantages of her marriage to you? Why not read

Susan Gower on natural cuckolding of husbands by married women:
The Science of Cuckoldry Cuckold Couple and:

Dr. Cherry Lee on the cuckold husband / hotwife phenomenon:
The Cuckold Phenomena Cuckold Couple

and suggest these articles to your wife as well, and give her, as a gift, a copy of Ley's hardcover book:

Insatiable Wives Blog (David Ley): cuckolding, hotwifing, history, and science:
Insatiable Wives Blog

(which you would also find erotic and interesting, I'm sure) as a gift?

Perhaps this would help you and your wife move toward a view that her cuckolding of you is a natural feature of marriage, something your wife should expect to do (as she is, evidently) and you should accept? Perhaps this would help the two of you to bring it out in the open, so she can discuss her dates and extramarital sexual experiences with you such that it enhances eroticism within your marriage?

—Custer

 

[Jaxunman]

Custer, my compliments on your last post breaking things down for Mr.Hers. IMO, you have done him a great service by helping explain to him what he seems to be feeling.

I would, however, disagree with advising him or his wife to read material that in anyway attempts to make either of them think that their relationship is normal. Mr. Hers wife needs to truly understand how rare a find her husband is by wanting her to experience sexual intimacy outside the marital framework. True, Mr. Hers seems to still be a bit on the fence, but he will soon realize that his wife is still coming home to her life with him regardless of the outside sexual experiences she may be having. His wife has probably already realized she has something special with Mr. Hers and that it is more than she could ever imagine. To try and normalize all this in her mind now, would only make her view her husband as less rare than he really is and give her the false impression that he could be easily replaced.

By pretending not to know of his wife's activities, Mr. Hers is even more of a gem to his wife in many ways. She doesn't have to include him and perform for him, she doesn't have to worry whether he likes or dislikes her choice of lovers, and she doesn't have to replay all the details to him upon returning home.

 

[duke9555]

Custer, my compliments on your last post breaking things down for Mr.Hers. IMO, you have done him a great service by helping explain to him what he seems to be feeling.

I would, however, disagree with advising him or his wife to read material that in anyway attempts to make either of them think that their relationship is normal. Mr. Hers wife needs to truly understand how rare a find her husband is by wanting her to experience sexual intimacy outside the marital framework. True, Mr. Hers seems to still be a bit on the fence, but he will soon realize that his wife is still coming home to her life with him regardless of the outside sexual experiences she may be having. His wife has probably already realized she has something special with Mr. Hers and that it is more than she could ever imagine. To try and normalize all this in her mind now, would only make her view her husband as less rare than he really is and give her the false impression that he could be easily replaced.

By pretending not to know of his wife's activities, Mr. Hers is even more of a gem to his wife in many ways. She doesn't have to include him and perform for him, she doesn't have to worry whether he likes or dislikes her choice of lovers, and she doesn't have to replay all the details to him upon returning home.

=========


plenty of cuck-fish in the sea Jax

 

[mr.Her's]

Excitement and Anxiety

I've wrestled with this for so long that I know what it does to me. The anxiety of being in competition for my wife's time, attention and affection is almost physically painful. Then there are many other times when I can't help but be in awe of this woman who I knew since we were teenagers. To see her succeed in different areas of life (She has a PhD). To see her embrace her femininity and sexuality while advancing professionally. She does this all while still being very compassionate. It's not a surprise that she takes the lead in the decisions of our home and why I'm so eager to follow.

Hm... evidently there are two things you can conclude from your wife's reply. (i) Her use of the word "we" implies she has a lover (unless she used the papal "we" meaning "her"). (ii) Your wife's lover is a man who was on the same trip (a business trip? a trip for pleasure with your social group?) you were planning to accompany her on before you got sick. This knowledge should enable you to narrow the field of men who are candidates to be your wife's lover (or one of them).

I'm certain of the man she's seeing. At her college there is a former police sergeant who retired young and is now teaching in the same department as my wife. He's tall, in his early forties, italian and in good shape (FYI: My wife and I are hispanic in our mid 30's). My wife has described him in the past as being confident to cocky but very respectful to her. (I can't believe I ignored/denied all this looking back now.) They travel together to conferences, attend events and she has been helping him with his application for tenure. The rest of her department are men in their 60's and above (not my wife's type) so he is the most obvious choice. He's the same person she told me about the conversation over her phone number:

She even casually mentioned one of her trips with him where he was trying to get her mad by asking for her phone number in front of one of their friends. He said: "Oh that's right, we wouldn't want to upset your husband." She didn't like the challenge, grabbed his phone and punched in her number. She ended the story by telling me: "But he's no one you need to think about." I'm not sure what I was supposed to make of any of it but I followed her advice and chalked up the rest to an overactive imagination.

I feel like my wife has been leading me this way. This man (I guess we can call him The Sergeant) has invited everyone from the department and their families to his home near the beach this summer for a barbecue. I will have to meet him in person, smile and shake his hand. I've been blocking it out of my head along with the other 'truths' but it's too late for that now.

I'll have to find a way to balance these two feelings:

1. Excitement and adoration for my wife pursuing her sexual desires.

2. Anxiety over loosing her each time she's with another man (even if only for a short while). This is almost like a competition that's rigged for me to lose.

-- SIDE NOTE --

Your wife's "Sweetie..." and subsequent sentence, BTW, fits well with her view of you as implied by your screen name. Nice...

Yes, that dynamic had been growing since we first started dating at 16. She kept her name when we married and since she pays the bills our mail comes either addressed almost always to her or sometimes even:

[WIFE'S FULL NAME] Family

or

Dr. [WIFE'S FIRST NAME] and [MY FIRST NAME] [WIFE'S LAST NAME]

That's sums up the motivation behind the name — mr. Her's.

 

[duke9555]

i reject your reality and replace it with my
vastly superior one

 

[Custer Laststand]

Mr. Her's,

I'm certain of the man [my wife is] seeing. At her college there is a former police sergeant who retired young and is now teaching in the same department as my wife. He's tall, in his early forties, italian and in good shape.

Good... it's important to know the identity of your wife's lover. It will enable you to ask your wife, in a normal and natural way, how her relationship with Sarge is going (etc.), then gradually become more specific: "Did you find Sarge satisfying last night...?" After a while she may realize you find it natural, normal and to be expected that she has a lover and stop treating it as something she has to conceal from you.

I feel like my wife has been leading me this way. This man (I guess we can call him The Sergeant) has invited everyone from the department and their families to his home near the beach this summer for a barbecue. I will have to meet him in person, smile and shake his hand.

Very good. I suspect you'll find it secretly-satisfying to experience the humiliation of meeting, shaking the hand and talking with the man you know is fucking your wife. You should try to become accustomed to it, since no doubt there will be more in the future... perhaps many more.

I'll have to find a way to balance these two feelings:

1. Excitement and adoration of my wife for [successfully] pursuing her sexual desires.

2. Anxiety over losing my wife each time she's with another man, even if only for a short while. It's almost like a competition that's rigged for me to lose.

I suggest attempting to weight "1" most heavily while attempting to learn to live with "2." A way to come to terms with "2" may be to point out to yourself that in reality, you are not "losing" these competitions for your wife's affections. Rather, you are winning in the sense that each time your wife fucks another man, she leaves him and returns home to you.

My tendency to view myself as "Mr. Her's" has been growing since we first started dating at 16. She kept her name when we married and since she pays the bills, our mail comes either addressed to her or sometimes to:

[WIFE'S FULL NAME] Family, or:

Dr. [WIFE'S FIRST NAME] and [MY FIRST NAME] [WIFE'S LAST NAME]

I like it. Perhaps you should have formally adopted your wife's last name when you married so you would be: Dr. and Mr. [Her first name] [Her last name]. It may not be too late to do this now. If you and your wife live in the U.S., some states have passed legislation making it just as easy for a man to change his surname to his wife's surname on marriage as it always has been for a woman to change her surname to her husband's surname on marriage. I mean... since your wife is the head of her (and your) household, why not? See:

Is it time for the man to take the woman’s surname in marriage?
http://www.likelike.com/pollcommentary.rhinoceros?poll_id=2232

—Custer

 

[mr.Her's]

A Few Small Steps Toward Open Acknowledgement

Last weekend my wife was away conducting a workshop for three days. I picked her up from the airport late Sunday and asked how it went. There were lots of stories (mostly pertaining to her work) but one was more interesting.

She told me that on the last night the group of thirty people went out for drinks. My wife doesn't drink much but after a few hours of socializing she wanted one of the single guys to take her dancing. She said he was good looking and they had been working hard — why not? Unfortunately when she looked at him and said "So who's going to take me dancing?" an older man in the group who has had a crush on my wife said "I'll take you."

My wife tried to get the other guy and some of the women to go but everyone had a change of heart. She politely told the older man that maybe she had too much to drink and better get to bed.

While nothing ended up happening, it was significant that my wife was very comfortable telling me about her pursuits. It was even more significant that I was able to comfortably hear her story.

That leads me to today. She has been at the college working on a project all day and left to go to another nearby university for other work. I know she ends up coming home later than most normal meetings from these trips so I decided to take the initiative and not stick my head in the sand.

I texted her:
"Are you coming home after the meeting or thinking of hanging out with someone there? Should I wait to have dinner?

A while later she replied:
"No don't wait for me."

And now I'm left for the evening with my thoughts racing.

I know these are a few small things but to me they are solid steps forward.

 

[mr.Her's]

Sister-In-Law Knowingly Flashes Two Fingers Over My Head

My sister-in-law was giggling while I felt her two fingers wiggle above the back of my head. We were driving home last night from a dinner my mother-in-law's family had to celebrate their kid's graduation.

A week ago my wife came home from what I knew was a date with her friend from work (the police sergeant). I wasn't sure what to expect but we had been taking baby steps toward having her cuckolding me be out in the open. But it looks like we may have gone as far as she wants to go for now.

When I asked her how her date went she sat down next to me and said:

"I like teasing you about it once in a while... which — c'mon, I know you like too! But I like keeping home life separate from work and friends. Besides, it's too hard to worry about what you might be doing or thinking. I think I like the old fashioned way of both of us, for the most part, pretending nothing is happening. I just think it's easier. Let's leave it at that. Ok?"

So I didn't ask any more questions and I wont. I don't know how long I can last like this but my hope is that I'll eventually learn to live with it.

I guess once in a while I can expect my wife to tease me about it and have a few inside jokes made at my expense. Just like last night when my sister-in-law 'put the horns' on me.

My mother-in-law, seated between my wife and sister-in-law, tried to quietly say "No, no. Don't do that. That means something bad." My wife followed with "Shhh." While fighting not to start giggling herself. I turned around and saw my wife bite her lip while quickly turning away from me to look out the window.

I said: "Are those your fingers."

My sister-in-law, now laughing out loud said: "Yup!"

I followed: "At least their nicely manicured."

She came back: "Yeah, see, at least you can say they're pretty!"

I guess this is what I can expect every now and then in the future. I was a little shocked at the idea that my wife would tell my sister-in-law about our situation. She's definitely respectful of my wife's business so I'm sure she wont blab about it to anyone but I was pretty uncomfortable.

 

[mimi27406]

Think, but I feel your decision has been made

I'm a coward. It's hard to say but very true. I've been able to handle most of the events and circumstances that have made our marriage into one where my wife is the head of our home. However, I've placed myself in a position where my wife has little confidence in me with regards to sharing any cuckolding experiences.

Sahara
"Read hundreds of cuckold stories on the internet and imagine you are the cuckold in the story - and if you find yourself being drawn into the web, you will notice that you will actually undergo a personality change - into becoming a full-throated cuckold, not a wannabe, and you will act in a way that lets your wife feel that even if she tells you the truth, you will never get upset. She will notice how devoted you are to ensuring she has all the things she needs for a comfortable life. She is more likely to tell you her secrets if she realises you are mentally ready to hear the truth. "

A cuckold is very likely going to be A sissy and submissive. Don't waste your life fighting it, embrace it. Wives seldom have confidence in men, even alpha males, but by relinguishing controk to them you are free to wiggle your ass and she has the problems. Frankly they are better suited for pressure.