so based on what she was hinting at, do you see her wanting more of just him without penetration by you? It seems that is where she is going with the line of questions. Have you asked her what she is thinking about after July? I am going to throw out there that she will ask you for the rest of the summer.
Trial Denial
- Thread starterSoonToBe
- Start date
Far2 - it could be. In her infatuation with Robert it seems to me that she's most focused on having just him cumming in her. I know it's something in her head about this (but I'm also aware that there may be a hormonal influence going on over time too that could be deepening her attraction with him). I don't know that she necessarily doesn't want me fucking her - as evidenced over Memorial Day weekend where she wanted me almost as much as possible.
I think - if i were to venture a guess - it'd be that she'll want July 4th week for us as we'll be on vacation and probably going away for a few days. And I'm going to also say that after that - yes - I'm fairly sure she's going to want another denial-period. But based on what I've seen, feel and hear from her, that she will "want me" again sometime in August which will line up with our intended vacation schedules.
If it were an ideal-fantasy world for her, that yes, perhaps she'd want to forego sex with me for an extended period of time. And if next weekend and then our July 4th week works out - that I would say that perhaps she would want to try for the rest of the summer. But at the same time, I know how concerned and then how relieved she was after we were able to reconnect so deeply over Memorial Day. Perhaps if she feels the same this coming weekend and into July 4th - that our "reconnecting" was as good as she needed it to be - that maybe she would ask for the rest of the summer.
I do love that she has this need to reconnect with me. At first I thought I was the only one needing that. I guess it's as I've said - she still needs reassurance both from me verbally in supporting her desires - but also from me physically.
I've also been pushing her to let me take some more sexy pictures of her. I told her she looks all aglow at times that I would love to have a picture of her. She giggled and said that Robert has asked her if he could have one. I thought of saying "why don't we ask Frank for them?" but I know that may be a touchy subject for her - and I'm not totally sure what he did and didn't take of her. She did smile back at me and said "maybe" and then she added "it's not like you can't see me whenever you want".....
I think - if i were to venture a guess - it'd be that she'll want July 4th week for us as we'll be on vacation and probably going away for a few days. And I'm going to also say that after that - yes - I'm fairly sure she's going to want another denial-period. But based on what I've seen, feel and hear from her, that she will "want me" again sometime in August which will line up with our intended vacation schedules.
If it were an ideal-fantasy world for her, that yes, perhaps she'd want to forego sex with me for an extended period of time. And if next weekend and then our July 4th week works out - that I would say that perhaps she would want to try for the rest of the summer. But at the same time, I know how concerned and then how relieved she was after we were able to reconnect so deeply over Memorial Day. Perhaps if she feels the same this coming weekend and into July 4th - that our "reconnecting" was as good as she needed it to be - that maybe she would ask for the rest of the summer.
I do love that she has this need to reconnect with me. At first I thought I was the only one needing that. I guess it's as I've said - she still needs reassurance both from me verbally in supporting her desires - but also from me physically.
I've also been pushing her to let me take some more sexy pictures of her. I told her she looks all aglow at times that I would love to have a picture of her. She giggled and said that Robert has asked her if he could have one. I thought of saying "why don't we ask Frank for them?" but I know that may be a touchy subject for her - and I'm not totally sure what he did and didn't take of her. She did smile back at me and said "maybe" and then she added "it's not like you can't see me whenever you want".....
STB
i know that everyone has had something to say about you and sue and robert. and that is me as well. and it look's like you to have got it all worked out but there is alway's a chance that thing's can go wrong you know it as murphy's law.it does happen all the time.
so i was reading a story and it made me think of you and sue so i will list the web site and. hope that you take the time to read it. and see what you think about it to.
it is at ourhotwife. org and it is in the library page and who wrote it was xleglover. check it out and tell me what you think there are 10 chapter's to it.
keep us posted.
ps yes stb all of us here know that sue still need's you to tell her and show her it is still ok for her to keep going with him.
i know that everyone has had something to say about you and sue and robert. and that is me as well. and it look's like you to have got it all worked out but there is alway's a chance that thing's can go wrong you know it as murphy's law.it does happen all the time.
so i was reading a story and it made me think of you and sue so i will list the web site and. hope that you take the time to read it. and see what you think about it to.
it is at ourhotwife. org and it is in the library page and who wrote it was xleglover. check it out and tell me what you think there are 10 chapter's to it.
keep us posted.
ps yes stb all of us here know that sue still need's you to tell her and show her it is still ok for her to keep going with him.
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First - I re-read what I wrote and I have to also add that at times I find it hard to believe that this is what I'm now fantasizing about and wanting to experience. As I said, maybe it's what I've wanted to feel all along and that it took Sue to come to terms with it as well as to want it for herself. Maybe it's because I don't feel threatened by Robert - at least not just yet. I do have some reluctance and hesitation on all of this, however, I also know that in my head I am also thinking that with everything seeming to line up as it has (no small thanks to Sue) - that whether I am ready for this or not, that the circumstances and desires on all 3 parts are there to say to me that, again, whether it's really what I wanted for this summer or not - that at this point that we should just let it go it's course naturally.
It does pain met to think of possibly going for 3 or more weeks without, as Far2 put it, without penetrating her. And to know that it's something I'm agreeing to voluntarily, it's even more intense to think about. But on the other hand, as I said, serendipitously the circumstances and opportunities are lining up such that if I/we put the brakes on it, that I'm unsure when or if another opportunity like this may arise.
I know others have said that guys can pick up on when a woman (wife) is "available" so maybe if I/we did calm all of this down, that it might happen again of it's own chance of fate. And I do know that she does still want to have the proverbial "full blown affair" - but my thinking on this is that it will- now - probably wait until after next summer when both of our kids will be out of the house (providing our son doesn't move back home after college). The thought of her being heavily involved with lovers both this summer and after next is definitely something I've thought about.
Dana - yes, I've read Xleglover's stories including the latest installment. I don't read them on the other forum site - instead I follow them on Literotica.com - there are many others stories from him there. And yes, I recognize many parallels between Sue and I and Xleg's latest chapters - but there are also many key differences, most importantly is the tenure of our relationship vs. the one in his story where things were already questionably embraced so soon into their marriage. Yes, I did read them and in many ways, I can identify with some of the husband's proclivities - his enjoyment at his wife enjoying sex with her lover.
It does pain met to think of possibly going for 3 or more weeks without, as Far2 put it, without penetrating her. And to know that it's something I'm agreeing to voluntarily, it's even more intense to think about. But on the other hand, as I said, serendipitously the circumstances and opportunities are lining up such that if I/we put the brakes on it, that I'm unsure when or if another opportunity like this may arise.
I know others have said that guys can pick up on when a woman (wife) is "available" so maybe if I/we did calm all of this down, that it might happen again of it's own chance of fate. And I do know that she does still want to have the proverbial "full blown affair" - but my thinking on this is that it will- now - probably wait until after next summer when both of our kids will be out of the house (providing our son doesn't move back home after college). The thought of her being heavily involved with lovers both this summer and after next is definitely something I've thought about.
Dana - yes, I've read Xleglover's stories including the latest installment. I don't read them on the other forum site - instead I follow them on Literotica.com - there are many others stories from him there. And yes, I recognize many parallels between Sue and I and Xleg's latest chapters - but there are also many key differences, most importantly is the tenure of our relationship vs. the one in his story where things were already questionably embraced so soon into their marriage. Yes, I did read them and in many ways, I can identify with some of the husband's proclivities - his enjoyment at his wife enjoying sex with her lover.
So - it's after 5pm and I'm wrapping up from work and thinking - she's due home in maybe another 45 minutes - and I'm thinking maybe tonight I'll do as she says and leave her be and not pester or bother her to share her evening. Yes it'll drive me crazy to think of her creamy wet pussy lying beneath her pants and panties - but maybe I'll leave it up to her and see what her lead is on this? See what she wants. I know at times she thoroughly enjoys my tender ministration to her used pussy - but at other times I definitely know she is "doing it for me" letting me go down on her or share in the moment. I KNOW that if I leave her be today - that come Wednesday night that the temptation will be even stronger - so maybe that's a good thing?
Steve,
I think maybe what you are witnessing with Sue is part of the fundamental difference between men and women. Sue is seeing her day with Robert lasting longer than her time with him. She is cherishing the wetness left inside her, stopping you accessing it. Even when she is home, that day is still his, not yours. As excited as you are by her return, her excitement seems to be still with him. If she closes her eyes, she may be thinking of him inside her still. She may be trying to tell you that she would prefer those moments to savour him without having to cope with your attentions. There will certainly be a conflict there, she is genuinely appreciative of the freedom you have given her, and doesn't want to upset you for reasons both selfish (she risks losing Robert) and for her love for you. Yet another internal conflict for her. Yet, to really leave her, or to leave the decision to approach to her, is a very hard one for you I'm sure. It risks, even subtly, Sue thinking that you no longer care. I don't envy you having to walk this fine line, but bear in mind it is a direct consequence of you getting exactly what you asked for!
One final thought. It's strange in a way that as you have been having less sex with your wife, you have written more and what you have written has been even more compelling. Yet another reminder that our greatest erogenous zone is between our ears.
I think maybe what you are witnessing with Sue is part of the fundamental difference between men and women. Sue is seeing her day with Robert lasting longer than her time with him. She is cherishing the wetness left inside her, stopping you accessing it. Even when she is home, that day is still his, not yours. As excited as you are by her return, her excitement seems to be still with him. If she closes her eyes, she may be thinking of him inside her still. She may be trying to tell you that she would prefer those moments to savour him without having to cope with your attentions. There will certainly be a conflict there, she is genuinely appreciative of the freedom you have given her, and doesn't want to upset you for reasons both selfish (she risks losing Robert) and for her love for you. Yet another internal conflict for her. Yet, to really leave her, or to leave the decision to approach to her, is a very hard one for you I'm sure. It risks, even subtly, Sue thinking that you no longer care. I don't envy you having to walk this fine line, but bear in mind it is a direct consequence of you getting exactly what you asked for!
One final thought. It's strange in a way that as you have been having less sex with your wife, you have written more and what you have written has been even more compelling. Yet another reminder that our greatest erogenous zone is between our ears.
Man tend to be more rational types while ladies tend to be more emotional ones generally speaking...,
What is the end game?
Will Sue see you as the same man going forward or will she loose respect little by little driven by urges then regret then anger, resentment perhaps followed by blaming her husband perhaps if this continues with little balance anyway between you two if you are ****** to attempt to cool it down or request a timeout?
Enjoy but I would say remember, always remember some balance in any relationship. Instead of as a moth to the flames.....,
What is the end game?
Will Sue see you as the same man going forward or will she loose respect little by little driven by urges then regret then anger, resentment perhaps followed by blaming her husband perhaps if this continues with little balance anyway between you two if you are ****** to attempt to cool it down or request a timeout?
Enjoy but I would say remember, always remember some balance in any relationship. Instead of as a moth to the flames.....,
Oh boy, have I ever said thank you for letting us live the cucky dream vicariously? Your mention
of the nude beach trip gave me some ideas: Wouldn't it be fun for Sue to invite Robbie to visit
the nude beach, have him bring a tent and put it up near you and Sue. Then she could "go to
the bathroom/run an errand/some other excuse to get away for a bit" for a bit, while in fact going
to Robbie's tent to "cheat" on you. You could go near the tent to listen...
Or it could be your tent, then you have to go run an errand while Robbie visits her, and upon
your return Sue treats you to sloppy seconds (perhaps your reward for postponing your reclaiming
of her this weekend?) You can only imagine what others would think if they happen to see her
be with 2 different men that day.
Fun ideas to think about
-Hiki
of the nude beach trip gave me some ideas: Wouldn't it be fun for Sue to invite Robbie to visit
the nude beach, have him bring a tent and put it up near you and Sue. Then she could "go to
the bathroom/run an errand/some other excuse to get away for a bit" for a bit, while in fact going
to Robbie's tent to "cheat" on you. You could go near the tent to listen...
Or it could be your tent, then you have to go run an errand while Robbie visits her, and upon
your return Sue treats you to sloppy seconds (perhaps your reward for postponing your reclaiming
of her this weekend?) You can only imagine what others would think if they happen to see her
be with 2 different men that day.
Fun ideas to think about
-Hiki
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Steve,
I think things are about to get real for you. Sue was wanting to experience a true full blown affair. I think she is experiencing just that. True affairs are draining, both emotionally and physically, for the ones involved. Therefore, it is understandable that Sue may come home to you, after being with Robert, tired and just wanting to relax. Robert is probably taking a lot out of her and she simply may not always have the mental energy left to entertain you. The majority of husbands are not aware when their wives are involved in an affair of the caliber Sue is. The wife will usually expend most of her mental and physical energy with the lover and go on auto pilot at home. Just reassure her you are glad she is home and keep doing the things that make Sue know she has all your attention.
I think things are about to become difficult at times for you. You need to avoid seeming to "needy" for her attentions when you are in your periods of denial. To appear needy might run the risk of ruining things a bit for Sue and having her resent you. From what Sue is saying, things are going good right now but she is also telling you how they could be made great by you.
I think things are about to get real for you. Sue was wanting to experience a true full blown affair. I think she is experiencing just that. True affairs are draining, both emotionally and physically, for the ones involved. Therefore, it is understandable that Sue may come home to you, after being with Robert, tired and just wanting to relax. Robert is probably taking a lot out of her and she simply may not always have the mental energy left to entertain you. The majority of husbands are not aware when their wives are involved in an affair of the caliber Sue is. The wife will usually expend most of her mental and physical energy with the lover and go on auto pilot at home. Just reassure her you are glad she is home and keep doing the things that make Sue know she has all your attention.
I think things are about to become difficult at times for you. You need to avoid seeming to "needy" for her attentions when you are in your periods of denial. To appear needy might run the risk of ruining things a bit for Sue and having her resent you. From what Sue is saying, things are going good right now but she is also telling you how they could be made great by you.
Jax is Spot On. Steve As I have told You many times before. You are a Cuckold and a Sub. Many months ago you gave Sur control over Yours and Her Sex Life totally. Other may have forgotten. I didn't. Did You??? She doesn't have to tell You anything if She chooses. And You gave her that Right. You are but a Watcher in all this. Sue can open the curtain. She can close the curtain. Her what ever She wants. Push Her. You may find Yourself shut out totally.
Very interesting/entertaining course of events unfolding both right now and certainly much more to come as the summer continues on. Just two quick questions from the last two days. In post # 140 you ask Sue "I asked her yesterday wheather Robert doesn't want more or something else from her?"-- then you went on to talk about other stuff--without really answering what she said in response to your question. So-- what ,if any, demands/requests/desires does Robert currently have as far as Sue is concerned?
Second in post # 144 you say " the thought of her being heavily involved with Lovers both this summer and after next is definitely something that I've thought about". So-- what are your thoughts about her future involvement with Lovers, especially (and I know that Robert, due to his ultimate life-plan, isn't going to be long term. IMO this (relationship with Sue) should begin to fizzle out with his next set of New-Years resolutions) post Robert if she is able to connect with a Lover who is more age appropriate, does not have younger children or anything else to tie him down (basicly single and available) and who demonstrates both need and desire for Sue. Just off the top of my head any chance way down the road that this could develop into more of a Poly-type of relationship for Sue with two husbands???
Second in post # 144 you say " the thought of her being heavily involved with Lovers both this summer and after next is definitely something that I've thought about". So-- what are your thoughts about her future involvement with Lovers, especially (and I know that Robert, due to his ultimate life-plan, isn't going to be long term. IMO this (relationship with Sue) should begin to fizzle out with his next set of New-Years resolutions) post Robert if she is able to connect with a Lover who is more age appropriate, does not have younger children or anything else to tie him down (basicly single and available) and who demonstrates both need and desire for Sue. Just off the top of my head any chance way down the road that this could develop into more of a Poly-type of relationship for Sue with two husbands???
STB
hope all is going well with you and sue and robert. is sue going to see him tonight.
and it is wednesday again and are you looking forward to tonight as you and sue do your normal now.
and are you and sue talked about you going to the 4th of july now and not reclaim her this weekend.
hope you have fun tonight. and keep us posted.
hope all is going well with you and sue and robert. is sue going to see him tonight.
and it is wednesday again and are you looking forward to tonight as you and sue do your normal now.
and are you and sue talked about you going to the 4th of july now and not reclaim her this weekend.
hope you have fun tonight. and keep us posted.
Thought I'd take a few minutes before turning in to update and as I see, answer....
First - regarding last night. She did come home shortly before 7pm - and no - I didn't push her to share any details or more with me. I think she liked that I'd heard what she'd said and later in the evening she said "thank you" and she said that she appreciated what I was doing for her and she said something like "separating things" which I didn't ask her to explain further but took it to mean what others have said here, that she would like to exclude me when she's been with Robert.
I guess everyone, including me, expected this. As Will and others have said - it is what I wanted. And as Jax said - it is becoming very real what I've put into motion.
We didn't talk about anything else last night other than that she wanted to think about things and that we'd talk on Tuesday - which was tonight.
With me having all day to think about things - including lying there next to her as she fell asleep - I had time to think about things. I had only seen Peak's post and it alone last night gave me a lot to think about. The way it was written did hit home, especially with what we did and didn't do. And it did make me think about a lot of things.
For Manon - that is something she's aware of as well as I, that we need to maintain some sort of balance - earlier tonight we basically described this balance as between the odd-pleasure I am getting from what she's doing - versus - the fun and pleasure she is having with him. And while that sounds more one sided, as it did to me, she quickly added that knowing I am enjoying this "in your own odd way" is part of the fun and pleasure. I didn't ask more or push further but the sentiment was clear - that she still is driven in this by knowing I am enjoying and that I'm still not sure how she'd be if I were to not enjoy it. I think perhaps she would pull back from this somewhat more extreme situation that we are exploring. But that is a conversation for another day, the psychological side of it.
So - back to Peak for a moment as I figure out how to say all of this in a way that compresses what spanned a few hours here and there into a much shorter version. I know she is extending her time with Robert - she's admitted that. And she went further and said that she preferred it if we didn't do anything - or rather - I didn't do anything tonight with her too - and she admitted that at times today when she still feels from him - be it wet or, as she put it "still well fucked" (a glass of wine helped ease her tongue) - that she loves it. She asked me pretty openly how I was about this. I asked her if it was going to be something that became more infrequent for us. And I think she knew that I wanted her to answer honestly and not say something that would make me feel good - she paused for a second and then said, pretty much said yes, if I was okay with it, that maybe after this weekend, that she'd like to try it.
I think I must have let out a moan or a dejected sound because she immediately said that "only if it's working for us" and she added that she wanted me to tell her if it wasn't. I didn't really know what to say so I said "okay" and she said that's what she wants us to be able to do on Wednesdays - to let us talk - and if it's good for me, then she thought it was kind of a time for us to be close and for her to share in my pleasure. She asked me how the blow-job was last weekend and I told her it was incredible. She giggled and said "that's always an option too" and then she said "you know, you can ask me for that if you want to" and she said that since she's with Robert, that she doesn't mind doing it for me every now and then if I wanted. That was interesting to hear! But it also fits in with Peak's thoughts.
Answering the other posts before I finish up with how tonight's talk went....
Manon - I don't think Sue will lose respect for me. I truly feel like this is something we're doing together, from our talk tonight she says that in many ways, her pleasure depends on mine.
Hiki - your thoughts are fun but the reality is that as she's said, he is respectful of Sue and my marriage and despite my "knowing" about her having a lover, he apparently doesn't see it as a place for him to intrude into. I re-asked my question to her about whether Robert ever wants anything more from her. I asked it in the context of "doesn't he ever want to do anything with you other than have sex? doesn't he ever want to go out or anything?". She smiled and said that he has asked whether she could stay for dinner instead of running home sometimes - and that meant either going out or staying in. I asked her if she wanted to "date" him instead of just being an FWB - and vice-versa. She giggled and said that "he's a pretty horny guy" and then she added that they have gone out on Fridays after they've split up after work. But in general, she said again how he's reluctant to ask her for more time because again of how he feels about her and I. So, putting it bluntly, I suppose getting laid 3x a week and going out along with one of those times isn't so bad a deal. lol
Jax - your post is probably the most level-headed and combined with some of what Peak said, probably summarizes the situation. I think her eager offering of blow-jobs for me and the promise of perhaps some increased intimacy between us on Wednesdays may help alleviate my neediness...
It is a little hard for me to accept the reality of your last sentence though. Even though I see it to be true. But that's the thing that keeps me going - it's that if it will be better for her - then I want to do it. As crazy as it sounds - sitting her typing this while I know she's sleeping away looking forward to seeing him tomorrow - it's crazy but it just turns me on like nothing else - and even more so, it makes me feel like I want and respect her even more and more.
Will - I am still trying to let her lead this and to not push her or feel needy. It is incredibly exciting to see her behaving like this though. Its like she's a teenager almost all over again and is in this place where she seems to exude sexuality everywhere. At least in my head she does - I can see her hand or arm or leg and just thinking about her soft-skin touching mine is enough to get me hard lately.
CSC - you asked what I'd updated about earlier as I'd never asked more. I asked that question open-endedly to see what her reply may have been - if Robert had asked for anything. She said he was respective of our relationship and - at least to her - is why he doesn't want or push her to do more or spend more time with him. I asked her "he doesn't want anything?" and again she said that she thinks he's just getting to the point where he may be more comfortable with that sort of thing. She says he tries to be careful about leaving marks or hickies on her too. So, it's kind of different, that he's a polite lover!
When I asked her if there was anything more - she joked with me for a second and said that what he wanted most she couldn't give him - that's a child of his own. She's mentioned that he still considers that a "must" for him. But when I ask he what he's thinking of how he'll meet someone, etc., if he's with her - she just shrugged her shoulders and simply said that it wont be with her (the baby) and that she's ready for grandkids if anything. And when she talks about this stuff with me about him, even if she's joking as she was, there's still a somber element to it.
For the future - I've said it already that I think the cat is now well out of the bag now. I've already admitted that I don't think I could exercise any sort of veto power for the longer term - so I suspect that she may always have a lover going out into the future. If I had to guess, I'm going to say again that I think a year or so from now when our daughter is heading off to college, that I think this is all going to slow down substantially. I think right now - things are happening that are going to define how the future works for us.
And so - to close this out - I've essentially agreed to leave her alone after she's been with Robert in exchange for more open talk about what's going on, increased talk between us on Wednesdays including more openness on her part and a random blow-job here and there. That's not to say I'll never get to at least play with her - but she says she'd like to guide that to start with but that she'll still let me "have some fun" with her at least once a week too.
Hopefully this all made sense.
First - regarding last night. She did come home shortly before 7pm - and no - I didn't push her to share any details or more with me. I think she liked that I'd heard what she'd said and later in the evening she said "thank you" and she said that she appreciated what I was doing for her and she said something like "separating things" which I didn't ask her to explain further but took it to mean what others have said here, that she would like to exclude me when she's been with Robert.
I guess everyone, including me, expected this. As Will and others have said - it is what I wanted. And as Jax said - it is becoming very real what I've put into motion.
We didn't talk about anything else last night other than that she wanted to think about things and that we'd talk on Tuesday - which was tonight.
With me having all day to think about things - including lying there next to her as she fell asleep - I had time to think about things. I had only seen Peak's post and it alone last night gave me a lot to think about. The way it was written did hit home, especially with what we did and didn't do. And it did make me think about a lot of things.
For Manon - that is something she's aware of as well as I, that we need to maintain some sort of balance - earlier tonight we basically described this balance as between the odd-pleasure I am getting from what she's doing - versus - the fun and pleasure she is having with him. And while that sounds more one sided, as it did to me, she quickly added that knowing I am enjoying this "in your own odd way" is part of the fun and pleasure. I didn't ask more or push further but the sentiment was clear - that she still is driven in this by knowing I am enjoying and that I'm still not sure how she'd be if I were to not enjoy it. I think perhaps she would pull back from this somewhat more extreme situation that we are exploring. But that is a conversation for another day, the psychological side of it.
So - back to Peak for a moment as I figure out how to say all of this in a way that compresses what spanned a few hours here and there into a much shorter version. I know she is extending her time with Robert - she's admitted that. And she went further and said that she preferred it if we didn't do anything - or rather - I didn't do anything tonight with her too - and she admitted that at times today when she still feels from him - be it wet or, as she put it "still well fucked" (a glass of wine helped ease her tongue) - that she loves it. She asked me pretty openly how I was about this. I asked her if it was going to be something that became more infrequent for us. And I think she knew that I wanted her to answer honestly and not say something that would make me feel good - she paused for a second and then said, pretty much said yes, if I was okay with it, that maybe after this weekend, that she'd like to try it.
I think I must have let out a moan or a dejected sound because she immediately said that "only if it's working for us" and she added that she wanted me to tell her if it wasn't. I didn't really know what to say so I said "okay" and she said that's what she wants us to be able to do on Wednesdays - to let us talk - and if it's good for me, then she thought it was kind of a time for us to be close and for her to share in my pleasure. She asked me how the blow-job was last weekend and I told her it was incredible. She giggled and said "that's always an option too" and then she said "you know, you can ask me for that if you want to" and she said that since she's with Robert, that she doesn't mind doing it for me every now and then if I wanted. That was interesting to hear! But it also fits in with Peak's thoughts.
Answering the other posts before I finish up with how tonight's talk went....
Manon - I don't think Sue will lose respect for me. I truly feel like this is something we're doing together, from our talk tonight she says that in many ways, her pleasure depends on mine.
Hiki - your thoughts are fun but the reality is that as she's said, he is respectful of Sue and my marriage and despite my "knowing" about her having a lover, he apparently doesn't see it as a place for him to intrude into. I re-asked my question to her about whether Robert ever wants anything more from her. I asked it in the context of "doesn't he ever want to do anything with you other than have sex? doesn't he ever want to go out or anything?". She smiled and said that he has asked whether she could stay for dinner instead of running home sometimes - and that meant either going out or staying in. I asked her if she wanted to "date" him instead of just being an FWB - and vice-versa. She giggled and said that "he's a pretty horny guy" and then she added that they have gone out on Fridays after they've split up after work. But in general, she said again how he's reluctant to ask her for more time because again of how he feels about her and I. So, putting it bluntly, I suppose getting laid 3x a week and going out along with one of those times isn't so bad a deal. lol
Jax - your post is probably the most level-headed and combined with some of what Peak said, probably summarizes the situation. I think her eager offering of blow-jobs for me and the promise of perhaps some increased intimacy between us on Wednesdays may help alleviate my neediness...
It is a little hard for me to accept the reality of your last sentence though. Even though I see it to be true. But that's the thing that keeps me going - it's that if it will be better for her - then I want to do it. As crazy as it sounds - sitting her typing this while I know she's sleeping away looking forward to seeing him tomorrow - it's crazy but it just turns me on like nothing else - and even more so, it makes me feel like I want and respect her even more and more.
Will - I am still trying to let her lead this and to not push her or feel needy. It is incredibly exciting to see her behaving like this though. Its like she's a teenager almost all over again and is in this place where she seems to exude sexuality everywhere. At least in my head she does - I can see her hand or arm or leg and just thinking about her soft-skin touching mine is enough to get me hard lately.
CSC - you asked what I'd updated about earlier as I'd never asked more. I asked that question open-endedly to see what her reply may have been - if Robert had asked for anything. She said he was respective of our relationship and - at least to her - is why he doesn't want or push her to do more or spend more time with him. I asked her "he doesn't want anything?" and again she said that she thinks he's just getting to the point where he may be more comfortable with that sort of thing. She says he tries to be careful about leaving marks or hickies on her too. So, it's kind of different, that he's a polite lover!
When I asked her if there was anything more - she joked with me for a second and said that what he wanted most she couldn't give him - that's a child of his own. She's mentioned that he still considers that a "must" for him. But when I ask he what he's thinking of how he'll meet someone, etc., if he's with her - she just shrugged her shoulders and simply said that it wont be with her (the baby) and that she's ready for grandkids if anything. And when she talks about this stuff with me about him, even if she's joking as she was, there's still a somber element to it.
For the future - I've said it already that I think the cat is now well out of the bag now. I've already admitted that I don't think I could exercise any sort of veto power for the longer term - so I suspect that she may always have a lover going out into the future. If I had to guess, I'm going to say again that I think a year or so from now when our daughter is heading off to college, that I think this is all going to slow down substantially. I think right now - things are happening that are going to define how the future works for us.
And so - to close this out - I've essentially agreed to leave her alone after she's been with Robert in exchange for more open talk about what's going on, increased talk between us on Wednesdays including more openness on her part and a random blow-job here and there. That's not to say I'll never get to at least play with her - but she says she'd like to guide that to start with but that she'll still let me "have some fun" with her at least once a week too.
Hopefully this all made sense.
STB
Great update and sound's like sue is wanting to take it the rest of the way and see if she can. get robert to fall for her and her get past the lust part herself as well and do it after all. and fall for him.
so hope all goes well with this the talk tonight and this weekend and you and sue can work out all the bug's and see if you can go with it. up to the 4th of july next time.
after she see's him today they may talk about something's and see what you tow can agree on.
and as you posted that the one thing that he want's is a child. did sue tell you that he would like it to be sue if she could give him one. and has she said that she would give him one if she could if there. time togather went on past the summer. and they both fall in love with eachother. as i asked would sue want to give him a child if she could if they were in love and i mean true love with eachother.
have fun and enjoy tonight and keep us posted.
Great update and sound's like sue is wanting to take it the rest of the way and see if she can. get robert to fall for her and her get past the lust part herself as well and do it after all. and fall for him.
so hope all goes well with this the talk tonight and this weekend and you and sue can work out all the bug's and see if you can go with it. up to the 4th of july next time.
after she see's him today they may talk about something's and see what you tow can agree on.
and as you posted that the one thing that he want's is a child. did sue tell you that he would like it to be sue if she could give him one. and has she said that she would give him one if she could if there. time togather went on past the summer. and they both fall in love with eachother. as i asked would sue want to give him a child if she could if they were in love and i mean true love with eachother.
have fun and enjoy tonight and keep us posted.
First I want to say that post #154 was IMO one of the best posts ever and I have to admit reading the part about where Sue jokes with you about babies and grandchildren began to give me a hard-on.
By the way thanks for responding to my questions, the fact that you take time out of your day to consider and respond to issues I get curious about and find interesting speaks volumes to the way you present/maintain your Thread.
I don’t want to beat this issue to death so I will raise it one more time and then shut up about it. But in post #154 you talk about the situation going forward into the fall of 2014 (after your daughter enters post-secondary education) stating “I think this is all going to slow down substantially”. Unless there are factors that you don’t care to share through the forum, I cannot see what you are saying. IMO, given that both you and Sue will enjoy increased freedom to come and go, have your house free to entertain DAY AND NIGHT, and won’t have to worry about time factors, being caught/having to explain etc. I would think the opportunity to take this thing to a WHOLE NEW level would exist.
This brings me to the subject I brought up in post #152 about Sue choosing/connecting with a Lover who is somewhat older, but more importantly, free, unattached and available and who could take things to the next level, ie.—the “all-in”, full blown emotional affair that Sue continues to desire complete with strict, long term denial, going out on ‘real’ dates, sleep overs, going three on vacation, and yes as I mentioned before, even winding up in some kind of Poly-type situation, as that would certainly not be that far of a stretch given the right situation and desires. So when you say, as you did in post #144 that you think about her with future Lovers, what is it that you think???
Also, and I don’t mean to steal dana’s thunder from post #156 in any way, but given what you and Sue joked about in terms of her not being able to give Robert the one thing he wanted most, my question is—had you and Sue gotten into this lifestyle earlier in your life would the prospect of Sue having a child (children) with a lover have been something you and her would have considered (and no I’m not meaning having ten interracial children all with different father’s) I’m just asking if in retrospect this is something that crosses your mind and if it has, then how did you respond to your thoughts???
By the way thanks for responding to my questions, the fact that you take time out of your day to consider and respond to issues I get curious about and find interesting speaks volumes to the way you present/maintain your Thread.
I don’t want to beat this issue to death so I will raise it one more time and then shut up about it. But in post #154 you talk about the situation going forward into the fall of 2014 (after your daughter enters post-secondary education) stating “I think this is all going to slow down substantially”. Unless there are factors that you don’t care to share through the forum, I cannot see what you are saying. IMO, given that both you and Sue will enjoy increased freedom to come and go, have your house free to entertain DAY AND NIGHT, and won’t have to worry about time factors, being caught/having to explain etc. I would think the opportunity to take this thing to a WHOLE NEW level would exist.
This brings me to the subject I brought up in post #152 about Sue choosing/connecting with a Lover who is somewhat older, but more importantly, free, unattached and available and who could take things to the next level, ie.—the “all-in”, full blown emotional affair that Sue continues to desire complete with strict, long term denial, going out on ‘real’ dates, sleep overs, going three on vacation, and yes as I mentioned before, even winding up in some kind of Poly-type situation, as that would certainly not be that far of a stretch given the right situation and desires. So when you say, as you did in post #144 that you think about her with future Lovers, what is it that you think???
Also, and I don’t mean to steal dana’s thunder from post #156 in any way, but given what you and Sue joked about in terms of her not being able to give Robert the one thing he wanted most, my question is—had you and Sue gotten into this lifestyle earlier in your life would the prospect of Sue having a child (children) with a lover have been something you and her would have considered (and no I’m not meaning having ten interracial children all with different father’s) I’m just asking if in retrospect this is something that crosses your mind and if it has, then how did you respond to your thoughts???
Steve,
Like CS, it is humbling to be mentioned in despatches in your posts. Thank you. I am reminded that an infinite numbers of monkeys will ultimately write Shakespeare.
Yourself and others have intimated that you are now getting into some serious territory. Your time away from a loving emotional connection with Sue is starting to get longer, and I don't just mean the sex. I think you need to sometimes find a way to emotionally reconnect with Sue when she gets home without alluding to Robert or her activities. Even if it is just hugging and holding her.
I also think you need to take her up on her offer to do something for you if you think you really need it. In her head, she still thinks as your kink as being strange. While she accepts it (and benefits with Robert from it), she still does not see it as normal, so she still believes you must need 'release' from time to time with her. She has made this offer with all her lovers so far and to my recollection, you have never taken it up. I think you should now do so, even if the urge is not overwhelming for you. I really do think that Sue wants to see this need in you. Not this week but perhaps in the middle of your three week spell somewhere, you should insist on being in her. You have written many times before of your joy in experiencing sloppy seconds. Go for it again. Sue will be ok with it when she sees how much you really need it and enjoy it and it will do you both good to see that the primary relationships needs can take such priority, if only rarely. You could always use a condom as a compromise.
You talked a little about the long term. One thing that runs through all your posts is that Sue likes sex. A lot of good sex. Always has. It's how you connected in the first place. You must see that any long tern denial on your part (however much you might enjoy it) risks you losing Sue permanently to someone new who can emotionally bond with her and who can simply enjoy her sexuality as she likes to express it. The time when your daughter leaves home actually increases this risk. The empty nest creates far more emotional tensions in women than men. Many of them relieve this tension with a new permanent bonding. It seems likely that Robert and Sue will pull apart at some time. His desire to have children will prevail (it is the primary human driver) and his time with Sue will have helped him hugely with his view of women in general. It seems likely that he will be the one to move on. Either way, this will be a bad time for Sue. Remember how she was with Brad. This will be the time to put your denial desires back in the cupboard for a while. You will need to become again the man she needs.
Like CS, it is humbling to be mentioned in despatches in your posts. Thank you. I am reminded that an infinite numbers of monkeys will ultimately write Shakespeare.
Yourself and others have intimated that you are now getting into some serious territory. Your time away from a loving emotional connection with Sue is starting to get longer, and I don't just mean the sex. I think you need to sometimes find a way to emotionally reconnect with Sue when she gets home without alluding to Robert or her activities. Even if it is just hugging and holding her.
I also think you need to take her up on her offer to do something for you if you think you really need it. In her head, she still thinks as your kink as being strange. While she accepts it (and benefits with Robert from it), she still does not see it as normal, so she still believes you must need 'release' from time to time with her. She has made this offer with all her lovers so far and to my recollection, you have never taken it up. I think you should now do so, even if the urge is not overwhelming for you. I really do think that Sue wants to see this need in you. Not this week but perhaps in the middle of your three week spell somewhere, you should insist on being in her. You have written many times before of your joy in experiencing sloppy seconds. Go for it again. Sue will be ok with it when she sees how much you really need it and enjoy it and it will do you both good to see that the primary relationships needs can take such priority, if only rarely. You could always use a condom as a compromise.
You talked a little about the long term. One thing that runs through all your posts is that Sue likes sex. A lot of good sex. Always has. It's how you connected in the first place. You must see that any long tern denial on your part (however much you might enjoy it) risks you losing Sue permanently to someone new who can emotionally bond with her and who can simply enjoy her sexuality as she likes to express it. The time when your daughter leaves home actually increases this risk. The empty nest creates far more emotional tensions in women than men. Many of them relieve this tension with a new permanent bonding. It seems likely that Robert and Sue will pull apart at some time. His desire to have children will prevail (it is the primary human driver) and his time with Sue will have helped him hugely with his view of women in general. It seems likely that he will be the one to move on. Either way, this will be a bad time for Sue. Remember how she was with Brad. This will be the time to put your denial desires back in the cupboard for a while. You will need to become again the man she needs.
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I would like you to extend the abstinence period out to one sloppy penetration session a month, where you release a full ejaculation without a condom on into her eager pussy.
After your penis has stirred his sperm porridge and you have added yours to the mix as well, you should go down on her and lick every drop out of her that your tongue can reach.
This means she gets sexed twice on one day of the month and you don't touch her again for a complete month.
I would also like you to ask he to encourage Robert to properly mark his property with significant hickies to show you the forensic evidence that Robert is giving her a good rodgering. There are quite a few places he can mark her.
It would make my day, if you dropped back to once a month and she bought hickies home to show you the fruits of her cuddling with Robert.
I think Sue should sleep over the odd night with Robert, who is obviously a little bit shy of insisting she does do that. He is treading on eggshells, and she needs to volunteer that she wants to stay for dinner and a sleep over.
Sue needs to wake up in the morning beside him, if she is to progress his feelings for her. He needs to feel her wanting him more and more, so he can want her more and more - and express more about his need for babies to her.
After your penis has stirred his sperm porridge and you have added yours to the mix as well, you should go down on her and lick every drop out of her that your tongue can reach.
This means she gets sexed twice on one day of the month and you don't touch her again for a complete month.
I would also like you to ask he to encourage Robert to properly mark his property with significant hickies to show you the forensic evidence that Robert is giving her a good rodgering. There are quite a few places he can mark her.
It would make my day, if you dropped back to once a month and she bought hickies home to show you the fruits of her cuddling with Robert.
I think Sue should sleep over the odd night with Robert, who is obviously a little bit shy of insisting she does do that. He is treading on eggshells, and she needs to volunteer that she wants to stay for dinner and a sleep over.
Sue needs to wake up in the morning beside him, if she is to progress his feelings for her. He needs to feel her wanting him more and more, so he can want her more and more - and express more about his need for babies to her.
SoonToBe said:
Interpretation: as I see it. Sue's affair with robert is now on a level that she considers what they do as 'private,' and only something she would tell her closest Girl friend. Certainly not her husband. Therefore, Sue is feeling very 'uncomfortable' telling Steve what they do because her emotional state has now made this a very 'private' very 'personal' affair. This is consistent with the advise of Phyllis from the past.
I find it "curious" that Phyllis' advise for a "full blown affair," never came up during the Frank, Don, and Brad affairs (?)
Although Her affair with Brad did become very romantic and emotional, and is still rated, by Sue, as the best of all the affairs she has had, (that is until Robert) She wanted "privacy" then too, but relented to write Steve a "hot" description of one of her nights with Brad, and send it to Steve by E Mail
