how can I find out?

[aob123]

Familiar Theme

Oh so familiar. My wife a retired teacher has had affairs off and on over our 30 year marriage. I will never forget when it started. She would go out with friends after work but when she got home it was straight to bathroom, shower, and then started laundry. Of course there was an excuse the club being so smoky. The signs are so classic but obvious and true.
As the affair continued she became more relaxed in her behavior and even though she would still shower right away she started just throwing clothes in the hanper. I started checking her panties and yes, just as expected they were coated with cum.

Over the years there have been many flings, I could almost always tell when there was a new boyfriend. Subtle changes in her dress, new (usually sexier) lingerie, out more often with friends, or long shopping trips with no purchases. She also became more casual and would just come home, change in to clothes to relax and act like nothing happened. The panties would almost always tell the tell, cum stains or sometimes soaked. One time she came home freshly fucked with a huge hot still sticky load in the panties. The guy must have been a real heavy cummer or she was with more than one guy.

Many times I called her on cheating and even though evidence was overwhelming she would just deny. I let her know it was ok if she wanted to see other guys but she would deny anything was going on. Obviously I was both concerned and excited. Many a time I have fantasized about watching her and a boyfriend. She has made me her cuckold while publicly denying anything going on.
We are now in our upper 50's and her activity has been way down the last few years. Even though she has gained some weight she is still sexy as hell, works out every day, with a firm butt, and big tits. She always says no body could be interested in her but somebody sure is. I came home Monday evening and found the evidence- Panties in the closet, soaked with lube and cum stains still moist. She has a lunchdate for Thursday and I know what to expect- another soaked pair when I get home in the evening. Ah- I can't wait I'm hard just thinking about it.

 

[Saraha]

Oh so familiar. My wife a retired teacher has had affairs off and on over our 30 year marriage. I will never forget when it started. She would go out with friends after work but when she got home it was straight to bathroom, shower, and then started laundry. Of course there was an excuse the club being so smoky. The signs are so classic but obvious and true.
As the affair continued she became more relaxed in her behavior and even though she would still shower right away she started just throwing clothes in the hanper. I started checking her panties and yes, just as expected they were coated with cum.

Over the years there have been many flings, I could almost always tell when there was a new boyfriend. Subtle changes in her dress, new (usually sexier) lingerie, out more often with friends, or long shopping trips with no purchases. She also became more casual and would just come home, change in to clothes to relax and act like nothing happened. The panties would almost always tell the tell, cum stains or sometimes soaked. One time she came home freshly fucked with a huge hot still sticky load in the panties. The guy must have been a real heavy cummer or she was with more than one guy.

Many times I called her on cheating and even though evidence was overwhelming she would just deny. I let her know it was ok if she wanted to see other guys but she would deny anything was going on. Obviously I was both concerned and excited. Many a time I have fantasized about watching her and a boyfriend. She has made me her cuckold while publicly denying anything going on.
We are now in our upper 50's and her activity has been way down the last few years. Even though she has gained some weight she is still sexy as hell, works out every day, with a firm butt, and big tits. She always says no body could be interested in her but somebody sure is. I came home Monday evening and found the evidence- Panties in the closet, soaked with lube and cum stains still moist. She has a lunchdate for Thursday and I know what to expect- another soaked pair when I get home in the evening. Ah- I can't wait I'm hard just thinking about it.

Thousands of men dream of have a cuckoldress wife - and you have a ready made one. Wow, OMG, you are so fucking lucky. But if only you could ask your wife for the creampies that she is meant to bring home for you, you would surely be over the moon.

 

[Custer Laststand]

Aob,

Thanks for your intriguing post, which seems somewhat out of the ordinary.

Oh so familiar. .... Over the years [my wife has had] many flings. I could almost always tell when there was a new boyfriend. Subtle changes in her dress, new (usually sexier) lingerie, she goes out more often with friends, or on long shopping trips with no purchases. .... Her panties almost always told the tale, with cum stains or sometimes they would be soaked. One time she came home freshly fucked with a huge hot still-sticky load in her panties. The guy must have been a heavy cummer, or she was with more than one guy.

That's very cool...

Many times I called my wife on cheating, but even though the evidence was overwhelming she would just deny it.

Instead of "calling" your wife on "cheating," have you considered just talking with her about it in a normal conversational way (while ignoring her denials), as if it were a totally expected thing for her to be doing, and rewarding her — say, by buying her a bouquet of flowers or taking her out to dinner (or both) — whenever you infer she has taken a new lover?

I let her know it was ok if she wanted to see other guys, but she would deny anything was going on. Obviously I was both concerned and excited. Many a time I have fantasized about watching her with a boyfriend. She has made me her cuckold while publicly denying anything is going on.

It sounds like your wife is an accomplished old-school cuckoldress, while you... as her long-term cuckold... have a much more progressive view of it being her privilege and prerogative to act on her strong sexuality by fucking other men.

We are now in our upper 50's, and her activity has been way down during the past few years. Even though she has gained some weight she is still sexy as hell. She works out every day, and has a firm butt and big tits.

Good for your wife. Is she stronger than you are? Before answering this question you might look at:

The Stronger Sex Physically (is female…)
Comments: The Stronger Sex Physically

For all women and girls: did you ever physically overpower a grown man?
Comments: For all women AND girls: Did you ever physically overpower a grown man? Not a boy. Not an adolescent. A GROWN MAN!!!

Women Who Beat Up Men:
Comments: women who beat up men

She always says nobody could be interested in her, but somebody sure is. I came home Monday evening and found the evidence: panties in the closet, soaked with lube, and cum stains still moist.

Obviously your wife is continuing to do well despite her age. Presumably she needs a fair amount of lube now due to pussy dryness caused by being past menopause.

She has a lunch date for Thursday, and I know what to expect: another soaked pair of panties when I get home in the evening. Ah... I can't wait. I'm hard just thinking about it.

Very good... and you should be hard, of course, just thinking your wife's lunch sex. You might consider implementing a reward scheme whenever she comes home after fucking a lover (as mentioned above), with a larger reward whenever you sense she's taken a new lover. If it's a change in your behavior and she asks you about it, you could say you feel her sexual accomplishments deserve special recognition now that she's "no longer as young as she used to be."

Given that your wife never admits cuckolding you by fucking other men (always, with vigor, and for MANY years, it sounds like), is she the dominant partner in your marriage — or does she pretend to be a "normal wife" and that you are "a normal 'man of the house' "?

—Custer

 

[aob123]

Thank you guys, yes she is very exciting. Since menopause she usually uses a fair amount of lube. She by all accounts is a normal wife and represents herself that way all the times other than seeking sex outside of marriage.

 

[cheggers]

What will you do if you find her sperm-stained panties in the laundry basket? I imagine you do most of the washing as part of you doing most of the housework.

Actually, Saraha, the laundry is about the only job she does. She washes. I dry, fold, put away.

 

[alexbreezy]

this one is easy. she is going behind your back. make the decision you want to make about it. id bet a paycheck on it

 

[Tanboat05]

After all these years, you can probably figure out how to watch from a distance. That would be hot.

 

[cheggers]

After all these years, you can probably figure out how to watch from a distance. That would be hot.

And tempting.

One more bit of information. One time when she was out I found her wedding ring in a container the bathroom cabinet. After she got home I noticed it back on her finger. I asked her about it. She said she had misplaced it.

 

[Tanboat05]

It sounds like she is a player and comfortable with it. That means you can figure out how to see more of what is happening. Do you guys share a PC?

 

[will2112001]

actually, saraha, the laundry is about the only job she does. She washes. I dry, fold, put away.

what a surprise!!!!!

 

[cheggers]

It sounds like she is a player and comfortable with it. That means you can figure out how to see more of what is happening. Do you guys share a PC?

This one, actually. What are you suggesting I do?

 

[Tanboat05]

Oh, try one of those keyboard loggers. Find out her online habits. That might lead to a secret hook up that you can watch from a distance. Perhaps see where they hook up. It is a start.

You might find out how she likes to play and then arrange someone to meet her.

 

[cheggers]

I happened to take a look at the calendar on her cell phone. One word entry for tomorrow afternoon, "Drew." Nothing else.

 

[mimi27406]

Why do you want to know?

More to the point Cheggers is what are you going to do about it if you find out that she is doing the things you suspect. I think you already know and just want to beat yourself up over it. Sneeking around and trying to find evidence is just going to make your seem pitiful and increase her desire to find others to bed her. Do you really truly care? I sure don't know what to tell you to do but I do know about a lot not to do. You might try something like this, honey I am not trying to tell you where to go, what to do, or with whom to do it with but I would appreciate knowing where you are in case of emergency. Frankly with todays cell phones you can track her for a few dollars more.

I was told that when a man strarts to stray he will dress better, and I bet it is true with the female. You know she really does not care what you think or know. Stay or Go. Has she bought new clothes or gotten gifts?

What we have here is a lack of communication! Often women get tired of men alway talking about money or the lack there of and that is not likely to get her in the mood for sex.

 

[cheggers]

You might try something like this, honey I am not trying to tell you where to go, what to do, or with whom to do it with but I would appreciate knowing where you are in case of emergency.

This sounds like a great idea, mimi. Because I really don't know where she is most of the time.

I was told that when a man strarts to stray he will dress better, and I bet it is true with the female. You know she really does not care what you think or know. Stay or Go. Has she bought new clothes or gotten gifts?

New clothes? New shoes? Frequently. And I rarely get to see her in them. She gets dressed up to go out, then as soon as she gets home she changes into lay-around-the-house clothes. There was a gold necklace she got as a gift about a year ago, but I don't know who gave it to her. "A friend," is all I know.

She says you can always tell when a woman is "advertising." The pic "on the prowl" isn't a whole lot different from what she wears to work.

 

[mimi27406]

You know

cheggers, I think you know and if you were going to leave you would have allready. It excites you to think she is fooling around doesn't it?

 

[cheggers]

cheggers, I think you know and if you were going to leave you would have allready. It excites you to think she is fooling around doesn't it?

Maybe just a little.

 

[2wheel]

I told my wife some time ago she could have sex with whomever she wanted, with 2 conditions:1-She tells them I'm OK with it, 2-She tells me the details if & when I ask.

I was looking for something in the trunk of her car, buried in the far corner, in a plastic bag under some stuff, I found an opened container of sex lubricant.

So I her with the question, immediate denial. The more insistent I become the more firm the denial.

I am sure she fucked someone else, and that's OK, the denial, albeit the lie isn't. Now there's a trust issue, not about fidelity but truth. I don't care if she sucks and fucks the entire eastern seaboard, just be straight with me.

So is honesty the best policy?, absolutely. I suggest you broach the subject with her, but don't blind side her as I think I did causing a knee-jerk reaction of denial. Work into it with approvals if she did, set the stage for your acceptance before you press the question button. In time ease into the question in a relaxed atmosphere. Let it be OK for her to do it and OK to tell you.

Learn from my mistake.

 

[cheggers]

Learn from my mistake.

Too late, 2wheel. My experience is a lot like yours:

Before we were married we were out with a female friend and her b.f. A nice, vanilla evening. On the way home, my wife (then g.f.) brought up the idea, appropos of nothing, that she would be willing to have my friend's b.f. take photos of the two of us, including erotic pics.

I was surprised. Although my g.f. was a little sex pot, she was discrete. (or, at least learned to be discrete).

Then she said she would be comfortable with it, and her ex "liked to share his bed with other couples."

BANG. I snapped. First, I was 100% turned on and horny. Second, I was enraged by feelings of betrayal. Why, after three years of dating had she never once told me about this? I accused her of building walls between us, of harboring secrets. She stonewalled. Never said another word about it.

I tried to bring it up years later and got stonewalled again. Her only response, "I guess now you'll never know."

Over the past couple years, I have said to her:
I have fantasies that she has other lovers. Her response: That's a common fantasy. Stonewall.

"You can have anyone you want as long as you don't leave me." Stonewall.

"You should have two husbands: me to be the househusband and your personal assistant, and another to give you the fun exciting life you deserve." Stonewall.

She frequently tells me she loves me, says she couldn't live without me--but only when I've done a lot of housework, or a good job cleaning, or done well as her "personal assistant" or given her a good footrub.

She has never said those things in regards to sex. In regards to sex, she said I'm a loser, "You're the one who is missing out." "Don't ever expect me to ask you for sex." "I'd be better off with a different guy and you'd be better off with a different woman, but I've never met one who would want to." (referring to my penis size)

So where's that leave me? She refuses to talk about her group sex experiences, refuses to discuss my willingness to be the beta to an alpha, etc. I can't be any more explicit in how I feel, or in my willingness to discuss.

 

[will2112001]

Ok, Maybe You just have to grow a pair for a night and sit down and ave a heart to heart with Her. Tell Her what You think You know. Tell her what You want from Your relationship. Ask Her what She wants. Also be prepared to end the relationship. Or go on with the statue quo. And Your mouth shut.