Indy Hubby said:Frequently people believe it's somehow better for them to begin the relationship without the husband present. It really depend on whether you and your wife want it to be something you share or something that doesn't include you.
I think this is what we had naturally assumed would take place as it is easier to see how Kelly and he will hook up without me present. I do not think it is a matter of not including me more of the how would we include me in the first few meetings.
If she begins without you there, that's the norm and you being there will be more the exception. The guy will also see you as the outsider.
Wow I really had not thought of this but I think you are right. I had not looked at this from his perspective before. I have always felt I would say to him do not confuse my willingness to share my wife as me being weak. Not that I have an interest in a dick measuring contest (as I am sure to lose) but more to let him know for me it is about Kelly's enjoyment and not really his at least to start.
For my wife and me, we prefer for it to develop with me there sharing her. He can be dominant or she can, or you can: however it falls into place. For us, if he can't deal with me there, he's probably not sure of himself enough to be of interest to her.
very good point!
... If you're not getting "fed" too, it'll be costly to include potentially your marriage.
yes I agree with this as well. I have to be involved and will always work to have that as well.