Need advice on situation

[jimtakingplung]

First I have to say I love the site. I have been looking at it for a month or so.

That being said I need your advice.

Here is where I am. I am 32 and my wife is 26. She is very beautiful. We have been married for around two years. I met her when she finished college. We moved to Atlanta this past year for my new job. Amber also works part time at a law firm.

A little more information is need to understand Amber. When we met she was starting to settle down. She was really wild in high school and college. She has always been open about that. It has always been on my mind and we have talked about it a few times. I know about most of the guys she has been with.

A few months ago she mentioned that two of the ladies she works with are getting a divorce. The other two were already divorced. I was a little worried, but she said I had nothing to worry about. I knew that but good to here it. The ladies started going out for drinks a few times a week. They asked Amber to go and she finally asked me if I was ok with it and said of course. She told me a little about what went on. The two newly divorced ladies were little wild. One hooked up with a guy and left. The other was all over a guy. The other two just danced a lot. She also danced with a few guys and got a few drinks.

This all led to a discussion about being single. Amber admitted she liked it but was glad to be married. I pried on her to tell me more. She said she hated the waiting on phone calls and worrying if the guy liked her.

A week later the same and she told me about the night and the other girls. That got me thinking and wondering what she was doing. That is when I realized it was turning me on. Now I know I want her to go further but not sure how to proceed. I have read a lot a lot of post to put it all together. I was hoping to get some feedback from my post. I will keep you all up to date on what is going on. Thanks. Jim

You can also email me at jimtakingplung@yahoo.com

I set it up just for this.

 

[NYJOE]

Form what little you said about your wife, it seems that she likes the fact that she is married to you and the security that comes with it.

However. it also appears that she might still long for the single life and the variety of men that come with.

The fact that it is starting to turn you on is somthing you might want to mention to her at an opertune time in a non threatening, playful way, making it clear that you have no interest in other woman.

That will plant the seed.: She can have the best of both worlds.
Take it slow and see how it developes.

 

[Custer Laststand]

Your wife sounds very promising. Here's a plan of action....

Jim,

Welcome! Thanks for your interesting post.

That [introductory comment] being said, I need your advice.

OK.

Here is where I am. I am 32 and my wife is 26.

Those are very good ages for initiating an adulteress wife / cuckold husband marriage.

She is very beautiful. We have been married for around two years. I met her when she finished college. We moved to Atlanta this past year for my new job. Amber also works part time at a law firm.

Amber being a beautiful woman will definitely not work against her. Atlanta is (I infer, from other contributions to this site) an excellent place for your wife to expand her sexual horizons while maintaining the love, support and security of her marriage to you.

A few months ago she mentioned that two of the ladies she works with are getting a divorce. The other two were already divorced. I was a little worried, but she said I had nothing to worry about.

Good. Obviously, your wife is telling you she values her marriage to you. By implication, she is unlikely to blow you off.

They asked Amber to go, and she finally asked me if I was ok with it, and I said of course.

Your wife going out with her newly-unattached woman friends is very promising.... and yours was the right response. You appear to be an enlightened husband.

She told me a little about what went on. The two newly divorced ladies were a little wild. One hooked up with a guy and left. The other was all over a guy. The other two just danced a lot. She also danced with a few guys and got a few drinks.

Cool. Your wife is on her way....

This all led to a discussion about being single. Amber admitted she liked it but was glad to be married. I pried on her to tell me more. She said she hated the waiting on phone calls and worrying if the guy liked her.

Amber is telling you she likes being married to you for the reasons she stated (among others). Her earlier experience as a college student also strongly suggests she likes and enjoys sex.

A week later the same and she told me about the night and the other girls. That got me thinking and wondering what she was doing. That is when I realized it was turning me on. Now I know I want her to go further, but I'm not sure how to proceed.

For a reasonably good plan of action, see the 8-part article that starts here:

» A Wife Into A Hotwife Hot Wife Blog - hotwife and cuckold husband fetish discussion

Also, I suggest referring your wife to:

Scandalous Magazine cuckolding, fashion, beauty, health, sex advice for women

It may help her realize there are lots of women who have made cuckolds of their husbands, enjoy a variety of lovers, and consider it an optimum way to live.

I will keep you all up to date on what is going on.

Good. I'll look forward to hearing more about your wife's progress and experiences, as will many of the rest of us, I'm sure.

Best wishes to both of you—

Custer

 

[greymaster]

Hi Jim

It sounds like you could be at the start of something interesting, but the advice so far has been good - keep the communications open and don't lose anything you value along the way.

Would Amber allow you to post a picture of her? SENSIBLE comments from the members might turn you both on and prompt further discussion of what might be interesting and what is out of the question.

I look forward to hearing more.

 

[Custer Laststand]

A good article on the hotwife / cuckold husband phenomenon

Jimtakingplung,

An article by Cherry Lee (Ph.D.), which was published (so to speak) originally on her now-defunct "New Directions" websight, has been "reprinted" by "Scandalous Women" e-zine. It may be of interest to you and your wife. You can find it here:

PLAYGIRL Scandalous Magazine cuckolding, Playgirl, fashion, beauty, health, sex advice for women

—Custer

 

[jimtakingplung]

Last night

Last weekend Amber went out with her friends from work to a club they go to sometimes. She said they had a good time, but didn't give me much detail.

Tuesday one of her friends came over with her new boyfriend. He is a cool guy that I knew so we grilled out. Joy, her friend, was talking about another girl that goes with them that is always hooking up with the college guys that hang out at the bar. She then mentioned this one guy that is always hitting on Amber. Amber got really red and told her to hush.

I didn't push it while they were there. When they left we were cleaning up and I asked her about it. His name is Matt and she admitted he was cute. He had tried to kiss her a few times but she said that was it.

They went out last night and before she left I told her to have fun and let loose. She said what does that mean. I said don't be a prude. She gave me a me a look and I said hey that is what Joy says about you. She said ya and Joy thinks I should screw Matt to. I said well you don't want to be a prude do you. She just slapped me with the towel she had. I laughed and said well just kiss him and she will back off. She just looked at me. I told her I was ok if she kissed him. It wasn't like she didn't still love me and hey maybe it would get her more drinks. She just laughed me off.

They are going out again tonight and I don't know if I should say anything else. I haven't asked about last night yet and wanted to know what I should do. She is still sleeping since they got in late.

 

[enser]

Hi Jim, your wife will soon be pleasured by Matt’s cock, if it has not happened yet. As long as you get enough pussy, that can work out to be a hot live-style. If you have the room and the facilities, invite the whole gang of those women and their male companions including Matt to a cook out. Then you will meet Matt, see your wife’s taste, If the guy looks respectable and discrete and what you are up against. I don’t know how far you would like to let your wife go, you could also invite Matt alone and have a talk with him. But better to evaluate the guy first. You are young and you don’t need to hurry. By what you wrote, I am sure your wife is no prude and sooner or later she will get her pussy treated.
If she is going out tonight and you would let her know that you are OK with her screwing Matt you can bring that across very discretely. Just ask her if she has any condoms in her purse. She will then protest that you think she goes out to get laid. That’s when you can tell her that you love her that much that you are not mad if she gets pleasured. And anyways one does not know what happens and it is better to be prepared, then sorry

 

[Custer Laststand]

Jimtakingplung,

Enser has given you some good advice — particularly his last paragraph. I second it.

—Custer

 

[becontree2001uk]

Any news JIm? How about showing a pic of Amber?

 

[Ballspanking]

I think your next move could easily be fantasy play when fucking her.
Once she's aroused, whisper in her ear how hot it would be if she let her young stud fuck her.
Let her know you would allow her that and enjoy it too.
If she comes real hard, you have your answer, and build on that.

 

[jimtakingplung]

Update

This may be long, but I want to make sure I get everything up so I get the best advice.

I am home alone and finally have a chance to give everyone an update and get some more advice. A week ago on Saturday Amber went out with her friends. I woke up the next morning and she was not there. Obviously my head was spinning with what was going on. I got really excited. I checked the home phone and nothing. Then my cell and she had sent a text message.

She just said I will be staying with Joy. Little to buzzed to drive. Obviously I was very excited. She got home around noon that Sunday. She didn't say much and I made a few jokes to try to get her to talk. She wouldn't and seemed to be very distant. This really fueled my thoughts.

She was quite the first of the week. Tuesday I was guessing they would go out again. She said she probably wasn't going back again. I finally said I had had enough. What is going on you are acting totally weird around me. I said I don't care if you kissed some one or got fucked in the parking lot. She just looked at me. I started laughing and said sorry. It is killing me to find out why you are acting weird. She said we should talk. I don't know how most people feel, but my heart was in my throat.

She said something did happen but not like what I think. She said after going out Matt, Joy and her boyfriend went back to Joy's house. She said they talked and started a movie. She said she was on the love seat. Ya I know how that sounds. She said Matt was there to.

Joy fell asleep and then her boyfriend said it was time for them to turn in. She said she would stay in the guest room so they didn't have to take her home. She sent me a text. She said they moved to the couch better view of tv. She said she laid down on him. He was stretched out to. Then she started to cry and said she should have stopped it there. I told her it was ok I loved her. She said they were laying there and kept messing with her neck. She loves that.

She said she told him to stop. He stopped but started back. He was rubbing her stomach and messing with her neck then her ear. That is her total weakness. She even mentioned that then. She said she had closed her eyes and then she said he was kissing her before she knew it. She said she blew up on him. Joy came running out and she was crying. She said she totally freaked Matt out. Scared him to death I bet. I have seen her blowups.

He left and Amber and Joy stayed up talking. She didn't want to tell me about what they said. She said that is why she wasn't going out again.

When she stopped I told her I loved her and wasn't at all made. She said she wasn't going to put her self in that position again. I said ok. Then I told her she shouldn't stop going out with her freinds. She just looked at me funny. I said look I figured something like this might happen. I am ok with it. You still love me right. She said ya. I said do you love matt. She said no, you know that. I said ok did you want to kiss him. She said no. I said you are a bad lier. She said I didn't. I said yes you did and its ok. I don't care that you kissed him.

That led to a long discussion about me and if I was cheating on her. Lot of encouragement to prove I wasn't. I told her she should call Joy and go out. I also told her to call Matt and apologize for being a tease. Her eyes got big and said that is what Joy told her. I said just have fun and be careful. I loved her and I wanted to make sure she would always love me.

She went out that night. She also went Thursday, Friday and last night. She hasn't been home since friday night when she left. She told me before she left that she might not. They were suppose to go get their nails done Saturday.

Sorry this is so long, but I wanted to make sure I told you everything so I can get the best advice. I will update you again as soon as I can.

 

[Puller]

Well, if I were you, I would be frantic by now!

Even when mine is being laid to death, she always finds time during an after-sex cigarette to push a few buttons on her cell phone to let me know her general condition.

Are you sure that she understood your talk with her and didn't think you were abandoning her??

 

[OneForSure]

Jim,
I'm new to this, but she is probably feeling pushed by you and her girlfriends. Tell her that she doesn't have to fuck Matt if she doesn't want to, but have fun kissing and let things take their natural course. Matt will continue to push.

One For Sure

 

[jimtakingplung]

Need advice

Thanks for the advice. I am not pushing it. I am wondering if I should. Should I say I want her to. That is what I am wanting to know about.

 

[ffred]

Even when mine is being laid to death, she always finds time during an after-sex cigarette to push a few buttons on her cell phone to let me know her general condition.

Are you sure that she understood your talk with her and didn't think you were abandoning her??

First of all, congratulation to you. It seems that you used the right time to implement the new lifestyle into your marriage. When I read you comments, I get the feeling that you enjoy the change and that you always had the intention to proceed like you told us.

BUT I fully agree with Puller, there is a need for you to have more open and detailed discussions. I am also not sure that Amber understood your discussion. In my opinion it is your responsibility to make yourself clear that you would give her the freedom to decide by herself about her lovers AND you accept every decision she takes. Also you have to explain her that you like this procedure and you have to make clear where your advantages are in your newly created lifestyle.

I wish you all the best for your future adventures

fred

 

[jimtakingplung]

Thanks Fred

Fred,

Thanks for the words of encouragement. I am just a little afraid of moving to fast and turning her off of the idea. Part of me thinks it would be best to just let her fall in to it you know.

I would love to just put some condoms in her purse and tell her to fuck her brains out. But, I am also sure that would turn her off. I know that is not what you mean. I will give this some thought. I hope others will post some advice to. It is always good to hear others opinions to.

First of all, congratulation to you. It seems that you used the right time to implement the new lifestyle into your marriage. When I read you comments, I get the feeling that you enjoy the change and that you always had the intention to proceed like you told us.

BUT I fully agree with Puller, there is a need for you to have more open and detailed discussions. I am also not sure that Amber understood your discussion. In my opinion it is your responsibility to make yourself clear that you would give her the freedom to decide by herself about her lovers AND you accept every decision she takes. Also you have to explain her that you like this procedure and you have to make clear where your advantages are in your newly created lifestyle.

I wish you all the best for your future adventures

fred

 

[jimtakingplung]

last week

Sorry if this gets long, but again want to have all the facts out there. I think that will get me the best advice. I hope.

Thursday – They went out to a club. Nothing but dancing.

Friday - When I got home from work she was getting ready to go out. I asked here what they were doing and she said she didn't know for sure. But only her and Joy were going out tonight. I told her to be careful and if she needed to stay over to go ahead.

She looked really hot. I did see in her bag that she had one of my favorite dresses packed with some lingerie. Nothing out of the ordinary really. She also had her swimsuit packed. It was her skimpier one. I later found out they laid out at Joys apartment.

Saturday – They got up and went to the pool and get there nails done. Just her and Joy. She said they went in and got ready. She said she didn't know what they were going to go do. She said Joy wanted her to wear this dress she couldn't wear anymore. She tried it on and said it was nice so she agreed. Nothing slutty. Just a sundress. No bra because the back was to low. Joy did her hair up like hers. She said they looked a lot a like.

She said they met Joy's boyfriend and Matt. She said she didn't know they were going to do that. She got little mad at Joy who said it was there second double date a few times. They ate and went to hear a band that Matt knew someone from them.

They went back to Joy's and piled into the guest room. Amber said they changed into some more laxing clothes. I of course poked at her to find out what. She said my shorts and tshirt. I joked at her telling her she is a prude because she said joy just had on a tshirt and panties. It was a long shirt. But still I thought.

She said they piled on the king bed and watched a ball game that was tivoed. That room was apparently set up with surround sound and a nice tv. Her living room is long and it wouldn't fit. Sounded little odd but I was ok with it.

She said she fell asleep during the game and woke when Joy and boyfriend went to bed. She said she didn't know what to do. She said Matt rolled over to look at her and they laid there and talked for like an hour. She said they finally fell asleep and nothing happened.

I also found out that Matt is in school and has a girlfriend that is away at school. That is why he is not after her she said.

Sunday – She came home and was really tired but we got to talk some. I did notice she went outside to talk on the phone. I assumed it was matt on her Cell phone. She was out there a while. I didn't want to push that I noticed.

Monday – Work and she said they were going out Tuesday.

Tuesday – The whole group for work went out just a girls night out. She got picked on about Matt by the ladies. Joy had been keeping them in the loop. She got in little early.

Wednesday – Work and we chatted after dinner. Also had some of the best sex we have had since honeymoon. She asked if I minded her staying at Joy's till Sunday. She said she didn't want to drive after drinking and they might have to work friday or saturday.

So that is where I am. I was disappointed nothing more happened but I guess it takes time. What do you all think. Should I push it more or less.

 

[Puller]

Sounds like it is going just fine but I wish she were a bit more open with you.

It could be that she is just teasing you and being coy, expecting you to find out what is happening.

From your account of the night at Joy's place, it is highly unlikely that Amber spent the night with Matt, listening to Joy and her lover having intercourse, without enjoying the same themselves. At the least Amber sucked him off, probably several times. Does she like sucking? If "Yes", then she would not have wasted the opportunity.

When she went to the garden to take the call, she probably wanted to tell him how sore she was and how much she enjoyed the love making. Also that you had not found out, or at least, not got angry.

It will be interesting when she comes home from the next trip!

 

[Lil Cuck]

If she has not been with Matt sexually yet, then she is planning it for the weekend she stays at Joy's house. Forgive me if I'm wrong, but you said she wanted to stay at Joy's house from Thursday night to Sunday? She and her friend Joy have something planned. It sounds like a little romantic adulterous affair to me. Nothing wrong with that. But you are running a borderline of her keeping secrets and actually cheating on you instead of the desired outcome of her being pleased by her man or men, then cucking you by giving you the details.

I will give you a bit of advice that worked for me and my wife. I don't know if it will work for you. We started out as swingers. We would go to swingers clubs and meet couples off the net. That progressed into it being easier to find men instead of couples. Then it progressed into it being easier to find men if I stayed home. That's what worked for us. It was a much easier transition.

 

[xdressisy]

caution

Hi Jim,

Seems to me your wife is viewing this differently than you are. She has guilt over it and clearly loves you and may be interpreting your encouragement to have sex witrh other men as you don't want her. You can bet her "friends" are pointing her in that direction for their own personal agendas.

I tend to agree with Mac that you should build your marriage and marital trust before you go down this road otherwise your going to lose your wife. I would act quickly here too.. nix Joy and the weekends, spend some time with her and do something fun.

Just my opinion of course.

cheerio,

xd