I knew I left this hanging before but I had run out of time. Anyway - what I wanted to add, need to add actually - is that afterwards she came down really close to me and she hugged me and said "it's just play - that's the point". I told her what I'd said here - that I wasn't used to sharing so much of "that kind of stuff". She looked at me and said that it's okay and that she said she has her own share of "nasty thoughts" and she said that we should have fun sharing them - she again looked at me but this time she said "It's okay that I'm a slut in your fantasies" - she giggled and said "I'm one in mine too" and she hugged me.
The moment had sort of passed by then and it seemed like it was suddenly late - after 10pm by then and we realized our daughter would be home soon. She leaned down and gave me a kiss that, combined with her nasty girl comments, made me feel a lot more at ease.
Harry - I think maybe your suggestions helped a little. I think she did seem more engaged and into the same thoughts and such - but hard to tell. I don't think she ever questions that I want her though.
Raks - I'm of 2 schools of thought regarding vacation. On the one hand, I thought I'd said here but definitely in PM's and Emails, that I do sort of think she'd like me to continue to use condoms with her. It's something she seems very intent on and, apparently, very aroused by. However, I do think that Peak is more in line with what will actually happen. Same as when we were in Jamaica - and as I've said all along here - if I take her away somewhere where she can totally disconnect (even with our kids around), that we seem to pick right back up.
I admit that I am very VERY surprised at my response to using condoms with her. It triggers such intense thoughts and feelings that arouse me incredibly. I suppose this is one area where her desires have spilled over into my own psyche.
She thinks I am "having my fun" right now as I told her earlier that "last night just left me wanting more". She giggled and said "you're done with me till Friday or Saturday....." - which answered my question that I hadn't asked about when she'd see him again.
I was asked in a PM about Sue's dad. I do not go over there as much as I should. But it pains me a lot. My own father passed away many years ago and went through a dramatic downward spiral at the end that was difficult to deal with. Unfortunately, seeing her dad now in a nursing-facility is just too hard for me. As I said, I don't post about other stuff in our lives for good reason. I did go last week and to me it's obvious he's in a downward spiral. He did seem more cognizant and 'with it" mentally, but he's become incredibly frail and weak which, in a way, is worse - to be aware of what is happening, as my own father was.... Enough of that for now.
Harry - I just re-read your last post and I have to say that I honestly don't think Sue doubts that I want her, or that I still want her. What I think, and am now coming to confirm, is that she has been hesitant to ask for things that she's wanted - like the whole condom thing - because she's been concerned about how I'd respond to it. But she is now coming to believe that I am being honest with her when I tell her that I'm okay with it. I think because we've never really played with it in terms of being explicit with each other is that she's not comfortable with it. Maybe I'm wrong but I think that she's questioned it because - all along so far, I'm thinking she's been more recapping/retelling what she's done with her lovers than involving me in it. I honestly can't recall when we teased and turned each other on while we were fucking by talking about her and how she feels and what I'm thinking as I'm fucking her - we've just never shared that sort of thing. She's always turned me on by telling me that he did this or he did that - and yeah sure, it turns me on like crazy. But I honestly don't think I really ever took the time or approach that she's encouraging both of us to take.
For me - I said it here already. I guess it's that I've always kind of not liked sharing my thoughts about Sue and how, in my fantasies I make think of such nasty scenes - like the ski weekend or on vacation, etc. I suppose that tomorrow (tonight now) or Saturday I'll get to hear about her own nasty thoughts.
And now that it's almost 1am - I'll say good night here to all - I'm sure that I probably rambled through the last few paragraphs of thought. It's a weird feeling to feel content about things.