Well, had some free time and thought I'd answer Peak's and other comments.
My answer is clearly a no to her denying herself or I if Paul were out of the picture. I don't know how quickly she'd "come around" but without another guy at Paul's status but yes, I'm quite sure that sooner than later it would return to the 2 of us. But I think your second question is what you were really inferring in the first too - whether she'd deny herself the extremeness of her own orgasm to continue or even fulfill what is likely to be my continued beta desires?
A part of me believes her, it scares me a little to think of this as perhaps a fait-accompli - but then I know that even if she were to truly want and even insist on my continued use of condoms, I know well that without another guy in the picture, perhaps not all the time, but surely occasionally she would let/want me to go bare with her. For me, with that as an ever-looming possibility, I do think I would be content continuing to use condoms with her. It really does seem strange to think that much less write it - but it is true - I can't explain it but it is perhaps the single most thing that arouses me the most - that Paul is the only one to enjoy that with her.
We have talked more about what she perceives as me "fighting it" - and she says, rightfully so, that I do still find it awkward and uneasy to talk with her more openly about my feelings - and she's said that she would like it if I could find it in myself to be there with them when they're having sex and to interact with them "it'd be nice if you were able to talk to us" and she giggled and said "it's not like we don't know you're there". But about the next few months, in some ways I think it's quite the opposite - I actually feel very calm and aroused by everything that may happen.
We have talked a bit more openly about next week with my departure now on Sunday evening - fortunately going west you gain time so I can leave later. She isn't seeing him until after I leave and she says she's not sure if she's going to his place on Sunday night or Monday after work. She was and still is very concerned that I'm okay with her spending "this much time with Paul" and I simply asked her if there was anything for me to be concerned or worried about? She immediately giggled and said "oh my god, of course not..." but we did talk and she did say that she anticipated "having sex a lot" and she shared that she wanted the experience again of "having to put a pad in my undies when I go off to work" and she said she has fond memories of that from back with Don when they would go out at lunch and have sex. She asked me if that turned me on and I told her that of course it turned me on, but I also told her that it also really turned me on that she was going to have sex with him every morning before work and she giggled and said "it's been a long time for that too". I told her that I expected her to enjoy herself all week and that it was what I wanted too. She said that she would find time to talk to me and that we'll text when we can't talk and then she giggled and said "should I tease you and tell you how many times like that one time I went away?". I groaned having forgotten all about that and she giggled and without me even answering she said "okay".
I don't know if that made any sense but I am also comforted by our sort of "schedule" that we will find time to have sex together - truly make love and not just her letting me get off in her - sometime just after New Years. She knows I am extremely aroused by not having sex with her this New Years Eve and that we'll find a way for her to be with Paul some time that day/night if in fact he doesn't opt to simply come over. It felt good to tell her that again and she said she understood that it would turn me on and she giggled and said "it'll be fine with me baby". The same is true for Christmas - but them getting together is unlikely - but that she will likely abstain with me that night too is also just crazily arousing to me.
For Dutch - we already agreed that we'd talk at least daily and she asked/told me "as long as you don't mind it if Paul's around" so I know that at times she may not easily be able to talk but that we'll text, etc., as she said "why wouldn't we talk like normally if one of us goes away without the other".
But yes, it is incredibly arousing to think of her living with him for a week. As I said, we've talked openly at times and she knows that for whatever reason - having sex with him aside - that her waking up with him in the morning and all that goes with it is still the most intense thing for me to deal with. I know how she is in the morning and knowing he'll see that side - well - all of her at those times - is just crazy arousing. This morning she stood there and hiked up her night-shirt and pulled up her panties and then pulled the night-shirt off and stood in front of the mirror while she held different bra's up to her breasts till she picked one - knowing he'll be lying there in bed like I was - seeing her like that - it just so turns me on. She still giggles too that she's comfy peeing (and even more as she alluded to) in front of him and not me.
Tgel - yeah - arousing thoughts but perhaps a bit much. The dropcam thing is interesting for when they're here but she'll be at his place this time so that's unlikely. I think Peak has it summed up - your suggestions would be good for couple into different things than we are.
Also for Peak and others - this time - the conversations that I'm sharing weren't in the heat of the moment. Granted there has been a bit of a sharper barb to her teasing - evidenced last night when she was quite explicit in telling me she wanted to see me "cum all over yourself". At another point last night she was sidled up next to me almost whispering in my ear as she watched me stroking my cock and she started to tell me "...his cum is really thick sometimes baby..." and how "... it takes a long time for me to feel it start to drip out...". She was very much seizing on things I'd told her when we'd been talking and she giggled when I suddenly came all over myself as she told me how "...his cum is in my vagina all the time..." ( she knows at the right moment hearing her talk like that - so correctly - will just set me off - and last night was no different ). I guess he really does cum a lot more than I do at times because while it felt wonderful, lets just say that there wasn't nearly as much cum as at other times.
Anyway - time for a conference call with work.
