Denial discussion
- Thread starterSoonToBe
- Start date
Just a short update for right now. Yes, Dana, things are still on schedule for us over the Christmas-New Year holiday.
But before that, we talked more about her and Robert and she said that while their regular schedule might change, she did say that they'd agreed that either of them might contact the other. Sue said it's one of the first times she can remember where she actually would want to call him for sex. I wasn't sure what she'd meant and she said that Robert is one of the first guys who she'd would probably always want more sex with. She giggled and looked at me and said I had no one to blame but myself - that she likes having him as a lover and that she'd probably always want to be with him - what she said was that she knew it was going to happen sooner or later and she even speculated that maybe it's how she's feeling that helped me admit what I did. She wondered if it was what she was doing and feeling/wanting with Robert that led me to admit what I did about myself and what I wanted. She said that she'd been thinking that maybe I felt good about the 2 of them and maybe it all felt right that I could let myself finally tell her what I did. She looked at me and said "I know all of this stuff with the condoms really turns you on" and she held my hand and told me that it really turned her on too.
It was obvious she'd wanted to talk about all of this and that again, the timing was right so that this time, she felt like she could talk openly. She said that for her, all of this has brought back to her feelings of excitement and eagerness for me. She said that as crazy as it is, that she finds herself feeling horny for me, sometimes because I'll use a condom with her. She says she orgasms like crazy with me - but she held my hand and said that I should know that she doesn't feel it all - and as she said it, she added that it makes her want to find another guy - and she kissed me and said that I should know that it makes her want to find another guy to give her the one moment, the one feeling that she feels almost a longing for when we're done. She kissed me and asked me if that was what I wanted, to make her want that and to make her want it with another guy if I won't. I know it was a bit of playing up the intensity of the moment but she came out and said that she misses the feeling of her man cumming in her. She kissed me and she said that "only my main man, 'my primary sexual partner', can give me that".
I'm sure she said it and played it up for my arousal and edification - but I also know that it is the truth. As we started to make love and I entered her with the condom on - I became VERY aware of how she felt but also what I couldn't feel. Granted, once we were really going at it, it didn't make all that much difference - the polyurethane condoms are VERY thin - and my god did she squeal in pleasure many times. As we got into a rhythm she smiled up at me and could feel that I needed to cum - she always says that my cock has a thickness and a firmness to it that she can long tell means I really need it. She giggled at me and said "you know, maybe in another few weeks, you know - you can do with out this" and she grasped at the condom on my cock. I moaned at her in response and she said "that way you can be like the other guys I see who I trust and don't need to use one".
She looked up at me to see my eyes bulging out of my head at what she was saying. And that was when she tied it all together - she moaned and said "then you can really make me cum at the end". I was moaning and groaning - but what was even more arousing was just how wet and open her pussy felt - even with the condom on I could feel her response to her own fantasies and her own words. I fucked her as deeply and firmly as I could as she pushed back up at me each time. She held her own knees back and way apart for me and I could feel her on the verge of a huge orgasm as she moaned back and said "oh god I wish I could feel your cum in me". And with that she started to moan and shake and that was it - I plunged in deeply and started to cum. I seemed to time each thrust with another spurt and it felt awesome to feel and hear her in response.
It felt like it lasted for minutes - I know it was seconds but then again, by the time we both caught our breath and ended our post-fuck hug, it seemed like it was 20 minutes later. I pulled back a bit and she moaned and quickly slid her hand down and grasped the condom that would have otherwise slid off my softened cock as I pulled out of her. She moaned as I pulled free and both of us looked down at what I thought was an obscene amount of cum in the condom. Her eyes closed for a second as she pulled it off of me and held it in her hand and she pinched the tip with her fingers. When they opened again she put the wet condom aside and pulled me in for a hug.
But before that, we talked more about her and Robert and she said that while their regular schedule might change, she did say that they'd agreed that either of them might contact the other. Sue said it's one of the first times she can remember where she actually would want to call him for sex. I wasn't sure what she'd meant and she said that Robert is one of the first guys who she'd would probably always want more sex with. She giggled and looked at me and said I had no one to blame but myself - that she likes having him as a lover and that she'd probably always want to be with him - what she said was that she knew it was going to happen sooner or later and she even speculated that maybe it's how she's feeling that helped me admit what I did. She wondered if it was what she was doing and feeling/wanting with Robert that led me to admit what I did about myself and what I wanted. She said that she'd been thinking that maybe I felt good about the 2 of them and maybe it all felt right that I could let myself finally tell her what I did. She looked at me and said "I know all of this stuff with the condoms really turns you on" and she held my hand and told me that it really turned her on too.
It was obvious she'd wanted to talk about all of this and that again, the timing was right so that this time, she felt like she could talk openly. She said that for her, all of this has brought back to her feelings of excitement and eagerness for me. She said that as crazy as it is, that she finds herself feeling horny for me, sometimes because I'll use a condom with her. She says she orgasms like crazy with me - but she held my hand and said that I should know that she doesn't feel it all - and as she said it, she added that it makes her want to find another guy - and she kissed me and said that I should know that it makes her want to find another guy to give her the one moment, the one feeling that she feels almost a longing for when we're done. She kissed me and asked me if that was what I wanted, to make her want that and to make her want it with another guy if I won't. I know it was a bit of playing up the intensity of the moment but she came out and said that she misses the feeling of her man cumming in her. She kissed me and she said that "only my main man, 'my primary sexual partner', can give me that".
I'm sure she said it and played it up for my arousal and edification - but I also know that it is the truth. As we started to make love and I entered her with the condom on - I became VERY aware of how she felt but also what I couldn't feel. Granted, once we were really going at it, it didn't make all that much difference - the polyurethane condoms are VERY thin - and my god did she squeal in pleasure many times. As we got into a rhythm she smiled up at me and could feel that I needed to cum - she always says that my cock has a thickness and a firmness to it that she can long tell means I really need it. She giggled at me and said "you know, maybe in another few weeks, you know - you can do with out this" and she grasped at the condom on my cock. I moaned at her in response and she said "that way you can be like the other guys I see who I trust and don't need to use one".
She looked up at me to see my eyes bulging out of my head at what she was saying. And that was when she tied it all together - she moaned and said "then you can really make me cum at the end". I was moaning and groaning - but what was even more arousing was just how wet and open her pussy felt - even with the condom on I could feel her response to her own fantasies and her own words. I fucked her as deeply and firmly as I could as she pushed back up at me each time. She held her own knees back and way apart for me and I could feel her on the verge of a huge orgasm as she moaned back and said "oh god I wish I could feel your cum in me". And with that she started to moan and shake and that was it - I plunged in deeply and started to cum. I seemed to time each thrust with another spurt and it felt awesome to feel and hear her in response.
It felt like it lasted for minutes - I know it was seconds but then again, by the time we both caught our breath and ended our post-fuck hug, it seemed like it was 20 minutes later. I pulled back a bit and she moaned and quickly slid her hand down and grasped the condom that would have otherwise slid off my softened cock as I pulled out of her. She moaned as I pulled free and both of us looked down at what I thought was an obscene amount of cum in the condom. Her eyes closed for a second as she pulled it off of me and held it in her hand and she pinched the tip with her fingers. When they opened again she put the wet condom aside and pulled me in for a hug.
SoonToBe said:
Steve, It seems incredible to me, that Sue, and especially Robert, would consider continuing their affair, even after he establishes a serious relationship with his new girlfriend, and would be having her coming to his home.
By now, Robert's neighbors know all about the screams and moans, that come from his house when Sue is there. They know when she comes and when she goes. How then can he bring a new woman into his life, and home, while still fucking Sue there, and keep his new girlfriend from finding out about Sue. If Robert is the kind of serious gentleman that Sue knew in the beginning, he would also be that kind of man with a woman he wanted for a mother of his children. Why then would he set himself up for failure in his second marriage too.
Maybe Sue has an answer to that?? Where would they go, other than his home. Is your son's bedroom still available?
Just asking, harry
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Harry - not sure I like the tone of your comment regarding my sons bedroom.
I don't think Sue is one to pursue it with him because of the reasons you've stated - she is still a woman and I know that when she's not thinking of sex, that she wants the best for him. But to hear her admit that she would welcome it if he pursued her is what rang strong in my ear. You raise valid points that I think would more be Robert's to figure out. I can mention them to her but she seems to still be smitten by her fun with him, enough that - for now at least - she will use him in play between us.
Our conversation continued into yesterday when she told me of several after-work outings that she planned on attending. Friday 12/13 and Wednesday 12/18 were two that she mentioned. I know what she's getting at as she later confirmed that Tony will be at both of them. I joked with her about whether I could join them there and she giggled that I could if I wanted - and then added "but you'd better plan on being alone at times" and she kissed me and said that she's almost sure she wants to try to coax Tony into a little fun. But more on that later.
GTR
I don't think Sue is one to pursue it with him because of the reasons you've stated - she is still a woman and I know that when she's not thinking of sex, that she wants the best for him. But to hear her admit that she would welcome it if he pursued her is what rang strong in my ear. You raise valid points that I think would more be Robert's to figure out. I can mention them to her but she seems to still be smitten by her fun with him, enough that - for now at least - she will use him in play between us.
Our conversation continued into yesterday when she told me of several after-work outings that she planned on attending. Friday 12/13 and Wednesday 12/18 were two that she mentioned. I know what she's getting at as she later confirmed that Tony will be at both of them. I joked with her about whether I could join them there and she giggled that I could if I wanted - and then added "but you'd better plan on being alone at times" and she kissed me and said that she's almost sure she wants to try to coax Tony into a little fun. But more on that later.
GTR
SoonToBe said:
Steve, I'm certainly not the first to question you about Sue bringing her lovers into the house. Actually this is the first time I have.
I only mentioned the 'son's room' because it's not in use, and not your marriage bed, which you have had problems 'giving up' in the past. I meant no disrespect to you, or your son.
I wasn't giving Sue any reasons, that you have not already given her. I was pointing out that if Robert is the 'sensitive' and 'caring' person, Sue has described from the beginning of their affair, he would do everything he could to keep his potential 'future wife' from finding out about Sue, by seeing Sue somewhere else besides his home, which could include yours.
If you have truly given up your place as Sue's, "Main Man" to Robert, (or any other man she choses,) then she will have sex with him wherever she wants. (You have given that decision to her as well), which may include somewhere in your home, at least when your son and daughter are no longer living there.
I really hope this is what you want, because I think you are giving up much more than you realize right now.
Cheers, Harry
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Harry - sorry I overreacted earlier, I took what you were saying the wrong way.
I see what you're getting at, that should they want to get together in the future, that our house is the logical destination if he is involved with someone else. That is true - but then that assumes that this is going to happen and not merely wishful thinking on Sue's part...
I was intrigued by your last paragraph where you comment on my ceding my role with her and what that entails. Yes, I suppose you're right that it means giving up a lot - but at the same time, what I may not have posted about were her comments on having our times when we'll be more "normal" as something to look forward to with passion and desire - setting them apart from what now seems to have become our norm. In some ways, for me as far as I can think right now - it's actually something that I think could really enrage the passion we now are sharing. I know I'm ceding a lot in some ways, but at the same time, it's been many weeks now and the sex is incredibly fulfilling for both of us - we each admitted that we'd had intense orgasms together but also could admit that for each of us, it left us wanting just that little bit more.
I need to run now.
I see what you're getting at, that should they want to get together in the future, that our house is the logical destination if he is involved with someone else. That is true - but then that assumes that this is going to happen and not merely wishful thinking on Sue's part...
I was intrigued by your last paragraph where you comment on my ceding my role with her and what that entails. Yes, I suppose you're right that it means giving up a lot - but at the same time, what I may not have posted about were her comments on having our times when we'll be more "normal" as something to look forward to with passion and desire - setting them apart from what now seems to have become our norm. In some ways, for me as far as I can think right now - it's actually something that I think could really enrage the passion we now are sharing. I know I'm ceding a lot in some ways, but at the same time, it's been many weeks now and the sex is incredibly fulfilling for both of us - we each admitted that we'd had intense orgasms together but also could admit that for each of us, it left us wanting just that little bit more.
I need to run now.
STB,
I understand that it may be ok for Robert to contact Sue. He may need to work off some frustrations in his early days with a new partner and before either of them fully commit to each other. I think the dynamic of Sue calling Robert is a little more complicated though. As you say, she could well be using the scenario to rev your engine. It did and she certainly knows which buttons to press by now.
In fact I do sometimes wonder just how much of your bedtime conversations can be be taken 100% at face value. Several times she has asked, "Are you ok with this ...." and you have simply agreed. You have asked in the same way with her. The circumstance of the questions encourage short answers without qualification. No "Yes I like it but not if you do X and Y or Z," type comments. Your answers to each other usually inflame passions but may well disguise the nuance of the truth. I think it is for this reason that you don't cede too much control to Sue. At least not yet at least. I think you both know that in a different circumstance you could both collapse a position by saying, with clarity, "Yes, but I never meant my agreement to include xxx."
Or maybe you do have the more detailed conversations afterwards when passions have cooled and thus both know exactly where you have agreed to go?
I understand that it may be ok for Robert to contact Sue. He may need to work off some frustrations in his early days with a new partner and before either of them fully commit to each other. I think the dynamic of Sue calling Robert is a little more complicated though. As you say, she could well be using the scenario to rev your engine. It did and she certainly knows which buttons to press by now.
In fact I do sometimes wonder just how much of your bedtime conversations can be be taken 100% at face value. Several times she has asked, "Are you ok with this ...." and you have simply agreed. You have asked in the same way with her. The circumstance of the questions encourage short answers without qualification. No "Yes I like it but not if you do X and Y or Z," type comments. Your answers to each other usually inflame passions but may well disguise the nuance of the truth. I think it is for this reason that you don't cede too much control to Sue. At least not yet at least. I think you both know that in a different circumstance you could both collapse a position by saying, with clarity, "Yes, but I never meant my agreement to include xxx."
Or maybe you do have the more detailed conversations afterwards when passions have cooled and thus both know exactly where you have agreed to go?
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Harry2614 said:
I suppose this would be another example of Fantasy and Reality colliding. In terms of the Fantasy, yes Robert may very well wish to contact Sue in order to "renew" their former bond. Sue may also desire and even at times long for an "intimate visit" with Robert.
In terms of the Reality of the situation however, Harry hits the nail square on the head. Robert IMO, would have to be foolish to take this sort of a chance (especially given his present circumstances). Here he is trying to establish a new and serious relationship with a woman who he believes COULD possibly become the mother of his highly desired offspring, only to have the new/fragile relationship tank, simply because "Mabel" his nosy neighbor, intercepts the two of them leaving his place to go for a walk, and asks in front of the new girl, "by the way Robbie was that your sister I saw leaving your place last Tuesday afternoon. Funny, she doesn't look anything like you?"
Robert simply cannot afford to put himself in this type of a dilemma.
Also, IMO I think Harry's last question is a valid one. If Robert's house now becomes "off limits" there are few options left. Sue will also be confronted with this same (lack of) choice in terms of potential future hook-ups with Tony. Those being:
1. Washroom sex at work---however, depending on the location and wall construction of the particular Washroom, this may lead to discovery/******** by co-workers.
2. Car sex---however, depending on the particular vehicle and location of the parking lot, space and privacy may be an issue. Also, at least for me, car sex after High-school was just never the same as it was during High-school.
3. Hotel/Motel sex---this would probably be the best option, however, room rates for the better more trustworthy/Bed-bug free ones may be cost prohibitive depending on the frequency of need.
4. Sue/Steve's house---also fair/good option, however, may need to use the back entrance in order to keep out of way of "Mabel's nosy sister" who may be watching from next door.
Well, had the house to ourselves last night and we're both off today so I thought I'd post some updates.
First - I saw all of the consternation about Sue continuing things with Robert. As I mentioned, we had some fun in bed last night and as part of all of that, I asked her what she thought was going to happen. She replied "well, I know what I'd like to have happen" - and she said what I'd shared here, that the 2 of them would somehow find time to get together again. But she then added "I know that's not likely" and she said that she hoped they'd find time for maybe one last time somehow between now and Christmas - but she said she knows that after the holidays, if things are going good for him, then she accepts that it'll probably end - at least for a while. I casually asked her where she envisioned their reunion happening and she said she wasn't sure - at first she said "at his place" and I brought up "are you sure that's a good idea?" - and after we talked for a bit longer she giggled and said "well, maybe you'll finally get to meet him". I didn't understand until she continued and giggled more and said "maybe we'll just come here". It was more a joke from her than anything - but I also felt a bit of seriousness to it, as if to say "if that's the only way we can get together" - but I let it alone since it was pretty much as I'd felt it was - that it was more of a desire from her than a reality.
But it did serve to launch us into our fun last night. She said to me that she'll be in full-family/thanksgiving mode starting today. So when we had the house to ourselves (our son delayed coming home till today because of the weather last night) we took advantage.
She reminded me again that Robert's the first guy she's ever been able to cum with like she does with me. She asked me sort of if that made me happy or how I felt about it. I told her I knew this day was coming and that I'd long wanted her to be able to really let go and be with her lover. It went right along with her comments about how she was enjoying the sex with him a LOT now. We talked about how she felt it was unfair that just as she was able to reach this kind of sexual connection with him, that it has to come to an end. I asked her if perhaps that she knew it was going to end, whether that may have also been what let her feel this way with him. Before she could answer, I told her that I'd seen it developing and I admitted that it was partly what led to my decisions about myself too.
She was very intrigued by that and asked me in this very sexy voice to explain what I meant. This time I used the alpha and beta terms again or a bit more with her. I told her that it really turned me on when I started to see her respond with Robert with him as her alpha-male sexual partner. I told her that her confidence and openness with him had really surprised me - but that it had also made me feel so much closer to her. She hugged me and said that in a crazy way, she felt the same way, that her ability to feel things with Robert hadn't taken away from us - in some ways she says it made her appreciate much more about me - as she said it - that I'm not the only one to give her those types of orgasms and sexual feelings - that in some ways it's made her take much more notice of me elsewhere and see me as more than, and something other than her primary sexual partner. We both almost said the same things at the same time - that somehow, when she allowed herself to fulfill herself with Robert, that it seemed to have changed how we both feel about each other.
She, like me, says that she feels less sexual anxiety with me knowing that she doesn't always need to feel the intense fulfillment that we would share. She quickly added that when we do - like we did in October and when we will again at Christmas - that it seems to take on a new dimension and seemed to touch us both more deeply. But she said that in some ways, knowing she doesn't have to feel that with me - seems to give her a sense of relief that she can just enjoy the sex between us. She asked me if I felt like I had to always "compete" with Robert? She commented that, before August, that I seemed to need to almost feel I had to out-do Robert or that I had to make sure she felt sexually fulfilled every time. And she agreed with me that after she'd felt - and I'd recognized - her ability to let herself feel everything with Robert - that it seemed to have changed how I was with her sexually. She smiled at me and said that in some ways I'd already started to act out what we have now come to accept - and she said it - that she could almost feel that I wanted to be the "beta male" for her. So when that time did come - and I was able to say it to her, she was ready to hear it and work with me on it.
She admitted she's heard of alpha/beta before too - it'd been in several Penthouse stories we've read over the year as well as what she'd understood when she'd read that 50-Shades-of-Grey book a few years back - in some of the commentary she'd read, they'd used that terminology.
What she did tell me again was what I was missing - she told me that as we were fucking last night and she lay beneath me. She told me how it felt so good to feel him cum in her last week - and again emphasized that it'll have been like 40+ times that he'll have cum in her since I last did. She giggled and said "that really makes it Robbies pussy, doesn't it?". She could obviously tell that turned me on as she moaned along with me as my cock tightened in her pussy as it swelled up. But when she started to tell me how turned on she gets when she knows she'll feel Robbie cum in her - and how she teased me that "only he gets to do that" - I was so horny I knew I was getting close. I was really pounding into her and she was moaning and had cum several times already when she moaned that "you can have me again in another 4 weeks" that I finally let go and started to cum as I sped up my pace fucking her. She looked up at me and said "you feel so big" and then she teased me that "too bad I can't really feel you". Oh man did that get to me - she kept saying other stuff but I was stuck on that thought in my head. I could feel her getting wetter - I was plunging in and out faster and faster. She orgasmed as I came - but I knew it wasn't the same as she would if I'd not used a condom. As we lay there together catching our breath she looked at me and said "I'm glad you didn't cum in me" and she hugged me deeply. As I pushed off of her and rolled to one side she rolled onto her side next to me and lay against me - we were still coming down from our high and she rubbed up against me as I hugged her.
As we lay there we talked again, calmly this time instead of short utterances. She hugged me and said that she missed feeling it at the end and said "you know it's not the same when I don't feel you cum in me at the end" and she told me how she loves feeling it when the last thrusts are into her wet cum-filled pussy. "I cum so deeply like that" - and she raised up on one elbow and kissed me and said she loved me and that she loved "that you want me to feel that with another guy". I hugged her back and said that it felt weird to say it - but that I had to agree with her, that it's brought something very new to our relationship. She giggled and said "tell me that you aren't totally looking forward to Christmas?" adding "you know, when we can share that again". We kissed again and she asked me if this was what I wanted - I didn't hesitate to say yes to her. She pulled back from me and said as if she were telling me the weather - that this meant she was going to find another lover and she joked and said "hopefully Tony will be next".....
We lay there a little longer and this time, very lovingly, asked me to again tell her how I feel about all of this. I hugged her and said that it turned me on to deny myself and us for a while longer. I looked at her and I said that I knew that pushing her to want it with another guy was part of what I wanted to feel - that she was able to have her sexual pleasure from another guy. I told her that it turned me - yes - to know what I was giving up. I told her that I knew how she felt when she'd cum at the very end of when we'd have sex together - and that now, yes, I knew she was going to seek that from another guy. What I told her was that it turned me on to feel and know she was looking for that - that she wanted that moment with another guy. She asked me if that was a part of it - that knowing by denying me/her/us of that moment, that she would want and would look for it elsewhere. I told her that was the part that turned me on the most - knowing she wanted it - and I reminded her that was how I felt so strongly about when we'd first started dating - that when we fucked, it was her that wanted it for herself - and how I knew that if she did it with me like that, that she did it with other guys like that too.
She giggled and said that she'd never really thought about it all together like that and then said that I was crazy - but in the same breath she also looked at me and said that she never thought she could feel as close to another person as she does with me to even be able to talk about all of this much less do it.
First - I saw all of the consternation about Sue continuing things with Robert. As I mentioned, we had some fun in bed last night and as part of all of that, I asked her what she thought was going to happen. She replied "well, I know what I'd like to have happen" - and she said what I'd shared here, that the 2 of them would somehow find time to get together again. But she then added "I know that's not likely" and she said that she hoped they'd find time for maybe one last time somehow between now and Christmas - but she said she knows that after the holidays, if things are going good for him, then she accepts that it'll probably end - at least for a while. I casually asked her where she envisioned their reunion happening and she said she wasn't sure - at first she said "at his place" and I brought up "are you sure that's a good idea?" - and after we talked for a bit longer she giggled and said "well, maybe you'll finally get to meet him". I didn't understand until she continued and giggled more and said "maybe we'll just come here". It was more a joke from her than anything - but I also felt a bit of seriousness to it, as if to say "if that's the only way we can get together" - but I let it alone since it was pretty much as I'd felt it was - that it was more of a desire from her than a reality.
But it did serve to launch us into our fun last night. She said to me that she'll be in full-family/thanksgiving mode starting today. So when we had the house to ourselves (our son delayed coming home till today because of the weather last night) we took advantage.
She reminded me again that Robert's the first guy she's ever been able to cum with like she does with me. She asked me sort of if that made me happy or how I felt about it. I told her I knew this day was coming and that I'd long wanted her to be able to really let go and be with her lover. It went right along with her comments about how she was enjoying the sex with him a LOT now. We talked about how she felt it was unfair that just as she was able to reach this kind of sexual connection with him, that it has to come to an end. I asked her if perhaps that she knew it was going to end, whether that may have also been what let her feel this way with him. Before she could answer, I told her that I'd seen it developing and I admitted that it was partly what led to my decisions about myself too.
She was very intrigued by that and asked me in this very sexy voice to explain what I meant. This time I used the alpha and beta terms again or a bit more with her. I told her that it really turned me on when I started to see her respond with Robert with him as her alpha-male sexual partner. I told her that her confidence and openness with him had really surprised me - but that it had also made me feel so much closer to her. She hugged me and said that in a crazy way, she felt the same way, that her ability to feel things with Robert hadn't taken away from us - in some ways she says it made her appreciate much more about me - as she said it - that I'm not the only one to give her those types of orgasms and sexual feelings - that in some ways it's made her take much more notice of me elsewhere and see me as more than, and something other than her primary sexual partner. We both almost said the same things at the same time - that somehow, when she allowed herself to fulfill herself with Robert, that it seemed to have changed how we both feel about each other.
She, like me, says that she feels less sexual anxiety with me knowing that she doesn't always need to feel the intense fulfillment that we would share. She quickly added that when we do - like we did in October and when we will again at Christmas - that it seems to take on a new dimension and seemed to touch us both more deeply. But she said that in some ways, knowing she doesn't have to feel that with me - seems to give her a sense of relief that she can just enjoy the sex between us. She asked me if I felt like I had to always "compete" with Robert? She commented that, before August, that I seemed to need to almost feel I had to out-do Robert or that I had to make sure she felt sexually fulfilled every time. And she agreed with me that after she'd felt - and I'd recognized - her ability to let herself feel everything with Robert - that it seemed to have changed how I was with her sexually. She smiled at me and said that in some ways I'd already started to act out what we have now come to accept - and she said it - that she could almost feel that I wanted to be the "beta male" for her. So when that time did come - and I was able to say it to her, she was ready to hear it and work with me on it.
She admitted she's heard of alpha/beta before too - it'd been in several Penthouse stories we've read over the year as well as what she'd understood when she'd read that 50-Shades-of-Grey book a few years back - in some of the commentary she'd read, they'd used that terminology.
What she did tell me again was what I was missing - she told me that as we were fucking last night and she lay beneath me. She told me how it felt so good to feel him cum in her last week - and again emphasized that it'll have been like 40+ times that he'll have cum in her since I last did. She giggled and said "that really makes it Robbies pussy, doesn't it?". She could obviously tell that turned me on as she moaned along with me as my cock tightened in her pussy as it swelled up. But when she started to tell me how turned on she gets when she knows she'll feel Robbie cum in her - and how she teased me that "only he gets to do that" - I was so horny I knew I was getting close. I was really pounding into her and she was moaning and had cum several times already when she moaned that "you can have me again in another 4 weeks" that I finally let go and started to cum as I sped up my pace fucking her. She looked up at me and said "you feel so big" and then she teased me that "too bad I can't really feel you". Oh man did that get to me - she kept saying other stuff but I was stuck on that thought in my head. I could feel her getting wetter - I was plunging in and out faster and faster. She orgasmed as I came - but I knew it wasn't the same as she would if I'd not used a condom. As we lay there together catching our breath she looked at me and said "I'm glad you didn't cum in me" and she hugged me deeply. As I pushed off of her and rolled to one side she rolled onto her side next to me and lay against me - we were still coming down from our high and she rubbed up against me as I hugged her.
As we lay there we talked again, calmly this time instead of short utterances. She hugged me and said that she missed feeling it at the end and said "you know it's not the same when I don't feel you cum in me at the end" and she told me how she loves feeling it when the last thrusts are into her wet cum-filled pussy. "I cum so deeply like that" - and she raised up on one elbow and kissed me and said she loved me and that she loved "that you want me to feel that with another guy". I hugged her back and said that it felt weird to say it - but that I had to agree with her, that it's brought something very new to our relationship. She giggled and said "tell me that you aren't totally looking forward to Christmas?" adding "you know, when we can share that again". We kissed again and she asked me if this was what I wanted - I didn't hesitate to say yes to her. She pulled back from me and said as if she were telling me the weather - that this meant she was going to find another lover and she joked and said "hopefully Tony will be next".....
We lay there a little longer and this time, very lovingly, asked me to again tell her how I feel about all of this. I hugged her and said that it turned me on to deny myself and us for a while longer. I looked at her and I said that I knew that pushing her to want it with another guy was part of what I wanted to feel - that she was able to have her sexual pleasure from another guy. I told her that it turned me - yes - to know what I was giving up. I told her that I knew how she felt when she'd cum at the very end of when we'd have sex together - and that now, yes, I knew she was going to seek that from another guy. What I told her was that it turned me on to feel and know she was looking for that - that she wanted that moment with another guy. She asked me if that was a part of it - that knowing by denying me/her/us of that moment, that she would want and would look for it elsewhere. I told her that was the part that turned me on the most - knowing she wanted it - and I reminded her that was how I felt so strongly about when we'd first started dating - that when we fucked, it was her that wanted it for herself - and how I knew that if she did it with me like that, that she did it with other guys like that too.
She giggled and said that she'd never really thought about it all together like that and then said that I was crazy - but in the same breath she also looked at me and said that she never thought she could feel as close to another person as she does with me to even be able to talk about all of this much less do it.
stb,
it feels to me that you are not using the terms alpha and beta correctly. to me an alpha male is an acquired/gained status, and the alpha male is respected by other males around, who accept his superiority.
in your case, robert has not really gained that status, his higher access to sue was given to him by sue, also you never met him, and if you do, i don't see you letting him be the one in charge. among all of sue's prior lovers, i see don as the only alpha male, and i remember you were not really excited about it.
hopefully i was able to communicate my thoughts clearly.
happy thanksgiving everyone, and sorry for all lower case post, a tech glitch with my keyboard.
it feels to me that you are not using the terms alpha and beta correctly. to me an alpha male is an acquired/gained status, and the alpha male is respected by other males around, who accept his superiority.
in your case, robert has not really gained that status, his higher access to sue was given to him by sue, also you never met him, and if you do, i don't see you letting him be the one in charge. among all of sue's prior lovers, i see don as the only alpha male, and i remember you were not really excited about it.
hopefully i was able to communicate my thoughts clearly.
happy thanksgiving everyone, and sorry for all lower case post, a tech glitch with my keyboard.
Happy Thanksgiving all. Sue's off to her parents house already and we'll follow behind in a while.
TMW - I understand what you're saying, but my reference to alpha/beta, like most else in what we've done together - has been intended to perhaps "define" roles between the 2 of us and not in reference to others. I agree with you that another guy being an alpha for her did a lot for her in that looking back, I think Don was responsible for a lot of the changes in Sue over time - her accepting that she wanted the sex for herself and, for what Don did, made her wanting it not necessarily always for me.
I know it is a weird thing to want to do - I still can't get my arms around it totally. I said that in some ways, I better understand what I'd considered the more extreme stories of cuckolding where the husband really does submit to the wife - or the wife really does emphasize her lover in preference to him. I still don't fully understand it - but every time Sue and I have sex together, it seems to reinforce what we're doing. I know what I'm denying both myself and her will encourage her to want it with another guy. It so turns me on to know that and for her to know that too. So to me, in terms of our relationship - that I am willingly and wantingly ceding that to another man - to have her want it from him and my own weird desire to give that to him - that is where I define myself as the beta. Yes, it's a narrow definition.
Anyway - need to get things packed into the car before I leave with the kids to meet her - we're bringing the important stuff - the beer and wine!
Gobble gobble everyone.
TMW - I understand what you're saying, but my reference to alpha/beta, like most else in what we've done together - has been intended to perhaps "define" roles between the 2 of us and not in reference to others. I agree with you that another guy being an alpha for her did a lot for her in that looking back, I think Don was responsible for a lot of the changes in Sue over time - her accepting that she wanted the sex for herself and, for what Don did, made her wanting it not necessarily always for me.
I know it is a weird thing to want to do - I still can't get my arms around it totally. I said that in some ways, I better understand what I'd considered the more extreme stories of cuckolding where the husband really does submit to the wife - or the wife really does emphasize her lover in preference to him. I still don't fully understand it - but every time Sue and I have sex together, it seems to reinforce what we're doing. I know what I'm denying both myself and her will encourage her to want it with another guy. It so turns me on to know that and for her to know that too. So to me, in terms of our relationship - that I am willingly and wantingly ceding that to another man - to have her want it from him and my own weird desire to give that to him - that is where I define myself as the beta. Yes, it's a narrow definition.
Anyway - need to get things packed into the car before I leave with the kids to meet her - we're bringing the important stuff - the beer and wine!
Gobble gobble everyone.
Peak/Dana and everyone else, yeah - it was a nice thanksgiving. Nice that Sue's dad was able to be there even if he didn't eat much. He's stable but he seems so frail. Still, if he can make it through the winter, that'll be a real accomplishment. I know that everyone was happy as we'd thought he wouldn't be there for the holidays this year.
Our son is home through tomorrow evening so there hasn't been a whole lot of sex to talk about - we've played a little in bed at night and she's encouraged me to masturbate - last night she got her favorite dildo out and joined me. We lay sort of head to toe and I loved watching her plunge the dildo deep into her pussy and see it come out glistening wet after she'd cum. I knew she was holding off for the big one to be when I would finally cum and as expected - as soon as I started spurting away, wow, did she cum like a fountain - with enough wetness to leave a wetspot beneath her as she lay there afterwards with the dildo slowly slipping out of her as she relaxed.
What I can say is that we've started to have some more frank talks (not Frank as in her former lover) - and she's become quite candid about what she wants. One thing she did say was that she wants someone else - she mentioned Tony but at other times just said "another guy" - but she has been quite clear that before I get to have her bare over Christmas, that she wants to be with someone else first and she teased that "Tony's going to have me bare before you do" - which fueled some intense jerking off on my part. But she also said that the longer we go without me cumming in her, she said that it is making her want to be with another guy more and more. And at another point she said that she is "really enjoying" what we're doing and that she's even agreeing that this should perhaps become more of our norm and that she wanted us to have special-occasions - either holidays or vacations when we get away as when I will get to have her without condoms. She said that she is liking us "re-defining" our roles like this and that she can better understand how this can turn me on - she says it even turns her on to know that when we do make-love, that we are holding something back to intensify things between us.
Anyway - I need to run right now but may have more time later.
Hope everyone here had a Happy Thanksgiving.
Our son is home through tomorrow evening so there hasn't been a whole lot of sex to talk about - we've played a little in bed at night and she's encouraged me to masturbate - last night she got her favorite dildo out and joined me. We lay sort of head to toe and I loved watching her plunge the dildo deep into her pussy and see it come out glistening wet after she'd cum. I knew she was holding off for the big one to be when I would finally cum and as expected - as soon as I started spurting away, wow, did she cum like a fountain - with enough wetness to leave a wetspot beneath her as she lay there afterwards with the dildo slowly slipping out of her as she relaxed.
What I can say is that we've started to have some more frank talks (not Frank as in her former lover) - and she's become quite candid about what she wants. One thing she did say was that she wants someone else - she mentioned Tony but at other times just said "another guy" - but she has been quite clear that before I get to have her bare over Christmas, that she wants to be with someone else first and she teased that "Tony's going to have me bare before you do" - which fueled some intense jerking off on my part. But she also said that the longer we go without me cumming in her, she said that it is making her want to be with another guy more and more. And at another point she said that she is "really enjoying" what we're doing and that she's even agreeing that this should perhaps become more of our norm and that she wanted us to have special-occasions - either holidays or vacations when we get away as when I will get to have her without condoms. She said that she is liking us "re-defining" our roles like this and that she can better understand how this can turn me on - she says it even turns her on to know that when we do make-love, that we are holding something back to intensify things between us.
Anyway - I need to run right now but may have more time later.
Hope everyone here had a Happy Thanksgiving.
