Stb, It would seem that Sue would like more but she is skirting around as she is not sure how far your comfort zone extends. For the first time I dedect some reticence in your communication with each other, perhaps because neither one knows exactly how far they want to go or how to express it. Actually that is why it is working for you; because it has been slowly developing.
A new page in our book....
- Thread starterSoonToBe
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R
rural
Guest
SoonToBe said:
I think I maybe in the same situation as your, to some extent.
Ann may want to take things further with her boss but then she does not know how to express it. The same with me, I don't know how to break the ice.
I read somewhere that a woman thinks a lot more, especially is she is married, if she is going to get another man, even if her husbands permits. The thought that the husband could use her fling to file for a divorce is always a possibility, I mean even outgoing people can also lose their temper.
I feel that the best way is to let this thing slowly develop and relish the journey.
Rural - I do think we're in the same place in many ways. And I have to agree with you that it is a time to let things develop at their own pace and enjoy the journey.
I'm quite tittilated tonight as Sue told me earlier that she's going to see Don tomorrow after work - she's actually going to leave work a bit early and drive down to where Don is staying in a hotel about an hour and a half south of us - almost a 2 hour drive for her.
Needless to say - no nookie tonight but I may find some time to have a bit of fun later.....
I'm quite tittilated tonight as Sue told me earlier that she's going to see Don tomorrow after work - she's actually going to leave work a bit early and drive down to where Don is staying in a hotel about an hour and a half south of us - almost a 2 hour drive for her.
Needless to say - no nookie tonight but I may find some time to have a bit of fun later.....
R
rural
Guest
SoonToBe said:
Unlike some erotic stories or movies where its all sex from beginning to the end, it is not the same with real life.
In some ways, your situation have developed better than mine. Likewise, I hope mine will follow the same direction. Since your wife have told you that she will see Don after work, now that is progress. And she even talks about Don during your love making session which is another plus.
Furthermore, she needs to know if Don will treat her right, respect her wishes and generally, look after her.
It may be lust and horniness at the moment, but if she is now willing to take a 4hr journey there and back to meet him at a hotel, then i can assure you that these feelings she has will develop into something more profound the longer she continues to see him. I hope you will be able to handle that when it happens.
Duke - you may be right that she's got more of an emotional attachment to Don. Whether it's love like it was with Brad or whether it's lust/infatuation - it's okay for now. I know it's playing with fire letting her grow this close to him but as I said, the time we have together really leaves me no doubt about our own relationship.
I know maybe I should be worried in a way but there is something that is just incredibly arousing to me seeing her pack her little bag this morning to bring with her and knowing she's going off to see her lover.
Even when she's not seeing him - there are times when I'll just look at her and a rush of horniness will overtake me when I think of them fucking. I had thought that maybe that feeling would subside over time but to this day seeing her, even just working around the house or whatever, and knowing she's fucking another guy and carrying his cum in her afterwards is still such a turn-on.
I know maybe I should be worried in a way but there is something that is just incredibly arousing to me seeing her pack her little bag this morning to bring with her and knowing she's going off to see her lover.
Even when she's not seeing him - there are times when I'll just look at her and a rush of horniness will overtake me when I think of them fucking. I had thought that maybe that feeling would subside over time but to this day seeing her, even just working around the house or whatever, and knowing she's fucking another guy and carrying his cum in her afterwards is still such a turn-on.
Sue & Don
STB:
Of course We each have our own way of justifying the way we live and the way we think all culminating in what 'turns us on' as an individual. You know what turns you on and you 'seem' to know what 'turns Sue on'. Of course I am a 'third party observer' and can only analyze what I read in your thread. When I try to put myself in your position or step into your shoe's so to speak, I believe I would be much more comfortable being more closely involved as in being with Sue more often when she is with Don (or any other lover) I not only know I would be more comfortable, but I believe the wife (Sue in this scenario) would feel more comfort and support from you her husband and would be less likely to "run off" (as we now see a 4 hour drive + time with him with little chance for you to intervine with her decision) Or, as you acknowledge a fear of, Her "running off" with a lover for a much longer time (also without your objection).
STB, at this time it would have only taken a "I would rather you did not go" to stop her. The more times this happens, the less likely you will be asked. I just think by then it won't be much of a "turn on" anymore.
Sorry, But I just worry that: 'thinking you have good communication and therefore a good marriage' is not as good as good communication and togetherness in a marriage. The less intimate time she spends with you, and the more with a lover (with or without your consent) will, whether you see it now or not, be the end of the good communication and the good marriage.
Just my opinion!!! As I said, I am not there to observe. (only as a third party reader) But I seriously worry for you and I am not alone!!
Cheers, Harry
STB:
Of course We each have our own way of justifying the way we live and the way we think all culminating in what 'turns us on' as an individual. You know what turns you on and you 'seem' to know what 'turns Sue on'. Of course I am a 'third party observer' and can only analyze what I read in your thread. When I try to put myself in your position or step into your shoe's so to speak, I believe I would be much more comfortable being more closely involved as in being with Sue more often when she is with Don (or any other lover) I not only know I would be more comfortable, but I believe the wife (Sue in this scenario) would feel more comfort and support from you her husband and would be less likely to "run off" (as we now see a 4 hour drive + time with him with little chance for you to intervine with her decision) Or, as you acknowledge a fear of, Her "running off" with a lover for a much longer time (also without your objection).
STB, at this time it would have only taken a "I would rather you did not go" to stop her. The more times this happens, the less likely you will be asked. I just think by then it won't be much of a "turn on" anymore.
Sorry, But I just worry that: 'thinking you have good communication and therefore a good marriage' is not as good as good communication and togetherness in a marriage. The less intimate time she spends with you, and the more with a lover (with or without your consent) will, whether you see it now or not, be the end of the good communication and the good marriage.
Just my opinion!!! As I said, I am not there to observe. (only as a third party reader) But I seriously worry for you and I am not alone!!
Cheers, Harry
STB, Apart from winding Duke up, I haven't been too active lately. I just wanted to say that I don'r share any the 'doom' views really. Life is never black or white though, it's how we handle the greyer moments I suppose.
I think the thing is that all of us in relationships should not kid ourselves that one special person can provide everything that the other needs. Indeed in trying sometimes we actually stifle the life out of a relationship. The balance then is how to handle the conflict caused by satisfying those desires outside of the relationship. This could be something as simple as going fishing to get some time alone (which may leave the other feeling lonely or over burdened) to what you two are doing. Expressing some of the passion that exists in the new and the strange or forbidden.
The question perhaps is maybe, Is there a pattern developing that is creating an inexorable decline in the quality time you have together and an increase with Don ? Can you and Sue control that change ? I believe you can. The water coming into the boat at the moment is not enough to sink it and is caused by the departure of Brad and the illness in Don's family. You are wise is letting Sue handle the outcomes as they affect her, but don't be blind to making sure that the new stability on the other side of all this works for you both still. Don, for sure will always want more, but there must be limits to what he can have. The question, as always is, What do you and Sue want ?
I think the thing is that all of us in relationships should not kid ourselves that one special person can provide everything that the other needs. Indeed in trying sometimes we actually stifle the life out of a relationship. The balance then is how to handle the conflict caused by satisfying those desires outside of the relationship. This could be something as simple as going fishing to get some time alone (which may leave the other feeling lonely or over burdened) to what you two are doing. Expressing some of the passion that exists in the new and the strange or forbidden.
The question perhaps is maybe, Is there a pattern developing that is creating an inexorable decline in the quality time you have together and an increase with Don ? Can you and Sue control that change ? I believe you can. The water coming into the boat at the moment is not enough to sink it and is caused by the departure of Brad and the illness in Don's family. You are wise is letting Sue handle the outcomes as they affect her, but don't be blind to making sure that the new stability on the other side of all this works for you both still. Don, for sure will always want more, but there must be limits to what he can have. The question, as always is, What do you and Sue want ?
Peak - thanks for the kind words. I guess you are also correct as well as Harry and even Duke as all are possible. I would say that even I feel a bit for Don's situation and maybe that's partly behind my acceptance or even agreement that she wanted to see him tonight.
I do think that both Harry and Duke only focus on the "dark side" when I know the love and passion that we feel when it's just Sue and I. She may tease and such but when we are in the midst of intense passion - looking at each other, feeling each other and professing our love for each other - well, if you were there you'd understand. But it's not just then - it's all the rest of the time when it's not centered around sex. It's the look in her eye when we're out to dinner without the kids. It's the gentle squeeze holding my hand as we take a hike through the nature-preserve trails nearby. It's lying on our lounges in the backyard with the music on enjoying relaxing in the sun. And yes, it's the moments together going to visit colleges with our son or working on a school project together with our daughter.
But I"m getting carried away - suffice to say that I think we meet Harry's definition of a good-marriage. Well, maybe with a kink or two.
More later.
I do think that both Harry and Duke only focus on the "dark side" when I know the love and passion that we feel when it's just Sue and I. She may tease and such but when we are in the midst of intense passion - looking at each other, feeling each other and professing our love for each other - well, if you were there you'd understand. But it's not just then - it's all the rest of the time when it's not centered around sex. It's the look in her eye when we're out to dinner without the kids. It's the gentle squeeze holding my hand as we take a hike through the nature-preserve trails nearby. It's lying on our lounges in the backyard with the music on enjoying relaxing in the sun. And yes, it's the moments together going to visit colleges with our son or working on a school project together with our daughter.
But I"m getting carried away - suffice to say that I think we meet Harry's definition of a good-marriage. Well, maybe with a kink or two.
More later.
She called about 11 and said she was on her way and that I should "wait up for her". I laughed and said "as if you have a choice". So, she should be home in maybe 30-45 minutes - it's raining again so I hope she's taking it slow.
Rural - no I didn't tag along with her. I didn't really think about it. Whatever - if she's doing it to console Don or just because she wants to be with him - I figure it's something between them.
I guess from the posts here and some of the PM's I've gotten, everyone is thinking that Sue is either getting very emotionally involved with Don or that she's fallen in love with him. I know either or both is a possibility and, at least right now, it doesn't worry me if it's true. I'd even say that if it is something that gives Sue the desire and courage to want more with him - then, again, at this point in time, I want to let it happen. As I've said to others, I know it sounds crazy but I do want to see her want him. I want to see her let herself go with him as she did with Brad.
It's sort of the same feeling when you taught your kids to ride a bike. You stand back beaming about them and feeling proud for them - and feeling good vicariously because they have that smile on their face that they've done something that they feel good about. I get the same feeling when Sue lets herself go with Don and I can share in it with her - even if it's an hour or two later - feeling her warm body next to mine.
Damn, I'm about ready to burst now waiting for her!
Rural - no I didn't tag along with her. I didn't really think about it. Whatever - if she's doing it to console Don or just because she wants to be with him - I figure it's something between them.
I guess from the posts here and some of the PM's I've gotten, everyone is thinking that Sue is either getting very emotionally involved with Don or that she's fallen in love with him. I know either or both is a possibility and, at least right now, it doesn't worry me if it's true. I'd even say that if it is something that gives Sue the desire and courage to want more with him - then, again, at this point in time, I want to let it happen. As I've said to others, I know it sounds crazy but I do want to see her want him. I want to see her let herself go with him as she did with Brad.
It's sort of the same feeling when you taught your kids to ride a bike. You stand back beaming about them and feeling proud for them - and feeling good vicariously because they have that smile on their face that they've done something that they feel good about. I get the same feeling when Sue lets herself go with Don and I can share in it with her - even if it's an hour or two later - feeling her warm body next to mine.
Damn, I'm about ready to burst now waiting for her!
