shocked wife

[tom here]

Most of that was spot on

Alexis,

Many of the men who are cuckolds or fantasize about being one, like myself, have feeling of inadequacy. That's what leads us to thinking about our wives being with a bigger and dominant man who can please like we think that she needs.

You should actually feel fortunate that this is the kind of porn your husband is looking at. He could be lusting after other women and fantasizing about them like most men. Instead, his fantasies are centered around you and your pleasure. He obviously gets a lot of his sexual pleasure from knowing that you are sexually satisfied. So think about that when you have your discussion with him. It might put your mind at ease a little.

Not sure that I would agree with everything in paragraph one.

Sure, many cucks do have genuine feelings of inadequacy, and cuckolding gives them a safe channel and outlet for those feelings which allows those feelings to become a source of pleasure, it's actually a very good and positive way of maintaining good mental health, a sort of self administered therapy.

Other cucks don't truly feel inadequate, even though they may think and behave in that way, at least sexually, I believe that there is actually a lot of subconscious role play going on with the cuckold.

Also of course, it's very important to differentiate between feelings of sexual inadequacy, and real world general feelings of inadequacy, whether real or imagined.

Ahhhhh, now paragraph number two, you totally hit the nail on the head with that one.

Cuckolds are usually totally, and solely, obsessed with their wives, and with the wife's pleasure. They are really far more interested in the wife's pleasure than they are in their own.

They obtain their pleasure vicariously through the activities of their wife, and they take great pleasure and pride in showing their trust in their wives and from giving them the unselfish gift of total trust and guilt free sexual freedom.

Cuckolds are intensely devoted to their wives, that's the whole point of cuckolding, and it's one of its most fundamental aspects and motivations, they have no interest in other women.

Wives are often, and understandably, confused and puzzled by this seemingly contradictory behaviour, but nevertheless it is true.

Also, Alexis speaks as if her husband chose these feelings, he didn't, no cuck ever does, nor does he probably understand how or why he has these feelings.

Can anyone explain any of their personal preferences ?.

Their choice of food, of clothing, of car, I doubt it, we all like what we like for various reasons, and probably, most of us have no idea how or why our preferences came about, and couldn't explain them if we had to.

 

[5inchwhite]

Not sure that I would agree with everything in paragraph one.

Sure, many cucks do have genuine feelings of inadequacy, and cuckolding gives them a safe channel and outlet for those feelings which allows those feelings to become a source of pleasure, it's actually a very good and positive way of maintaining good mental health, a sort of self administered therapy.

Other cucks don't truly feel inadequate, even though they may think and behave in that way, at least sexually, I believe that there is actually a lot of subconscious role play going on with the cuckold.

Also of course, it's very important to differentiate between feelings of sexual inadequacy, and real world general feelings of inadequacy, whether real or imagined.

Ahhhhh, now paragraph number two, you totally hit the nail on the head with that one.

Cuckolds are usually totally, and solely, obsessed with their wives, and with the wife's pleasure. They are really far more interested in the wife's pleasure than they are in their own.

They obtain their pleasure vicariously through the activities of their wife, and they take great pleasure and pride in showing their trust in their wives and from giving them the unselfish gift of total trust and guilt free sexual freedom.

Cuckolds are intensely devoted to their wives, that's the whole point of cuckolding, and it's one of its most fundamental aspects and motivations, they have no interest in other women.

Wives are often, and understandably, confused and puzzled by this seemingly contradictory behaviour, but nevertheless it is true.

Also, Alexis speaks as if her husband chose these feelings, he didn't, no cuck ever does, nor does he probably understand how or why he has these feelings.

Can anyone explain any of their personal preferences ?.

Their choice of food, of clothing, of car, I doubt it, we all like what we like for various reasons, and probably, most of us have no idea how or why our preferences came about, and couldn't explain them if we had to.

Quite possibly best post ive ever read here. Hopefully alexis takes great notice of this one.

 

[wiseone]

Alexis,

I would like to 1st say that you have been remarkably resilient to some cruel remarks so far. Some folks on here just want their quick fun (if you know what I mean) and not even care about the "real" people who have genuine concerns about their loved ones experimenting in this lifestyle, or who have this fantasy. Well, enough of that, let me give you some of my background and why I am in to this whole thing.

I have been happily married to my beautiful wife for 5 years now. I have only recently (past 6 months) embraced this fantasy of my wife having an intimate relationship with an African American lover. For me, it is as much (if not more) about my wife's pleasures than my own. I am not your husband, but it is possible that he does in fact, have the fantasy of envisioning you in the throws of absolute passion with a black lover. I have this fantasy because I love my wife truly with all my heart, and want her to have the fullest, and most powerful sexual experiences in our marriage. For me, I am not exactly small but I do realize that certain African Americans simply have a tremendous sexual energy, stamina, and pleasure-giving ability for white women. So much, that they will put their own satisfaction second to the married wife's pleasure. And, for me, it's not about me being humiliated or any of that crap, I just want her to have the best sex of her life! I don't think that would mean that we would cease to have sex, but it would mean that she could enjoy sex much more than we currently do. Who knows, he may simply have your happiness in mind? I'm still not sure exactly how this will pan out for us, as I am slowly testing the waters with her about this subject. But, I can tell that you are a kind, sensitive, and genuine person that wants to keep your marriage secure above all else, and that is commendable in this day and age. Sorry about the novel!

 

[tazlovecock]

Hi Alex, What is wrong with your husband looking at something different? You cant blame a man for being curious. How did you happen to stumble on this site? Did you stay on long enough and look around to see all the beautiful interracial sex that goes on here? Browse around and it may open new doors for you and your husband.:clap:

 

[HerCunt4AllBBC]

IRAddicted-A Lone Rational Mind

Normally I am unaffected by the prevalence of non critical thinking in our culture. This Alexis post or more specifically the attention given to her posts had me ready to pull my hair out. From the moment this INNOCENT, NAIVE, SHOCKED wife queried the board I wanted to tell her (or him), nice try but you are a little to high and the BS meter to deserve a serious answer. Are you people kidding me????? Anybody that is so bound by our hypocritical cultures, as well as the unfortunate stranglehold our mainstream religeons have on the minds adults, especially on the "sanctity" of marriage, would NEVER seek advice from the perverts and sociopaths that frequent a morally bankrupt site like this. Does anyone really believe that such a brainwashed, puritanical, automaton would seek advice on how to handle her husband who has wandered off the blissful path to happiness and love only a monogamous, marriage vow constrained union can provide. The last place she is going to seek answers from is a site infected with such perversion and deviancy.
Believe her and I bet you believe 19 Arabs who weren't competent to pilot a Cessna 172 took out the WTC and blasted a section of the Pentagon. Good luck people. Again THANK YOU IRaddicted!!

 

[susan]

All I see is 14 days of posting and a supposed heavy heart when all she had to do is ask her man in a nice way what the deal is.............soap opera

 

[wiseone]

Don't break your arm patting yourself on the back.

Amen. Jeez dude, if it bothers you that much why reply? Is anyone holding a gun to your head to continue reading the posts? This urks me that now this thread (like most on here) become broken apart from the original poster's intent, and turns into a fake or not fake debate. WHO CARES!!!??? If someone starts the dialogue and others reply to it, let it be. I don't care if the person (he or she) is a fake. I agree that most of the possible "real ones" end up being fake, but jeez give me a break, just let the posts be what they are.

 

[lewis]

Normally I am unaffected by the prevalence of non critical thinking in our culture. This Alexis post or more specifically the attention given to her posts had me ready to pull my hair out. From the moment this INNOCENT, NAIVE, SHOCKED wife queried the board I wanted to tell her (or him), nice try but you are a little to high and the BS meter to deserve a serious answer. Are you people kidding me????? Anybody that is so bound by our hypocritical cultures, as well as the unfortunate stranglehold our mainstream religeons have on the minds adults, especially on the "sanctity" of marriage, would NEVER seek advice from the perverts and sociopaths that frequent a morally bankrupt site like this. Does anyone really believe that such a brainwashed, puritanical, automaton would seek advice on how to handle her husband who has wandered off the blissful path to happiness and love only a monogamous, marriage vow constrained union can provide. The last place she is going to seek answers from is a site infected with such perversion and deviancy.
Believe her and I bet you believe 19 Arabs who weren't competent to pilot a Cessna 172 took out the WTC and blasted a section of the Pentagon. Good luck people. Again THANK YOU IRaddicted!!

You may have a point,,,afterall she keep comming back, and back, and back, and back, so either she is a fake or she is affair to admit she is interested in black cock.

 

[bbclover]

Amen to that, Lewis.

 

[kelvinsmith10]

thank you very much i agree

Normally I am unaffected by the prevalence of non critical thinking in our culture. This Alexis post or more specifically the attention given to her posts had me ready to pull my hair out. From the moment this INNOCENT, NAIVE, SHOCKED wife queried the board I wanted to tell her (or him), nice try but you are a little to high and the BS meter to deserve a serious answer. Are you people kidding me????? Anybody that is so bound by our hypocritical cultures, as well as the unfortunate stranglehold our mainstream religeons have on the minds adults, especially on the "sanctity" of marriage, would NEVER seek advice from the perverts and sociopaths that frequent a morally bankrupt site like this. Does anyone really believe that such a brainwashed, puritanical, automaton would seek advice on how to handle her husband who has wandered off the blissful path to happiness and love only a monogamous, marriage vow constrained union can provide. The last place she is going to seek answers from is a site infected with such perversion and deviancy.
Believe her and I bet you believe 19 Arabs who weren't competent to pilot a Cessna 172 took out the WTC and blasted a section of the Pentagon. Good luck people. Again THANK YOU IRaddicted!!

Thank you very much i agree, not about the wtc or pentagon but seeking answers for something you think is so peverse from people that live it

 

[Alexis]

First of all, I'd like to say thanks for all the comments, suggestions and insights. Some have really helped me. I've been very busy this whole week and am today as well. I won't have time to respond to individual posts, but I will do that if and when I post next week. Tomorrow is the day I will have THE talk with my husband.

If this whole thing blows up on me or for any other reason I decide not to return to this site, thanks again. As of now I plan to post next week.

 

[billy-ray]

Unacceptable Alexis. You cannot decide to just not return.

I'm sure you noticed a good amount of doubt regarding your authenticity (most of it reasonable), but why take it personal? Alexis isn't even your real name. On the other hand, you also received a butt-load of constructive and concerned suggestions (which at least in theory, could benefit an x number of people in your (assumed) situation. For me it's logically obvious why you kept us abreast for two weeks: You were being helped in the comforts and security of privacy. I could sense from the very beginning your embarrassment of this ordeal. With the goodie-two-shoe persona that you've masterfully honed your entire life could never withstand the shame and scrutiny you fear so. You came here because you could go nowhere else -not even the man you vowed to love and obey, cherish and care for, sponge wash and blow dry. Your world would have fallen apart if ANYONE in your social circle found out what turns hubby on. The fact of matter is that YOU don't even know in detail... until tomorrow.

In short, you owe us the out-come hun and I thank you in advance.

 

[billy-ray]

Bless you!

 

[Mike W.]

Alexis,

I think your own words sum you up the best and I feel bad your for your husband. You wrote : "Also, before this gets any further along, I think he should know that whatever his interests are, I am NOT interested. "

That seems to be a great marriage you have there. ITs too bad your husband feels the need to not communicate with you about any of his fantasies becasue he knows your response.

I would venture to guess he has been on many many other porn sites as well and because of this you havea problem? Wake up, its 2009. Porn is good.

 

[CJ6767]

Please do let us know how it went...thanks,
Karla

 

[Pictureofagirl]

Some things are better left unsaid...

 

[faust1]

my wife is not into my fantasies of thisl ifestyle, but i HAVE COMMUNICATED my desires. i have shared with her who i am. consequently i am not cheating or sneaking around. this is important. people who love eachother accept even the things they don't like about their partners.

 

[UKBlkManLuvsMwf]

Is this thread still going? Is Alexis still playin the enabler to her Hubby's wanton Interracial sexual desires?

We will find out in the next episode of - "Dark Cavern - The Mini Series!

 

[MichaelWills]

And the Update is?

Just to recap per my understanding:

Alexis discovered her husband had visited Dark Cavern. -- And was shocked. ("My goodness how long has this been going on!")

She surfed the site, --was still shocked futher--and registered as a member and posted a thread, soliciting advice.

After roughly 3 weeks of ignoring advice that she needed to talk to him about it, she then says she will mention it to him--and post back the response. A day that she said could change her life forever? Still not update on that conversation.

One has to wonder how that conversation would have gone for most of us:

Wife: Honey, I noticed on your computer that you went to an interracial sex site. Why are you going there?
Hub: Because it has hot photos of white women getting black dick. I think it's hot.
Wife: Well by Gawd, I just want you to know that I'm never going to do that.
Hub: OK. Can I go back to watching the ballgame now?

Sounds like a real life changer to me.

This is a classic case of a non-problem being mind-fucked into one by dwelling on it.

If the husband hitting a porn site is causing any wife to take three weeks to work up the courage to mention it I would suggest that that couple seriously needs some professional marriage counseling on open communication-- and not the kind we offer for free in these forums.

And by the way, I defy any woman to surf this site on a regular basis for three weeks and no matter what she says, do not become a little intrigued with wondering what it would be like to get some black cock.

 

[karenhw]

Hi Alexis, I guess the question is are you curious or interested in this? we talked about this for a long time before we did anything. now I wonder why we waited!?!