I'm not sure where to start this morning. I didn't think I'd have some time to post here but the kids are either still sleeping or on their computers and Sue went to take a walk on the beach so here I am.
Like I said, I'm not sure where to start as things are just all over the place and we've already been talking about a lot of stuff. I'm sure I'll get to posting about the stuff we talked about yesterday as we took a long walk down the beach. Sue admitted that maybe this is her version of a mid-life crisis - she said that she'd never admitted that she had all of these crazy thoughts and desires - until now and she held my hand tightly and said that she was glad I was okay with her. I told her that I'd always be okay and would always love her and she said that she hoped I would say that as she just feels that - before it's too late, that she wants to try and do things that she'd previously put out of her mind.
All sorts of stuff - she's said she wants to learn to scuba-dive and that she wants to learn to cross-country ski. She wants to take a cooking class and she wants to try yoga. That stuff is all minor but there's a sound to her voice when she spoke about it that has a different tone - one of wanting it instead of just talking about it.
Sex too. She giggled and said that she expects that Robert is going to move on - as others here have said - before winter gets here. But it's the way she said it - truly like a teenager having a summer-fling. I asked her if leaving the windows open in the house so she could be seen was another thing she wanted to do - she hesitated for a moment before telling me yes. I told her that I thought it was very hot that she did that and she giggled and said in this questioning voice "so you'd be okay with me doing it for the rest of the week?". After I nodded yes and told her she'd be making them horny she giggled and said that she thought it'd be really sexy if they were masturbating because of her. I stopped walking and just looked at her in amazement at how open she'd become. She said that she's become much more comfortable with herself and with her sexuality.
Anyway - there's more to that conversation but what I wanted to post here was our conversation before/during/after sex last night. She too noted that I would be down to one condom after last night. As we began our foreplay she lay back and put a finger into her pussy and tasted it like she'd done the night before and she giggled and said that tomorrow night (Monday) that I could finally have her without a condom again. I looked up from between her legs and again just stared at her - this vacation was really relaxing her and lowering her inhibitions from how she was talking now so sexily and calmly. She saw me looking at her and she commented again that I could "go inside her pussy" and I didn't miss the opportunity. I didn't taste anything but her but it was still delicious and without much effort at all she came easily and she even put her hand on the back of my head as she pulled her legs back to let me lick her more as she rode out her orgasm.
I knew when she'd come down that it was our turn now. I pulled the next to last condom apart and out of the foil wrapper and she giggled and said how hard I looked. I moaned that I wanted her more and more. As I pulled the condom into place she spread her legs and I moved to kneel between them. With one hand she spread her pussy apart for me and with the other she guided my cock into her. As I pushed into her she looked up at me and said "thank you". I knew what she was saying that for and I just said "you're welcome". She seemed to really get into it as I pushed all the way in and I ground myself into her. She moaned back how turned on she was and then she added "and how you're still not cumming in me".
Maybe I shouldn't have played it up or gone along but at that moment it felt great. I moaned back that I loved how her pussy was just for her lover to cum in. Me saying that seemed to start things up - she moaned back how horny she was when she thinks about it. I could feel it - she wanted to be able to play and have fun with this - and this was definitely one of those moments. I told her that it turned me on that she'd had so much sex with Robert and how wet she always seemed to be from him. She told me how she loved feeling him cum in her. Back and forth it went - she'd say something and then I would. At one point I told her that it turned me on that her pussy and womb were undoubtedly coated with his cum and that seemed to again set her off towards orgasm. She moaned how she'd cum with him many times. But it was when she told me how comfortable his cock was in her now and how she knew her pussy had changed shape to accommodate him - that was when I let go again and grunted away as I came deep in her. She pulled her legs in around me to make me grind up against her as I could feel not just her pussy but her whole body shake.
What I wanted to get to posting about however, wasn't the good sex we'd just had or how great it felt to cum with her so effortlessly and so satisfyingly. No - it was afterwards as I lay against her and we caught our breath. I pushed up away from her but she held me with her legs. She got up on her elbows a bit and then slowly let me pull out. She said she wanted to watch and damn if she didn't start to breathe in harder as I pulled out of her. She leaned up and breathed in deeply as I pulled fully out of her and she again grabbed my cock and slowly slid off the condom. "you seem to cum so much sometimes". I told her that she'd really gotten me turned on and she smiled and said the same and that it turned her on incredibly to see the condom full of my cum. She looked up and said to me that she hoped it didn't bother me but that as we were about to cum together, she hesitated for a moment and then said that she thought about me not cumming in her at that moment and it really turned her on. I lay down next to her and held her for a second and told her that she was beautiful when she came beneath me "for whatever reason".
Thing was, as we lay there she looked up at me and said "you know, you don't 'have to' if you don't want to?". It honestly took me a moment to realize what she'd said because my first response was "huh? what do you mean?" and then as she started to say "you know..." it registered with me. My eyes must have been like saucers as I came out of my post-fuck daze. I looked over at her and said "is that what you'd want?". She held my hand and said "I don't know .... it sure turns me on to think about sometimes". I started to say something - not sure what but she interrupted and said "but that's not fair to you". Again, in hindsight I probably shouldn't have said what I did - but maybe it's the truth? I told her that "they're not that bad" referring to the condoms - and then I think I realized what I'd said because I added "but I was really looking forward to feeling you again". She held me tightly and said "you're right, I'm being selfish" which put me in a weird place so I calmed her and said "no, you're not ... I guess you're just being honest like you wanted". She held me tightly and said that she was sure it was just a phase she was going through but she said that she loved how sexy she felt "knowing" that both of us were turned on by having just Robert cumming in her. I moaned back something like "we'll see" and she said something like "we can always decide when the time comes baby" and she pulled me in for a deep kiss.
I probably should have pushed to talk more about it last night but I didn't - we mellowed out and she giggled that she "didn't have a mess to clean up" and that we could just snuggle into bed after she did one thing". I didn't know what to expect until she went under the blanket and sucked my cock clean and then came back up and said "now you're all ready for bed" and as I said, we spooned up and watched something on TV till we dozed off.
So - it's now Monday morning and there's this huge pink elephant in the room between us. I'm sure the alcohol helped the conversation but she was pretty clear that she'd be turned on if I didn't cum in her. I have one more condom left and I'm contemplating seeing her reaction tonight when I put it on even though she'd said I could have her bare. It's weird to say it - but even typing this right now, my cock is hard thinking about it. There IS something really erotic getting into bed with her to have sex and to think about not cumming in her pussy. Seeing her lying beneath me - spreading her legs for me - and yet at the same time, knowing I'm not going to cum in her!!! And to know she has the same thoughts?! That's the weird/crazy part - that she is turned on by these same thoughts?
If it wasn't for my "need" to feel her again, maybe this wouldn't be that difficult. I have some memories of the few times I'd used condoms before being with Sue - and the sex was still good and I still recall that feeling of conquest afterwards - maybe it's just that I cum and that we cum that is what's the more important part for us? And yet, at the same time - oh my god - knowing HE gets to cum in her! That is the kicker to me that gives me the strangest most intense sexual feelings that leave me oddly satisfied.
I think I am going to do it tonight - use the last condom with her and see her reaction and response.