Having children and the cuckold lifestyle....

[she_likes_2_be_touched]

Need advice from anyone in the lifestyle that are raising children. I am considering getting back into the lifestyle of cucking my bf of almost 10 years. We have dabbled off and on over the years when my children were smaller.

"S" has expressed an interest in my giving him pies and such again to spice things up in the bedroom. I'm definately considering because I would like to have a bigger cock in me from time to time and I love going on dates with other guys.

Here is my dilemma.... I look at my 11yo daughter and I feel like a terrible mother. If she ever found out I would die!!! I also have a 16 yo son who doesn't currently live with me but may soon.

My questions for those of you who have kids is how do you deal with the feelings of guilt? How do you make sure your kids do not find out about your lifestyle? I guess now my daughter is not a toddler anymore I do not want her to A.) find out and B.) damage her sexual psyche.

Any advice from men or women would be appreciated.
Thanks...Cat

 

[AngleBaby]

A. will happen, but B. wont.

Children are not warped by learning a little fact about their parents. It is when you flaunt it in front of your children they start taking some damage. Knowledge of and ******** to are two very different things. Just tell her it is none of her business and shouldn't ask; she should respect your and your husband's privacy. Despite what she finds out by accident, it is true, she should respect others' privacy.

 

[Custer Laststand]

Hi Ms. Cat,

.... I am considering getting back into the lifestyle of cucking my bf of almost 10 years. We dabbled off and on over the years when my children were smaller. "S" [my bf] has expressed an interest in my giving him pies and such again to spice things up in the bedroom. I'm definately considering it because I would like to have a bigger cock in me from time to time, and I love going on dates with other guys.

Good for you, Ms. Cat. That's entirely appropriate... you have the right idea.

Here is my dilemma.... I look at my 11yo daughter and I feel like a terrible mother. If she ever found out, I would die!!! I also have a 16 yo son who doesn't currently live with me but may soon.

Feelings of guilt for not complying with a (usually religious-based) social convention seem to be characteristic of women much more than men, even if no one is hurt... i.e., it's "victimless non-compliance."

My question for those of you who have kids is, how do you deal with the feelings of guilt?

It's interesting you ask, "how do you deal with your feelings of guilt" not "how do you deal with with the phenomenon itself." Anyway, my son hasn't lived at home for a long time (he and his woman friend have been living together for a while), but I'll reply anyway.

How do you make sure your kids do not find out about your lifestyle?

Probably the best principle to be aware of is: children, like women, always know what's going on in their own home. If they aren't aware initially... because, perhaps, they're too young... sooner or later they'll figure it out. Thus, the worst strategy is to lie to your children, where "lying" includes implying or pretending you aren't doing what you're doing even if you don't lie explicitly. Lying will cause your children to conclude you're hypocritical and they'll lose respect for you.

Now that my daughter is not a toddler anymore, I do not want her to: A.) find out, so B.) her sexual psyche is damaged. Any advice from men or women would be appreciated.

Why do you assume that if your daughter finds out how you and your husband live as adults, that will damage her sexual psyche? Children, like adults, are capable of handling the truth and greatly prefer doing so to being lied to. Since your daughter is 11 and approaching puberty, it's time for you and your husband to begin informing her, in factual ways, how you and he... and, by implication, your daughter in the future... live as adult woman and husband. That is, you date a variety of other men while your husband is faithful to you as your cuckold.

Probably the most important consideration to convey to your daughter is that she should not talk about the sexuality of your and your husband's relationship with her friends, teachers or Sunday-school teachers (if any).

—Custer

 

[duke9555]

here's my advice .....always listen to strangers opinions on
internet message boards about critical stuff that can affect
the lives of innocent children ; )

 

[Custer Laststand]

Your question has been of interest to others...

Ms. Cat—

A while back a thread on the subject of interest to you was initiated by Fred (user name "ffred") in Germany. He and his wife Nadine were trying to resolve the problem of how to bring up and discuss with their (at the time) 21 year-old daughter her mother's cuckolding of him. Their daughter, who was no longer living at home, had returned home somewhat early in the morning... as it turned out... and found her mother still in bed with her lover, and her father sleeping on the couch. They also have a son (25 at the time), who apparently remained ******* of all that or did not want to hear about it.

Fred’s thread, here:

http://www.cuckolds.com/forums/general-cuckoldry/11114-living-cuckold-lifestyle-children-home.html

included some fairly-extended discussion that may be of interest to you, although his and Nadine’s children are significantly older than yours.

—Custer

 

[babyruthiezhubby]

Ruthie and I have a little different situation because of Ruthie's website but 3 years ago my 16 yr found out about us. worried about us and thinking her parents were perverts she told her other three siblings who in turn were worried so they went to Grandma about it who in turn discussed it with Ruthie's parents. Trust me this is not something you want to go through. Pick your play times carefully and never play at home. if one person in the family finds out the whole family will know within a week and all of them will want to have a little talk with you. every one will think your wife is cheating and the marriage is going to hell. The rumors will eventually spread all over town.

Be careful

Baby Ruthie- The hottest amateur slut

 

[SoonToBe]

Our experience with kids being at home is that if you don't let things change your home experience and life with your kids - that they are generally too busy with their own lives to read too much into what their parents are doing.

We've always opted for discretion but also making sure that whatever goes on seems "normal" and not something that they need to be worried about. My personal thinking is that kids pick up on what their parents project to them. That is where they pick up their insecurities from. If mom and dad act normally, then our experience is that the kids don't think too much about it.

I know others here may disagree but that is how it's seemed to us and how we've worked it out. We've never played at home when they've been home and that's a rule we will not bend on.

 

[babyruthiezhubby]

Our experience with kids being at home is that if you don't let things change your home experience and life with your kids - that they are generally too busy with their own lives to read too much into what their parents are doing.

We've always opted for discretion but also making sure that whatever goes on seems "normal" and not something that they need to be worried about. My personal thinking is that kids pick up on what their parents project to them. That is where they pick up their insecurities from. If mom and dad act normally, then our experience is that the kids don't think too much about it.

I know others here may disagree but that is how it's seemed to us and how we've worked it out. We've never played at home when they've been home and that's a rule we will not bend on.

That sounds like the best advice I've heard.

 

[she_likes_2_be_touched]

Thanks......

Thanks to everyone who posted a reply. I am feeling better about the situation knowing that others have been through or going through the same thing.

As a parent my children are my number # 1 concern and I just don't want to do anything that might affect my kids in a negative way... I especially do not want to set ideas in my childrens head that something is wrong with "us" because mom wants to have sex with other men and "S" wants to do me after or lick me clean. My theory has always been if it doesn't hurt anyone and "all" are in agreement then it is ok...no matter what sexually it is.

I do have agree with the last couple who said there one stead fast rule was they don't "play" at home when the kids are there. I agree!! My daughter is bad about walking into our room as it is...I could only imagne her walking in and seeing another guy eating me out or doing me doggie!!

Im just not ready to explain something like that to this child. We will just have to be super careful should things head back in that direction. I guess for now I will just have to diligant and make sure to cover my tracks!!

Custer...thanks for the link...It was very imfomative. If my children were older and out of the house then I think honesty would be the best policy, but since that is not the case I think mums the word!

Cat

 

[babyruthiezhubby]

Thanks to everyone who posted a reply. I am feeling better about the situation knowing that others have been through or going through the same thing.

As a parent my children are my number # 1 concern and I just don't want to do anything that might affect my kids in a negative way... I especially do not want to set ideas in my childrens head that something is wrong with "us" because mom wants to have sex with other men and "S" wants to do me after or lick me clean. My theory has always been if it doesn't hurt anyone and "all" are in agreement then it is ok...no matter what sexually it is.

I do have agree with the last couple who said there one stead fast rule was they don't "play" at home when the kids are there. I agree!! My daughter is bad about walking into our room as it is...I could only imagne her walking in and seeing another guy eating me out or doing me doggie!!

Im just not ready to explain something like that to this child. We will just have to be super careful should things head back in that direction. I guess for now I will just have to diligant and make sure to cover my tracks!!

Custer...thanks for the link...It was very imfomative. If my children were older and out of the house then I think honesty would be the best policy, but since that is not the case I think mums the word!

Cat

Honesty is never the best policy when it comes to your kids. your sex life is your business, It's none of there business and has nothing to do with with your children no matter what age they are.

 

[Tammy Pantedrop]

You should start being more assertive all around. Start to teach / show your daughter that all women should be allowed to do what they want. Lightly and Tamely begin to belittle your husbands size and abilites in front of them. Begin to make both your husband and son take on "Most All" the house work. While you and your daughter relax in front of the TV, Play WII, or just go shopping. Soon they will begin to get the idea, You Rule the House, and when the day finally comes for you to start to "DATE", It won't come as a surprise. You might even get to the point where you can ask your daughters opion of your choices of boyfriends you've chatted with or from the adds you've placed.

 

[he_likes_2_watch]

tamme your a sick person to be like that, kids should not be involved in this lifestyle, i would gladly quit this lifestyle then do that, me gainign pleasure should not be at the cost of messing her kids up

 

[Tammy Pantedrop]

Your not openly envolving them. Your just showing them that MOM is a Strong, Independant Woman, Who gets her way!! As for the daughter, girls alway mature earlier anyway. This will take years to do. So by the time MOM starts to date the "children" should already know what the deal is.

 

[babyruthiezhubby]

You should start being more assertive all around. Start to teach / show your daughter that all women should be allowed to do what they want. Lightly and Tamely begin to belittle your husbands size and abilites in front of them. Begin to make both your husband and son take on "Most All" the house work. While you and your daughter relax in front of the TV, Play WII, or just go shopping. Soon they will begin to get the idea, You Rule the House, and when the day finally comes for you to start to "DATE", It won't come as a surprise. You might even get to the point where you can ask your daughters opion of your choices of boyfriends you've chatted with or from the adds you've placed.

You want her to belittle the children's father sexually in front of them.

Your a fucking idiot!!!

You can live in your fantasy land all you want but when you advise people to involve children in any way it makes you a sick fuck that needs to be bitch slapped. Which is something I'm sure you would enjoy and want your children to watch....

People like you have never done anything real in your whole life. You live in your fantasy cyber world and think because you have a cute name like Tammy pantedrop that you have the expertise to advise others to do things that you are to chicken shit to do yourself... Other than in your sick fucking mind.

If I've been rude in any way. I don't really give a shit!!! you deserve it.

 

[he_likes_2_watch]

yes

Yes I agree sick person. Some people don't know how to separate fantasy from real. Just advertising that is truly disgusting. Probably a man posting under a woman's name. Thanks for me not having to be mean and having to tell someone off. It's sad we are real and trying to post on this site but people like her is reason why real people leave this site and its full of sick people

 

[babyruthiezhubby]

Yes I agree sick person. Some people don't know how to separate fantasy from real. Just advertising that is truly disgusting. Probably a man posting under a woman's name. Thanks for me not having to be mean and having to tell someone off. It's sad we are real and trying to post on this site but people like her is reason why real people leave this site and its full of sick people

hahaha. Don't worry. you can always count on me to tell sick fucks off. Most here are living a fantasy because they are to afraid to live it for real. You'll find that with the exception of a few here that actually have lived the life style for years and know the good and bad involved, most here are fake fantasy cuckolds that have read a few sick books on the subject but never had the nerve to actually live the life they preach too others. Although you will get some great advice here from a few.

 

[babyruthiezhubby]

he likes 2 watch it sounds like you and your husband are good parents. I have confidence that you will find the perfect balance.

My wife Ruthie and I are sort of outsiders here ourselves. We are more wife sharers than cuckolds. We do it for the fun of it more than anything. Which no matter what you call it I sense is what you and your husband are looking for

 

[she_likes_2_be_touched]

WOW...they let any sickos on here huh?

Wooohooo Thanks BabyRuthiezhubby for the tongue lashing you gave Tammy!! I would never belittle my man in front of the kids nor would want my kids to be raised thinking its ok to treat your spouse/mate like that.
That is definately NOT a healthy relationship going on at their house!!
Yes, he_likes_2_watch and I will not be following her advice.....

Thanks again to everyone who sounded off on this subject. I agree that some people definately live in a fantasy world on here.... Least I am smart enough to realize it and don't buy into it!!!

Cat

 

[babyruthiezhubby]

Sorry I have you 2 mixed up haha. You both sound like good people to me. just be discreet and have fun. No need to feel guilty as long as your children always come first and I know they do. Ruthie and I will go have fun on Friday or Saturday for a few hrs and then do something with the kids on Sunday. even if it's just hang out and mess around. We are a pretty normal family other than our website and fun on the side. Just a little advice. if you don't want you children to find out never, never open a website hahaha. I'm just joking. I know you never would.

Http://www.babyruthie.com

 

[she_likes_2_be_touched]

hahaha

Hahahaha @ Website comment!! That was funny. I think your right...the key word here is "balance".

Thanks for the support. I will check our your site too!!

Cat